httyd book propagandist

this is the funniest possible way this show could have ended and i mean that in a completely negative and derogatory way.

i'm going to let you all in on a little secret: good omens has always been just a little bit bad. it's harder to notice in season 1 because aziraphale and crowley are REALLY COMPELLING! but once you really think about it you realize, even at its BEST, season 1 is only half about characters that are actually interesting and compelling, and it dedicates the other half of its runtime to characters nobody gives a single fuck about. seriously who gaf about shadwell AT ALL. at least 50% of the good-omens-1-watching experience is staring at your screen wondering when the endearing angel and demon are coming back.

season 2 gives us more aziraphale and crowley. thank god! it also introduces lesbians, which initially makes you say "yay!" but eventually makes you say "jesus christ, how did they manage to make ME uninterested in LESBIANS???" then it kind of fucks it all up with a completely strange ending that hits a lot of emotional beats but hits them all in a very strange order and never with quite the right amount of power behind those hits.

but i’m not here to talk about gomens 1 or 2. this is about 3. the first hour is pretty decent. it feels a bit rushed but i wasn't expecting anything else given the Circumstances. and at the very least it gave us some more aziraphale and crowley interactions (even if the romantic tension has strangely dissipated. maybe michael erased That with the book of life too). we spend too much time with non-aziraphales and non-crowleys, but given what i wrote in the paragraph about s1, i did sadly expect this. but hey! aziraphale and crowley are bantering and a little in love and that's what i wanna see.

then the last thirty minutes takes the nice, if a bit boring, ending they were maybe setting up and throws it down the stairs and stabs it several times in the back. all of a sudden everyone in the world has died (????) and so have AZIRAPHALE AND CROWLEY (??????) and i'm meant to care about two fucking nobody-men who happen to look like aziraphale and crowley??? NO!!! that's BULLSHIT!!! i was genuinely laughing the last fifteen minutes. i'm so glad i had persuaded myself the show was Never That Good, Actually, before this ending ever came out, because i think watching this if i was expecting an actual good happy ending would have had me inconsolable. my condolences to those of you who expected better. and why was jesus even there??? he just ate a sandwich and played cards and then gave out pizza and died. Okay! Fine. in fact the more i think about jesus the more pissed i get because he basically only served as a reason to get azi down to earth, and since there were already like two other mysteries going on (where’s the Book! why are the archangels disappearing!) jesus could have been cut from the plot with few to no consequences. that’s not good writing!

and crowley forgives aziraphale TOOOO QUICKLY. i know it's rushed but come on guys he's not even a little mad? okay well actually maybe that's in character. my perfect pathetic crowley who's obsessed with aziraphale <3

mind you s2 explicitly establishes that jim is a different character from gabriel because he lacks gabriel’s memories. so im completely bewildered as to why im supposed to be overjoyed about a romance between two characters who wear the faces of aziraphale and crowley but have none of their thousands of years of history. moreover, why should i believe that destroying the world was the only way they could have been happy? gabriel (once he’s recovered his memories) and beelzebub get to go off and live happily and the central couple here doesn’t?? they never exchange any words about their feelings!! what is this??