For a long moment, the inside of the car was silent except for the sound of a burger wrapper.
Nightwing started to take a bite, then stopped with a sigh.
Even he could not pretend that this was normal.
âWhat is she doing here?â he asked finally.
âIâm helpinâ,â Harley said, somehow managing to say it quite clearly even though her lips never touched. Her lipstick was a dark matte, and getting a dark matte just right required surgical precision that she could somehow still manage in the back of a moving vehicle without any lights.
âIn case he needs backup!â
âThatâs why Iâm here,â Nightwing pointed out.
âSure,â she said, somehow making the word sound entirely composed of vowels, snapping her compact shut. âNow.â
Nightwing sighed. âI was ten minutes late.â He looked to Batman, who said nothing. âTen minutes.â
âA lot can happen in ten minutes,â Harley said, primly putting her things back into her bag.
Batman still said nothing, but tilted his head just enough and just long enough that Nightwing knew he was looking pointedly at his fries.
âIâm not apologizing for the fact that I wanted real food,â Nightwing said. He turned around in his seat to look back at Harley. âHave you seen his little protein shake things?
âTheyâre his robo-fuel!â
âYou know heâs not a robot.â
Harley and Nightwing both looked at Batman. Nightwing turned back around in his seat. âI had a busy day, I didnât have time to eat, so I got some food. It was a totally reasonable thing to do.â
âWhatâs even your day job?â Harley wondered. âY'ainât gettinâ paid for this.â Then she gasped. âAre ya in college now?â she asked, delighted.
âHe dropped out,â Batman said before Nightwing could respond.
Harley gasped even louder.
âNow, wait a minute,â Nightwing began, before Harley interrupted by cuffing his ear. âOw! Harley!â
âThatâs Dr. Harley to you, young man.â She looked to Batman. âTell him he has to go back to school.â
âHeâs an adult now,â Batman said. âHe can do what he wants.â
Harley narrowed her eyes at Nightwing. âIs that why ya had that mullet?â
âIt was not a mulletââ
âIs this what youthful rebellion looks like when a dork tries to do it?â
âYouâd know better than I would,â Batman said.
âHey!â She backhanded his shoulder, then sighed. âI guess I did go to med school.â She reached over Nightwingâs shoulder to grab a fry. âBut I also did a lot of coke.â
Nightwing, mid-sip, choked on his iced tea.
âA looooot of coke,â she added, chewing. âIn retrospect I was prolly self-medicatinâ.â She put a hand on Nightwingâs shoulder. âNot that that makes it okay,â she said. âListen to your Aunt Harley. Donât do coke.â
âYes, Dr. Aunt Harley.â
âIf ya needed money for school, ya coulda called me,â she said.
âYou donât have any money.â
âI can get money.â She paused. âAnâ Iâm real good at gettinâ scholarships.â
âYouâre a genius,â Batman reminded her, managing to make the statement of fact sound not at all complimentary.
âThat did help,â she agreed.
âWhy is she actually here?â Nightwing asked.
âShe has some leads on Crane.â
âIâve been tryinâ to find him so we can have a nice talk about medical ethics,â she said with a grin.
âShe wants to cave his skull in with a giant hammer,â Batman corrected.
âAnâ youâre gonna try anâ stop me!â she agreed, still just as cheerful. She leaned forward to drape her arms over the headrest of both front seats. âWeâre gonna have so much fun.â