Dulled

I opened my mouth, almost said something. Almost. The rest of my life might have turned out differently if I had. But I didn’t.

There will be times in your life when you will feel underappreciated. Unloved. Lonely. And those are the best times to practice a little self-love. For years, I didn’t get the meaning behind the simple words of “love yourself”. It sounds great on paper, but what does it truly mean, in a practical sense, to love yourself? And more importantly, how do you achieve it exactly? Do you just get up in the morning and stare in the mirror and say “I love you”? Do you go around pretending you are awesome and hope that somehow that will make you feel awesome? Do you have to keep saying some mantra in your head, “I’m awesome, I’m awesome, I love myself”? Maybe it’s those things too but maybe it’s something else entirely. One time I came across a quote that single-handedly and utterly resolved the issue for me. The quote went something along these lines: “Treat yourself the way you would treat someone you love.” The quote gave me that eureka moment of finally realizing how I can practice self-love. All I have to do is simply think about the people I love and how much I want them to be happy and how I treat them and apply the same concepts to myself. For example, My friend is not worthless. They are magnificent and warm and all the things that make the world a better place and they deserve to be treated right. When I transfer that concept to myself, I realize that I make the world brighter for someone else and I deserve to be treated well by others. Or I don’t want my partner to smoke and eat junk food. I don’t want them to keep doing things that are unhealthy and that might hurt them in the future. Why should I give myself a pass on those things as well? As someone who cares about their long term future, I should steer myself towards cultivating good habits. Or My family member is feeling down and depressed. Instead of being hard on them or making it worse for them, I try to be of comfort to them. I’ll watch a movie with them if they want, cook them a meal, or bring them outside. The same concept applies to myself. I shouldn’t be hard on myself for not being at 100% sometimes and it’s alright to give myself downtime or to give in and do things that give me pleasure/happiness. See, it’s all really elemental, isn’t it? Just remember, “Treat yourself the way you would treat someone you love.”

Do not try to be pretty. You weren’t meant to be pretty; you were meant to burn down the earth and graffiti the sky. Don’t let anyone ever simplify you to just “pretty.”