â Iâm not going to do anything to her. â
â I thought you would erase her memory or something⌠again. â
â So sheâs just gonna get away with it? â
â Iâm not the magic police. â
â They wonât be back here. They know whatâll rain down on them if they do. â
â What they do out there, itâs not my business; itâs not yours. Do you understand? â
â Next time, you will not be so lucky. â
â Life ainât fair. Woe is you. â
â Now, please, leave before she sees you here. â
â I know you feel that youâve had to leave, but Iâd really like you to come back. â
â This is just one small corner of the world. â
â Thereâs a lot more out there to see, and Iâd like you to see it. â
â I was wrong. You are far too gifted not to be with us. â
â Just come back for a week, and if you donât like it, then, please, by all means, be a farmhand. â
â I specialize in feet. Broken bones, warts⌠â
â Hi. Iâm going to get a drink. â
â I feel really terrible about, um⌠I just thought⌠â
â I wouldnât be standing here talking to me if I were you. â
â Can anybody hear me? Anybody? Anybody? â
â Yeah, I didnât ask for a mentor. I donât give a shit. â
â Thereâs no discipline that has more power and possibility. â
â Itâs a terrible, life-destroying burden. â
â Lost my leg to frostbite. Iâd be dead if not for one deeply confused Sherpa. â
â Travelersâ training wheels. Your body stays here; your mind travels. Itâs like being a ghost. â
â Meditating wonât stop you from having a wet dream and waking up in the Marianas Trench. â
â It works by binding your body to Earth. â
â Wonât make the voices go away, but it might keep you alive. â
â There arenât enough noble quests to go around. â
â How am I supposed to impress anyone? â
â Itâs a game designed a billion years ago to keep students from killing each other in duels. â
â Itâs like chess. Kind of. Not really. â
â I donât know. That sounds kind of fun. â
â Thereâs gonna be a tournament. â
â Itâs supposed to be a surprise, but I like ruining things. â
â Well, luckily there are some treatment options, some, uh, really interesting new therapies. â
â Um, do you⌠Uh, do you feel sick? â
â Eh, there was some dizziness, headaches. â
â I never see you anymore since you went to this new school. â
â Thinking a lot about mistakes, you know, things I would do differently. â
â I couldnât sit through one more card trick, but if thatâs what makes the world bearable to you, then you go off and do card tricks. â
â Donât try to be something youâre not. â
â Youâre studying what now? Finance? â
â You know youâre still on my insurance, right? â
â You checked yourself into a mental hospital a couple of months ago. â
â Iâm not trying to pick a fight with you, son. â
â Iâm just trying to⌠fix what I broke. â
â Weâre friends, right? Uh, I was wondering if you could do me a tiny favor. â
â I just feel deeply that we are connected and are meant to work together. â
â Hey. Sorry, Iâm a little early. I knocked a couple times. â
â You have no idea how relieved I am to see you like this. â
â I was gonna put it a bit more delicately than that. â
â We need to go to the hospital. â
â There are treatments available. I chose not to pursue them. â
â I donât want you to die. â
â I can give you the names of some journal articles. â
â What youâre looking for might be impossible, and it will require far more energy than you can muster. â
â I love you. Oh⌠you baked. â
â You can have one, if you think you can afford it. â
â Thereâs a whole world of things besides this. â
â I almost burned down my apartment, and all I can think about is trying it again. â
â Your boyfriend could have done this for you. â
â You know, a beautiful girl calls you in the middle of the night, never mind sheâs a little intense⌠â
â Youâre late, and this is mandatory! â
â If you get any one of them wrong, the whole thing goes to hell. â
â One spell so powerful, it wiped the whole board. â
â You know, why canât it run on⌠love⌠or cocaine or something? â
â Itâs the universe deep-dicking us. Lie back and try and enjoy it. â
â Well, if you know so much, why donât you show us? â
â Hmm, well⌠Could start by stealing me a sandwich. â
â Itâs not their fault that theyâre the tortoise and youâre the hare. Theyâre not even in the race. â
â Look, you want something better, get out of town; go to where the talent is. â
â You slept with me two days ago. â
â Thatâs a pretty loose fucking definition of love. â
â He doesnât know the most important thing about you. â
â Please help me. Please come for me. Please help. â
â I didnât know what happened to her. I figured she was dead. â
â Youâre supposed to be my fucking mentor. â
â What the hell do you want from me? â
â Youâre the one who saw her, and itâs not my problem. â
â My advice? Get that tattoo as soon as possible. â
â I have so much to teach you about drinking. â
â Itâs a three-year program. Graduate level. It begins immediately. â
â Mm. How may I help you, sir? â
â Heâs sort of our unofficial mascot. â
â But you didnât listen, did you? â
â You can even save someoneâs life, but you might alter their soul in the process. â
â We can fix some things. So we fix what we can. â
â You need to leave now. Youâre pathetic. â
â What is this, some sort of sick revenge because I wouldnât screw you again? â
â You want to stand on our shoulders, and you havenât, not once, taken any of our advice. â
â Honestly⌠What do you care about? â
â I donât know. Iâm still figuring that out. â
â Well, then this is the perfect place to be. â
â Get ready for the first spanking you wonât enjoy. â
â Thatâs actually kind of hot. â
â Helps if you hold a pleasant image in mind, such as a baby, if you tolerate those. â