The Mind Unwinds

Sometimes I just feel so explicitly stuck. What comes to mind is like a scene in a movie where I am moving in slow-motion or standing still while everything and everyone else is moving super fast. Like I am just enduring everything around me, waiting for the future to create something better.

But what if it doesn't? What if even I spend the rest of my life enduring?

Will I spend my entire life just waking up going to do some sort of work and then going home only to repeat the same thing day after day. 

We are told in our live that there are certain steps we must follow in order to achieve our goals but what if all we do is just follow steps and never actually reach any goals? I can't help but be anxious that I will not be able to live up to this potential I honestly believe I have. I couldn't live with my self if I just ended up staying in one place my whole life just enduring and doing things that people expect me to do.

Just a question to anyone out in the tumblr universe, why do people fangirl? I am not saying that I don't and I'm not saying its a bad thing, but what motivates us to fangirl and what is our main goal (if there is a goal) as fangirls? Also is there really a definition of a fangirl?

How does one become so attached to someone who they have not known  for long? How does this someone become so essential when choosing emotions?

My emotion lately.. Sad. 

I thought about you today.

In fact I've thought about you every day since that fateful day

Missing you and realizing when I said I loved you I had meant it more than I had realized.

And I still don't understand why and how it happened so quickly 

One day you were you and I was I

Then the next day we were we 

And then we weren't, just like that

It all seemed so stupid and useless 

So unnecessary and I was sure I'd forget you just like everyone else before you 

Still I think of you and it hurts 

There's a new girl in your pictures and all I can wonder is are you happy? Do you feel more whole?

Do you miss me? Probably not. 

You were the last person I ever truly gave my self to, letting the whole me come out.

You saw the parts of me that didn't match my out sides.

Was that my mistake?

I have so many unanswered questions

We are taught in school to analyze characters

we are given two categories 

supporting and main

the main character carries the story, they are captivating and interesting 

a main character takes the story and pushes it a long forcing the story to take turns, jumps and leaps

the supporting character is supposed to be there to simply help support the main character