carnificis

[Cian whistles and opens the can of food for himself, not interested it force feeding a grown man.] Suit yourself then. [He says, tipping the can back and sipping at a mouthful of whatever it was. Cian nods at his friends words. He’s not surprised Thomas hadn’t said anything. Times were different now and a baby was a thing most people feared, not celebrated. He couldn’t imagine if it was hime, and didn’t want to. Glancing around to make sure no one else could hear he smirks and leans in.] When I found out Becks was pregnant, I got a black eye. She sat me down, told me she was havin’ a baby and I jumped up and shouted ‘WHO’VE YA’ BEEN WITH? WHAT’S HIS NAME?’ [Cian says, and a small laugh bounces his shoulders.] Didn’t even occur to me I could be a father. I just assumed she’d been whorin’ around. Yup. She sorted me out right quick though.

{Right now Thomas is having a hard deciding if he's more bothered by the fact that he's going to be a father or how he's barely talking to the future mother of his child. It's putting a serious damper on his mood, but now that he can talk about the whole thing he hopes that something Cian will say will make him feel better. His story makes him smirk, but not much else.} You're a fucking idiot. {He sigh and looks down.} Wanted to tell you before. Sorry or whatever. {Thomas isn't quite sure how the protocol for this should go. All of it feels foreign.} 

[Cian watches as his friend walks closer, and he notes the way his small pregnant wife flinches away from his touch and can’t quite meet his eye. Lately, the Irishman hadn’t seen the married couple together often and while he had attributed it to being busy, he now wonders if it’s not something else. An eyebrow raises as as Thomas walks closer he nods at the man’s words.] Aye, I just had the same argument with your missus. Tell ya’ what I told her. Do it for the kid. [He says, shoving a can in the man’s direction.] How long ya’ known?

{Thomas can't help the way he turns away when Tessa flinches. There's a sharp pang in his chest, but he doesn't blame her. He's been avoiding her and her belly, and though he loves her, there are too many things going on in his head for him to be fully supportive. It's the main reason for his foul mood when he sits down next to Cian and shoves the can away.} Said I'm not hungry. {He says, though his voice is more tired than forceful.} A while now. More than a few weeks. {Days are starting to blend together now. He's only waiting for Tessa to move her things aside for him to become completely irrelevant.}

[Cian laughed as Tessa lost the short argument he had given her between who should eat the fruit cocktail. He rubbed her growing belly and winked at her.] Take it for the kid, yeah? [He said, and Tessa rolled her eyes and even looked somewhat confused by the familiar touch but she gave him a little smile and a mumbled thanks as she walked away. Cian shook his head and began to hunt through the cans for something else to eat. When someone new walked in, he looked up and smiled.] Hello, hello. You hungry?

{Thomas can't say he particularly enjos seeing people looking at Tessa they way they are. Though he's receiving a lower intensity of the stares, it makes him want to just leave for a couple of hours. But he can't oafford to do that now. He has to take care of Tessa, even if he has been doing it from afar. She's walking away from Cian as he's walking towards him, but he only offers a small smile a brief touch to her arm before approaching his friend.} Not much of an appetite.

[Rachel walks through a narrow row of seats towards the back of the theater. She’d put her things there while she went and got some food but walking back through broken chairs was proving to be more of a challenge than climbing over the seats. Before she knows it, though, Rachel’s foot catches on an upturned corner of carpet, propelling her forward as she fall between the seats, banging her arm on the back of one as she does. It’s so sudden that she can’t help the ring of laughter that escapes as she covers her face, especially when Eliya begins going off in her head, sighing at Rachel’s carelessness.] Ow. [It did hurt but not much so Rachel sits up on the ground, rubbing her elbow as she chuckles at herself.]

{Thomas was only walking into the theatre after patrolling when he hears a noise followed by a peal of laughter. Rifle still in his hands, the man turns towards the sound and frowns in confusion. He sees an unfamiliar woman sitting on the ground and rubbing her elbow. Ever since he broke up the fight between Mason and Evie's father, he's realized how much he appreciates the peace and quiet. Thomas extends his hand in case she wants to stand.} Are you alright?

[Wes watches as their obvious effort for Thoma to unclench his fists. If he’s not actually calmed down, at least he’s trying to. Wes doesn’t make any move to follow, simply calls out from where he’s stood.] You gonna be all right? [It’s not a question of his physical capabilities. There doesn’t even seem to be anything dangerous around this town to jump up and surprise anyone but he feels obliged to ask anyway. If Thomas simply shrugs him off and let’s be, then there’s nothing Wes could do about but he at least tries. He cares about the group - maybe not everyone individually to the same extent - but people in that sort of mood walking off alone is never a good thing.]

{Thomas sucks in a deep breath, already starting to feel better as he nears the doors.} Yeah. Just throw away that fucking book. {He says the last part to himself. Thomas will be fine. It's getting near his patrol time anyway. Might as well start early. He zips up his jacket at he pushes open the doors, looking back to nod at Wes before stepping outside.}

Sorry man, I’d offer ya some but I don’t smoke. [It’s almost a genuine apology. He doesn’t entirely understand why Thomas is so freaked out by the drawings but it’s definitely not his place to ask. Wes wouldn’t want the same questions to be thrown his way, after all. Although if he still had some of the blunts he’d found months back with Astrid, Wes probably would’ve offered that to Thomas. Looked like he needed it way more than he did right now.]

{Thomas sighs and makes a conscious effort to unclench his fists. He's desperate to talk to someone, anyone about Tessa's pregnancy, but she'd made him promise not to tell anyone. It's frustrating and right now, he thinks his mental health is taking the damage.} No... It's fine. I just... Need some air. {It sounds pathetic, but he starts heading for the door anyway, shaking his head as he goes and wishing there were some fucking zombies in this town for him to kill.}

[Wes doesn’t really need to say anything because the look he shoots Thomas’ way shows jut how much he believes any of that.] Course you are… [Wes takes another step back, shuffling the book so it sits under his arm. He watches Thomas with caution - not really sure how he’d help someone calm down.] You need to get some fresh air or something? Think it’d do you some good.

{Thomas realizes how he must look right now, clenched fists, wide eyes and murder in his gaze. The man shakes his head at the suggestion. fresh air isn't what he needs. Thomas needs some fucking stability.} No. No. I need a fucking cigarette is what I need. {Thomas begins to pat himself despite the fact that he had thrown away his cigarettes a long time ago.}

[Wes pulls himself away from the drawings at the sudden harshness of Thomas’ voice. Wes looks to the other’s man face and as his gaze drops down to see clenched fists the book’s snapped shut that instant. Thomas and Wes’ fight last time had the other man holding back and he sure as fuck doesn’t want to see Thomas genuinely angry. Wes doesn’t realise he’s taking a step back before he speaks up again.] I’ll definitely do one of those… And urm, you all right there? [Wes’ gaze alternates between the clenched fists and Thomas’ expression — waiting to see if he’s going to snap.]

{Thomas looks over sharply at the man's question, perhaps more fear in his eyes than anything else, but the emotion translates into anger easily enough.} What do you mean? I'm fucking fine. {His breaths are sort, but the only thing he's near doing is grabbing that book and throwing it as far away as he can.}

[Wes looks to Thomas, some relief that he isn’t entirely over reacting to the images. He nods, gesturing out with a hand as though to say ‘I know right?’.] It was on the floor. Nearly tripped on it. [Even then, it’s odd to see Thomas of all people slightly freaked by anything. He’s always seemed a pretty stoic man to Wes. Even though Wes knows he should probably shut the book and leave it be some morbid curiosity - maybe some vague feelings of masochism - keeps the book open and Wes’ mind firmly in the past and on his biggest failure.]

{Thomas runs a hand over his face as he looks at the drawings. It's like he can't tear his gaze away, and the truth is that they're making him kind of sick. He looks away, fists clenched before answering.} You should throw it away. Or find the owner and tell them not to leave their shit lying around.

Tessa knows it’s the stress. She knows that, but that doesn’t stop her lip from trembling or from pushing up onto her feet. She drops Reaper and her backpack to the floor and then begins to swing. Fists knock into plaster and rip her knuckles open as she tears at the words on the wall, ripping them down as best she can. It could be another trick, or it could be a note left for them to find. It could be for the Charlie who was now dead, or maybe someone else, but Tessa didn’t trust that. 

Thomas stays in the room while Tessa starts punching the walls. He's not entirely sure of what to think, or even if he shuld think at all. What kind of message is this? It's entirely possible that more than one post apocalyptic survivor is called Charlie, but the fact that they're seeing this now, after losing one of their own with the same name is a bit too creepy to be a coincidence. Thomas is lost in thought while Tessa destroys the wall. Maybe he should stop her, but he knows that violence is one of the most efficient ways of getting rid of that extra stress, if not the best. He won't keep her from letting her emotions out.

Tessa closes her eyes and sucks in a breath. She’s too tired to fight with him. “I haven’t forgotten what the risks are when I walk outside, Thomas.” she says coolly, pausing in the hallway and finally turning to look up at him. “But I do know how to handle myself. I didn’t suddenly forget how to survive. I didn’t see you complaining when I strolled into that prison without you.” she reminds him, and the words aren’t meant to ignite anything, but to remind him that she if there’s one thing she’s good at, it’s staying alive. He hadn’t really seen the worst of her face she thinks, and that was probably for the best. 

"Whatever, Tessa." Is all he answers. If she can't see the dangers of walking out by herself, without anyone else knowing where she is, then Thomas isn't going to be able to explain it to her. At least in the prison she'd been prepared for a fight with tens of other people going  inside. She hadn't been fighting alone, and she had been prepared. There's a large difference but she's too stubborn to see it and Thomas is too tired to explain it to her.

The person doesn’t answer, but the cadence to the footsteps are clue enough and she sighs as she lowers Reaper, just before he appears in the doorway with anger painted all over his face. She knows why, to a point. She went off on her own and without giving much word to anyone. She’d broken the rules, which was just one more reason she wasn’t fit to be in charge really. Still, she had barely seen the man in the past few weeks, except when they went to bed or for a few brief moments throughout the day. 

The first thing Thomas does is look her over, make sure theres nothing that would be immediately a danger to her. Aside from the entirety of her torso, she looks as normal as ever, but that doesn't take away the sheer amount of rage directed at her. The fact that she's nor instantly apologetic, and is instead pretty much calm at the whole situation has Thomas temporarily reeling. I's as if she doesn't understand that he had no idea where she was, and that could have fucking died and Thomas wouldn't have realizes.

What's Left Behind || Thomas & Tessa

People still don't seem to getting over Kimi and Charlie's absence from the group. While Thomas can't say he blames them, it's odd to see so many people affected at once. At least with Samson and Eli they hadn't known if they were dead or not, but Thomas had caught a glimpse of a large group of zombies bending over something. He could only guess it had been one of the women. There had been no point in trying to save someone that's already dead.

[Tessa only lets go of him long enough to toss the maps back into her car, and there’s a thought for a moment to mention that she need to look for a car seat, but she doesn’t bother. It was too soon to think about that stuff anyway.] C’mon, T-Dog. Let’s get your hands dirty. You know how good I look covered in grease. [She says, tossing him a playful wink that’s only mean to make him smile. She’s already pulling her hair up off the back of her neck and re-knotting it on top of her head.] Check tire pressure. Oh, and we’re gonna need to keep an eye out for anti-freeze and snow chains. I want to make sure every single car in this convoy is gonna be prepared if we wind up seeing snow, so start keeping your eyes open.

{Thomas crosses his arms and watches silently as she puts away the rest of the maps. She's still Tessa. Her being pregnant won't change anything about her personality, the person he had fallen in love with.} You look good covered in anything, Tessa. {He says with an almost bored expression, still, there's a smile on his face. She won't be able to fit under the cars soon, that's for sure. Thomas walks over to a car and kicks it with his boot. It bounces back pretty quickly, and that's how he's been checking tire pressure for years. He looks back at her and nods.} I'm pretty sure there might be some in abandoned houses. Next time we're in a neighborhood I'll check.

Uh, yeah. [Wes looks up from the book to Thomas.] Sort of. [Wes clears his throat as he flips the page of the book only to be faced with more drawings of children.] Just found a creepy fuckin’ book of children’s faces. Nothing wrong here… [It’s meant to be sarcastic but just how uncomfortable he is shows through more than he intended. This was quite literally the worst distraction he could have chosen because he can’t help but imagine all these children have passed on to.]

{Thomas takes a couple of steps closer, intrigued by the ambiguous answer Wes had given. He looks over to the sketchbook in his hands and immediately regrets it. A frown instantly appears on his face as he takes a step back.} What the fuck? {He mutters, looking up at Wes as he suppresses a shudder. The faces aren't malicious, he thinks, but seeing so many staring at him at once makes him feel watched. And of course, thoughts of the one growing inside his wife are impossible to ignore.} Where the hell did you find that thing?

[Tessa smiles when he pulls her closer, but it falls slightly into something more thoughtful at his words. He probably thought his life would be less complicated. She doubted very much that either of them thought this is where they’d be one year after sharing a meal in a army depot. Tessa has a very hard time believing the Thomas she had met then would have wanted this, would have wanted to marry the girl he made out with on the hood of a purple mustang, or have a baby with the girl he showed cool fighting moves to. He had though, and she knew he loved her, but she couldn’t help but feel like she had ruined him. There were scars on his hands because of her, and probably more scars under his skin that she had left.] Sorry. [She says quietly, with a small grin on her lips because there was no helping it now, and she wasn’t sure what else to say.]

{Thomas shakes his head at her apology.} I'm not. {Thomas had thought he would live out the rest of his days fighting the dead people that roamed the world, not settling down, marrying someone he loved and having a kid with them. It's not the most conventional of situations, but Thomas doesn't regret it. He's one hundred percent certain that if he hadn't fallen in love with her he'd still be the same asshole that didn't give a shit about anything. Thomas doesn't care about much now, but he'd like to think that his morals have slightly improved over the months.} I'm not sorry. {He repeats, if only for the sake of her believing him.}

Good thing the beard hides it. Otherwise everyone would make fun of you. [Tessa says dryly, but she glances up and smirks a bit, glad to be falling easily into some of their old humor. A thought occurs to her and her face falls in sudden surprise.] Hey. It’s October. [She says, staring up at him.] Dude, T-Dog… we met like an entire year ago. [She says, wondering if he had been just as oblivious to that as she had. It occurs to her now that a year ago, she was probably in Tobyhanna, up to her elbows in the generator room and she can remember how content she had been. Boasting to anyone who would listen and joking with Sam and Jim, trying to joke with Lydia though a few had fallen flat.]

{Thomas shakes his head and laughs at her joke, unconsciously bringing her closer because of it. He looks down, somewhat confused by her sudden exclamation. It's not only until she expands on it that he understands. He lets out a slow breath. He certainly wouldn't have thought a year ago that he'd be married to her, and that she'd be pregnant with his kid in twelve month's time. A year ago... He'd been running from a horde, trying to find another safe place to wall up in and wait out the rest of his days. His future is very different.} Damn... Can't say I thought this was the way things would go.