help

no one says big mood anymore. no one even says mood. no one says anything. all thats left is a dry wind, that scours my face until i bleed

it is impossible to watch a movie. every night i think i want to watch a movie. no movie gets watched. because it's not possible

and yet they keep making movies with the hopes that one day humanity will discover a way to watch them. it's so inspiring

omg if i was an oracle i would be LYYYYYINGGGG

the bus is never going to come because im a bad person

I can’t overshare because that would be very humiliating but everyone else should overshare because I like to know everything

im going to fix my entire life

When?

Like Um. later

Ok. What you're gonna want to do is chop up a cucumber and put it in a bowl. Then you're gonna sprinkle a generous portion of salt on top. Then you're gonna drizzle them with a balsamic vinaigrette and gently shake to combine, leaving you with a cool and refreshing summer snack. In 15 seconds dangerous and burly men are going to drag me away to an unknown second location. Remember everything I've taught you. I love you

As a kid, I wasn’t allowed to touch the hot stove with my bare hands. But now I get to do it whenever I want

if anything happens in your life you should start having strange thoughts and beliefs

"it's just stress" oh thank god, it's just the silent killer that slowly kills you, perfectly harmless, no need to worry

it's disorienting when you beat me with a shovel

Remember to kill everything in your way today no hesitation