i woke up but still i dream
a nightmare
i woke up chewing glass!
it splintered my tongue wide open
my cheeks are raw and i bleed down my front onto crisp
lines
but i can't help it i am compelled to keep eating the
GLASS!
glass.
a clear wall
my alabaster friend says over and over and over
we have to break through.
they don’t see that they hold the hammer and that i—
my mouth is being held open to catch the pieces so they don't litter the floor.
my limbs are bound behind me and eating is my only option.
not only does it tear my mouth so that my protests fail
jagged broken twisted phrases i never meant but
down
it
goes
tearing into the tunnel of me and
SHARDS
grate against my insides.
the space behind my chest is ripped so anytime i try to speak i just bleed
out
red on yellow blurs into a summer picnic
condiments on a hot dog
it’s my all-American dream and
i can’t eat the proffered item i don’t eat flesh
but i smile politely and
anyway
they have angelic ears, they hear what they want to hear:
my pleas to please listen become
acceptance/ warrant/
"my asian american friend who is basically white is so strong/ is an example/ eats her pain."
i am chewing GLASS.
how do they not see my jaw bloody and broken my throat torn worn open
not just by my own swallowing but their incessant feeding me of
glass?
i am not breaking through. i am chewing a mountain of leftovers:
fed a diet veiled with praise my life to groom me,
i've taken thousands of plastic particles willingly but i didn't know.
they didn't prepare me for the truth that i'd have to clean up for them and explain their destruction masked as celebration
"tear down this wall!"
who built this fucking wall
"it was a broken system!"
it was built broken
so they climb up, my friend, they stand on the roof and they look down and calls for me to join them
“it is so free and clear up here”
but i am bound on the ground and
dying
still cleaning up their mess with my mouth
i am awake now that it has traveled through my bloodstream tearing every artery apart the fire glinting across the full of me
i am awake but still i am in a nightmare i am chewing glass.











