Things That Get Me Off

reblog if you’re masturbating right now

why are boobs and butts so enticing they are literally sacks of fat

Am I wet? Am I on my period? Did I pee my pants?- next on wtf is going on down there.

I’m so glad this is a universal wondering among vagina-owners

and also, why do sometimes think i must be bleeding or something really bad and run to the toilet and then hardly nothing has happened, and other times i think “i’m fine” and then later realise there’s blood everywhere?

that vagina-owner feel

bitches be like “I SWALLOW” but they cant even drink pulp smh fakes

pulp is nasty cum isn’t. Sit yo ass down

you would rather have somebody’s sperm in your mouth than fruit

ya damn right

REBLOG this if you're a porn blog. I know there are more of you. Let's get off together ;)

I once made a boy cry when we were making out and getting into it and I undid his pants and his dick popped out and for some reason all I could think of was those old springy door stoppers and I just could not stop laughing and no matter how many times I tried to tell him I wasnt lauging at him I was just a fucking nerd he ended up crying on my bed while I was keeled over on the floor

Do ppl giggle during sex??

If you can’t laugh during sex you’re having sex with the wrong person.

Girls who wear cute underwear specifically for you deserve to be eaten out like they’re your last meal on death row