are you ready?

DO NOT DOWNLOAD TUMBLR it will install a virus on your device called tumblr

Hence the not-uncommon adage that the washing machine did even more for women's liberation than the birth control pill

I am pleased by people messaging me telling me that after adding a carb or protein to their snacks or meals they feel more satisfied all day. Yes, my plan is working. People are getting through their days with less hangry.

I hate that “chat” now makes people think of chatgpt. no. I’m asking my imaginary greek chorus twitch audience.

i would like to officially thank sesame for its seeds, its oil, and of course its street

the problem with tumblr spells is all of you lil sluts are casting and not giving it time to charge so you're all casting cantrips and not 9th level death spells. everyone wants to be the one to take them down no one wants to be the one who assists

Wait stop. everyone +like now and spread it a little but cast on the same day in August. lets try August 6th or something.

"terminally ill people should be allowed to choose to die if they feel it is the best decision for them" and "euthanasia can easily become eugenics" and "we should provide support for depressed and suicidal people" are statements that can come into conflict but should all be respected

also “offering euthanasia to people who can’t afford actual treatment is murder”

religion is so fucking funny the world is just too beautiful there must be a higher entity behind all this. lets oppress women

The entire point of, OK, my phone really wants to call it Anastasia so I guess we’re doing that? The entire point of Anastasia (as administered by a board-certified Anastasiologist) during sugary. Sugary? Haven’t I suffered enough? The entire point of Anastasia during augury. Jesus Christ. Hold up. You know what, augury is preferable to sugary. Augury is obviously performed by an auger (makes sense if you give it a think) whereas sugary is performed by…? A sugardaddy? NO THANK YOU. Anyway. The entire point of Anastasia is so that you don’t know what music your sturgeon. Fuck right off. Was playing. While you were under. You’re not supposed to wake up from Anastasia and immediately realize you managed to get earwormed by Motörhead’s “Ace of Spades” during your sugary.

forget everything anyone has ever told you on the matter the truest marker of adulthood is starting to hear the siren call of high quality kitchenware

to be clear you SHOULD buy that cast iron pan and you SHOULD buy that knife set and you SHOULD buy that fancy rice cooker and you SHOULD buy that novelty mug. high quality kitchenware is always worth it you’re literally gonna be using that almost every day

and Travis Scott was there

reading comprehension is so bad you have to start asking people straight up if they know what specific words mean instead of arguing. do you know what the word "some" means? do you know what the word "almost" means? do you know what the word "however" means? like literally

hey so! if you only read the dialogue in a book, WATCH A MOVIE OR READ A SCREENPLAY!!!! if you only WRITE dialogue in a book, WRITE A SCREENPLAY!!!!! YOU ARE NOT READERS!! it's not "literary gatekeeping", it's HOW BOOKS WORK. also. there's legitimately no way to "prioritize plot" if you only write dialogue. THATS NOT HOW THAT WORKS!!!!!!

I mean even the shortest books are usually above 6 hours long in audio format. Like, you do have to take a day of work to finish that. Where do you get a 100 completely free days a year?

Do you feel the need to listen to an entire audiobook in a single sitting while also not doing anything else? I used to put away an audiobook a week during my commute alone.