Do Cinephiles Dream of Celluloid Sheep?

THE UNBEATABLE SQUIRREL GIRL BEATS UP THE MARVEL UNIVERSE! OGN

Written by Ryan North, art and cover by Erica Henderson, colours by Rico Renzi

Proof that we’re living in the best of all possible worlds: THERE’S GONNA BE A SQUIRREL GIRL GRAPHIC NOVEL!

It’s a stand-alone adventure that’s both great for new Squirrel Girl readers, and also for people who ALREADY know about how she can talk to squirrels and also punch really well!

Behold: a story so HUGE it demanded a graphic novel! A story so NUTS that it incorporates BOTH senses of that word (insanity AND the weird hard fruit thingies) (they’re fruits, did you know that?) (I didn’t until I looked them up just now, so looks like we’re ALL learning science from this solicit text for a comic book!)

Squirrel Girl has defeated Thanos, Galactus, and Doctor Doom. TWICE. But in this all-new graphic novel, she’ll encounter her most dangerous, most powerful, most unbeatable enemy yet: HERSELF.

The girl in the white suit hid her nerves behind the cigarette.

The curtains opened. A pale man in pressed flannel frowned.

“Who are you,” he said, rubbing sleep from his eyes, “and what the hell are you doing on my window-ledge?”

The girl balanced on her bare heels, rocking back and forth.

“I… am a fan,” she said, “Don’t worry. I’m perfectly safe.”

“I wasn’t worried,” he said, “Lose the cigarette.”

“Sorry,” she said. Her face twisted, as if her muscles used to make apologetic expressions had atrophied through neglect.

“I wanted to ask some advice,” she said as she flicked the cigarette into the void behind her.

The man thought of his breakfast cooling.

“Make it quick,” he sighed.

There was silence, or as close to silence as the rumble of the city far below would ever allow.

“I have so much I want to do, and so little time,” she said, “I want everything. Is that so much to ask? Everyone says so. Everyone says ‘be reasonable’. But then I look at you, and everything you’ve achieved, and know that 'reasonable’ is defeatist. Any one sliver of what you’ve done would be an enviable career. That it takes it all in, is an impossibility. There’s so little time, and so much work I want to do. I’m going to die but I want to be immortal. I’m trying so many things, but I’m afraid of losing myself in a–”

“Enough,” said the man, “I’ve two things for you. Listen carefully.”

“Always finish the album,” said the man, “and get the hell off my window ledge.”

The girl nodded.

“You were my inspiration,” she said, as she stepped backwards, turning to a shower of ash and sulphur, leaving tiny sooty footprints on the ledge.

The man sighed as he turned from the window. A girl dressed in a white suit, smoking, with that hair? And I was apparently inspiration? No shit.

Still – she was far from the first, and she’d be far from the last.

Star Wars: Return of the Jedi (deleted scene)

Superhero problems.