It could be something as simple as “I don’t think I’m ready for a relationship right now” or he could tell you how much you mean to him and how he doesn’t want to ruin your friendship and it would. Still. Fucking. Hurt.

Friendship. The word isn’t supposed to hurt that much, is it? People always see friendship as the nicest and happiest kind of relationship in the world. What they don’t know is it isn’t half as nice if it’s not what you want.

How could you be just friends with him when you see him and it feels like the whole world lowers its tone? How could you be just friends with the one person who has everything you’re looking for in a couple? How could you be just friends with his laugh and his eyes and his stupid jokes? How? How? How?

I will not say you just move on. I will not say this things happen and you should get over it. Because it doesn’t work that way. You are not obligated to feel any less miserable than you are now. You are not obligated to talk about it or be the bigger person and force yourself to do something you don’t want, like chatting with him as if nothing had happened.

The only thing you must do is heal. Cry. Listen to sad music. Write. Watch hours on end of netflix. Curse him and scream. Do whatever you have to. Just heal. You have healed before and you are strong enough to do it again, I know it. Because this is not the kind of pain you have a say on. You can’t make people love you the way you want them to, babygirl. You can only accept what they give you or leave.