Golden Slumbers

Why Wayne got socks in the jacuzzi

those are his hooves you bitch

This post changed us fundamentally

I chose my fucking confirmation name because it was my crushes’ name 🥲 I thought it was to be eternal, seal the deal, etc.

this was the exact kind of addition to this post i was hoping for

I love that heidi klum, international super model and tv personality, was like “I’m going to be a worm for halloween” and went for the most horrifying hyper realistic version possible and was quoted saying (in said worm outfit) ‘I want to put a smile on peoples faces’. ma’am I am gagging but I love that for u

her boyfriend said yes to "would you still love me if I was a worm"

this weed got me talking like a vampire

i just told my roommate "release me" instead of goodbye after she facetimed me

Me when my man tells me he’s turning the light on and I’m still not ready

how come we’re always forced to choose between kids and a job??? i dont want either

this is probably one of the funniest things i’ve ever seen.

I LOVE ALL THE SPORTS!!! THAT ONE WHERE YOU USE YOUR FEET AND THE ONE YOU USE YOUR HANDS!! LOVE IT