Tumbling down tumbling down...

Look, while I am certainly a proponent of the Greet Every Day with Breathless Wonder school of thought, I think it's also good to sometimes remember that you are a human creature with electrified fat in your skull and you only have so much Breathless Wonder in you. Some days you will be tired and hate everything and some days you will just kind of exist. And if you also end up beating yourself up over having ungratefully wasted the irreplaceable day that'd suck okay. Not being able to find singular beauty and joy in every single goshhecking moment isn't a personal failure. You gotta have like. a baseline. variability of experience. you know. Not everything can glow all the time. It's fine. You're fine.

Braves the Cruel Winds of Fandom Tumblr just to post about how when you think about it, Shan Gudao being just some commoner orphan just makes everything about him more impressive. Like Shan Gudao who was not actually the heir to any ancient magical noble bloodline, who was just some amnesiac street kid, this Shan Gudao was trained by Qi Mushan and Madam Qin and was Li Xiangyi's sparring partner. Sure he couldn't measure up to LXY but it's not like anyone else could! Random beggar kid becomes number two in the wholeass Sigu Sect, high class jianghu badass. Tricks Li Xiangyi that foxiest fox fucks with him for years. Tricks the fox's master. Nobody rando Shan Gudao pulls one over the entire martial world AND imperial court comes thisclose to world domination. So weak and unspecial and ungifted and he fathers Fang Duobing. to quote my babygirl Jack Rackham if this is defeat for me, then know this: you and I were neck and neck in the race right till the end. But Jesus, did I make up a lot of ground to catch you.

Really gotta finally decide if I'm leaving my thatched cottage or not