train in vain

It is. I need to lie down.

Lie down and think of tea.  And London.  And not New York.

……Brixton. I need Brixton. Let’s go to Brixton.

Do you think we could get a flight there right now.

What kind of person does that.

*hisses* New Yorkers.

*looks disgusted*

It is. I need to lie down.

Lie down and think of tea.  And London.  And not New York.

What kind of person does that.

A Brit who’s spent too much time in New York?

That sounds horrifying, mate.

A Brit who's spent too much time in New York?

  New Yorkers hate taxis, though.

*BACKHANDS HIM* DON’T TOUCH ME BUDDY BOY I’LL MAKE YA SORRY YOU WAS EVER BORN

OI WHAT THE BLOODY HELL, MATE! *hits at him again*

NO STOP I'M TOO PRETTY TO BE ATTACKED NOT MY FACE

You should punch him.

But what if he pulls out a knife and tries to mug me like a New Yorker.

I dunno, uh, throw coffee at him. It should distract him.

What if I set a trap with pizza and forcibly take ‘im back to England.

Set it with coffee. Dunkin Donuts coffee, with a blueberry muffin.

And put inside of a taxi, too.

*BACKHANDS HIM* DON’T TOUCH ME BUDDY BOY I’LL MAKE YA SORRY YOU WAS EVER BORN

OI WHAT THE BLOODY HELL, MATE! *hits at him again*

You should punch him.

But what if he pulls out a knife and tries to mug me like a New Yorker.

I dunno, uh, throw coffee at him. It should distract him.

What if I set a trap with pizza and forcibly take 'im back to England.

*hits him* Stop hangin' around with them yanks, mate!

You should punch him.

But what if he pulls out a knife and tries to mug me like a New Yorker.

Last week when you didn’t get the last of the cereal. You cried so much, don’t lie.

I thought we agreed never to speak of that again.

Too bad, I’m speaking of it.

And on my birthday too, the nerve.

Last week when you didn't get the last of the cereal. You cried so much, don't lie.

I thought we agreed never to speak of that again.