gedachtensoep

Lean on me, I already fell for you, any way.

Have you ever platonically fallen for someone? For the things they say and how they can always cheer you up, no matter the circumstances? For how you can count on them and the way they get so enthusiastic about the things they love? Have you ever watched someone without them noticing and just felt your heart burst of love for everything they do and everything they are, feeling incredibly proud to have them as a friend? Have you ever been in awe due to the feeling of being blessed by the sheer existence of another human being?

Let me learn about you, about all the little things you do, about your favourite flower and the songs you sing in the shower Let me look at you up close from the back of your hand to the tip of your nose, your prominent cheekbones and your little toes Let me know of your dearest story which filled days with endless glory, so we can lay in bed when there’s shitty weather, to read it out loud and escape together.

She is a year ago. She is the ache in the empty, the first time you changed your mind and the last time you were sorry about it. She is a city sleeping beside you, warm and vast and familiar, streetlights yawning and stretching, and you have never. You have never. You have never loved someone like this. She is your first stomach ache. Your first panic attack and your favorite cold shower. A mountain is moving somewhere inside of you, and her handprints are all over it. Here. Here. Here, you love her. In the fractured morning, full of too tired and too sad, she is the first foot that leaves the bed. She is the fight in you, the winning and the losing battle floating like a shipwreck in your chest. When they ask you what your favorite moment is, You will say Her. You will always say Her.