Hi. This is my early access fanfic page. I post fanfics on ao3 but sometimes they take a while to write and are in development for a while. I also tend to be unsure of ideas, and sometimes need ideas to write. You guys can request fanfics here, and you’ll get to see my fanfics before I post them. Here’s my ao3, and welcome.
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They struggled for a moment, before throwing soul in their cage, then flopped onto their bed.
They rolled over and sighed. They were bored and frustrated. They closed their eyes but just as they were about to drift off, their door opened.
“Hey sweetie, I’m going out for tonight! There’s food in the fridge if you get hungry, and please try to have some fun while I’m out. Maybe invite a friend or two?” Toriel said from the door. When greeted to no answer, she quietly left.
They waited until they felt her car drive away to sit up. Maybe they should invite their friends. But Susie was on a date with Noelle, and berdly was studying for the test next week. Kris would be studying as well, but it’s whatever. They can study tomorrow.
They sat in silence for a while before getting up and going towards their drawer. They pulled out a knife and went to their closet.
SLASH!*
A glowing portal pulsed in front of them. Without hesitation, they stepped through. The sound of the cage rattling slowly faded as they landed in the dark world.
They wandered around a while before finding ralsei, whom was sat alone staring up with a face of wonder.
They approached quietly and stopped next to her. When she didn’t notice them, they gently reached for her hand, and as soon as they grazed each other—she jumped and noticed them.
“Oh! Hey Kris. Sorry, you spooked me!”
“It’s…alright.”
“So…what are you doing here? Come to battle some more?”
“No. Susie was busy tonight and my mom won’t be home for a while…so I thought…maybe you’d wanna come sleep over in the light world?”
Ralsei froze in shock for a moment, her face going bright red. “I-I’d love to!! But…how will you get me there without someone noticing? Won’t people have questions? Will I look different in the light world?—oh!! And what will you look like in the light world?!”
“Ral. You’re thinking too hard about this. You’re gonna make yourself panic.”
They point to the portal they entered through.
“We’ll go through there, it leads straight to my bedroom. No need to worry, it’ll just be us.”
She paused, thinking about them being all alone. Just the two of them. Then nodded with her face in her scarf.
They took her hand and walked to the portal. Her mind wondered about what they would do, and they only thought of the pie in the fridge and the new horror movie that they’d just bought a few days ago.
Once they both stepped through, kris looked back at ralsei. She was almost the same, but with a slight pink hue to her fur.
“D-do I look okay?”
“Yeah. The light world suits you well” they said with a smile. Ralsei savored it, not knowing when she’d next see it. Though, it wouldn’t be long.
Ralsei followed Kris down stairs and sat on the last step as kris set everything up. Taking a pie from the fridge, laying blankets on the couch, and dusting off the dvd player. It was interesting to her.
She snickered and stood up, walking over to Kris. “What cha’ doin’?”
“I’m setting everything up so we can watch a new movie I got” they mumbled, not looking up from what they were doing.
She smiled and sat down. Before they could even get comfortable, Kris had handed them a blanket and a slice of pie.
She blushed and buried her face in her scarf. Kris sat next to her and pulled some blanket over themselves as the movie started. A title flashes on screen; “the spooky boogie 3”
Ralsei looked confused, but just leaned against Kris a little and watched. Soon, it spooked ralsei, and she landed half in their lap. She looked up and Kris just paused the movie.
“I’m tired. If you want you can finish the movie, but I’m gonna go to bed.”
“Yeah, I think I’m gonna finish the movie. I’ll come up when I’m done?”
They nod, hand her the remote, then head upstairs. After another hour or so, ralsei heads upstairs, though still shook by the movie. It was quite scary. She laid in her sleeping bag on the floor, but all she could do was stare at the ceiling.
“Hey, you good?” Kris whispered.
“…Y-yeah…” she whispered back.
“No, like, seriously.”
“……no….that movie was really scary….”
Kris opened there blanket. “If you’re scared, you can sleep with me.”
Ralsei giggled as she climbed up. “Thank you, my knight” she said jokingly.
“Anything, princess.” They mocked. They snickered, and slowly fell asleep in each other’s arms.
Okay! Disclaimer; overdosing, depression, and suicide!! There aren’t graphic depictions, but there is a mild description and I don’t want anyone reading this without knowing! Please don’t do anything in this fic, and if you’re having thoughts of harming yourself or others then please reach out to your local suicide prevention hotline, or a trusted adult.
Today was one of many for mob. He was a good kid with a good amount of friends, but he hasn’t been feeling like himself for…a while. It was like the world had slowed. The air gone heavy. It made getting out of bed hard. It made taking care of himself hard. It made everything hard. Like trudging through water while you’re the only one drowning.
Today was no different. Except that today was the day he’d give in.
He had woken up 20 minutes ago. His parents left earlier than usual due to trouble at his dad’s work and a club his mom was in starting early that day. Ritsu had left for school before mob even woke up, because he couldn’t seem to get him up and he didn’t want to be late himself. His brother was strong, he could handle it.
Mob—since he had awoke—just stared at the wall. His hair a mess, is pajamas still clinging to him, his odor fowl, his phone buzzing, and his mind loud yet silent of thought. He head was a jumble, jumping thought to thought with no real substance to any of it. His body felt like it was being crushed by boulders as his eyes could barely stay open. He curled up in his blanket and squeezed his eyes shut for a long moment—his breath held—before sighing and slowly sitting up.
He reached for his phone and flipped it open. 20 messages from his master, 99+ from the body improvement club, 62 from teru, and many missed calls from them all. As badly as mob wanted to get up, get dressed, and apologize to all of them, he just…fell back into bed and flipped his phone closed. He closed his eyes and felt a tear trickle down. Was this how he would feel forever?
.
.
.
Thats no way to live.
Today was a bright sunny day. Birds chirping, children laughing, and the hope he’d get to see that cute face before arriving to black vinegar middle school. They did it everyday; teru would meet his mob on his way to school, they’d hold hands and talk for a few miles, then split off to their own schools. Recently though, mob had been looking…sicker. He was worried for him. His mob had been paler than normal, and a lot less talkative—and just now, he’d made it to school with no sign of his beloved mob. Today would be long, and he didn’t know if he could manage the whole day with the worry in his chest. He’d been sending texts and calls all morning to no avail; which was not like him at all.
He sighed and went inside school. As usual, he walked around greeting his friends, and first period went flawlessly, but his eyes were drawn to his phone every 5 seconds—hoping mob was okay. He was probably just overthinking, like usual! Mob could handle himself…he just couldn’t help but worry.
Eventually, school ended, and he hurried over to mobs school—catching up to his little brother; ritsu, who was walking home with his boyfriend, shou .
“Hey!! Ritsu!”
“Oh, hey teru.”
“So, I don’t mean to be too forward or blunt, but…how’s mob?”
The mood grimaced. “He’s…not doing well. I think he’s sick…Me and shou were gonna get him some snacks to cheer him up”
“Okay…I’ll go check on him while you do that…”
They both nodded and went their separate ways.
Mob had just woken up again. He had gotten another 10 minutes of sleep and was now forcing himself up again despite the weight of the world on his shoulders. The moment he got to his feet, he felt a wave of nausea and he quickly stumbled to the bathroom where he threw up then fell over and smacked his head into the bathtub. It hurt like hell, but he luckily didn’t break anything. He laid on the floor of his bathroom, looking around through his eyelashes before locking on the pill cabinet. He struggled, but pulled himself up once more after 30 minutes of silence struggle.
He shuffled through the cabinet with shaky hands, his eyes bloodshot as he didn’t blink. He slowly pulled out two bottles of pills and downed them both, before starting to go around the cabinet and down every bottle. His eyes started to blur, his nose started to bleed, and he soon passed out onto the floor with foam coming from his mouth, where he would stay for 3 hours.
Teru walked down the street, head down. He typed another desperate text and sent it before looking up. The kagayama house. A place he wished he visited more often. He invited himself in and looked around. There was no sign of mob, it was just a silent house. Despite that, teru shook all bad thought away and put his shoes away before calling out;
“Mob!! I came to check on you! I bet you missed me!”
No answer. Odd.
No matter, he just went upstairs and was immediately struck with worry at the sight of mobs door wide open—nobody inside—and the bathroom door slightly cracked open. He could also smell something awful. This wasn’t good. Had something or someone broken in? Why would they need to go into the bathroom? Did they take mob? Questions raced through his head as he ran over and opened the bathroom door, freezing in the doorway at the sight. It was horrible. It was a sight that would never leave his eyes, and he covered his mouth in a desperate attempt to not throw up. The smell, the sight—it was all too much. Mob. His mob. His dearest shigeo…he never even told him how he felt. Maybe if he had done more, known better, confessed sooner, it…it would’ve kept him here at least a little while longer…maybe he would’ve talked about this before going so far. Tears welled up as he took one shaky step closer then 4 backwards—almost falling down the stairs but just barely stabilized himself.
As he stormed off, he wiped his tears in anger. His thoughts were a mush of words, all coming to one conclusion; he feels for shigeo more than a friend should. So he runs. He goes and goes until he can’t anymore with no mind for anyone around him. By the time he stops, he’s walked so far it looks almost like nowhere through his bangs and the pouring rain. He clutched his arms and sat down, his sopping wet clothes making a squelch. The world felt…gray. Dimmer and duller than ever before, yet he could only think about every moment he’d seen mob. That morning on the bus, where he could hardly listen through his pounding heart that said “You can’t feel this way” with each beat. When he rushed away from mob to keep himself from breaking down in shame for his feelings. When he first met him. How he was the best thing in his life. How he became better because of mob, and he somehow ruined it for himself. Mob would never speak to him again, and he couldn’t tell if that pit in his stomach was excitement at the feeling potentially leaving or fear at the thought of a grey life. He felt himself slowly lose focus on that and lay down in the dirt and mud. He deserved this. He was dirty, for these feelings and thoughts. A boy shouldn’t like another boy this way, especially not his best friend.
He slowly opened his eyes to a roof above him. He bolted up—where was he?! He turned to see ritsu in the doorway of mobs room, holding fresh clothes for Teru. Teru immediately relaxed when he saw ritsu, but tensed again when he realized mob was bound to be there as well.
“Hey Teru,” ritsu said as he set the clothes down for him. “Mob told me you were acting strange and were avoiding him?”
He grumbled and nodded, slipping his shirt on.
He sighed. “Listen, Hanazawa.” He slowly sat down next to Teru, looking him in the eye with a straight face. “You…really, hurt mob with that stunt you pulled. Mob is a good guy, and the way you made him feel? Not cool.” He paused. Taking a breath with a slight huff of a laugh. “And he still went out to check on you! He stayed out until 2 am last night looking for you and then carried you 10 miles to our house!”
Teru looked at ritsu, his eyes holding an aching guilt. Ritsu stood up, and just before he could reach the door, terus shaky voice began to start, this time with his feelings bubbled up.
“I didn’t mean to hurt him” his voice held up, struggling under the weight of the words. “…it’s my fault. I fucked up.”
ritsu slowly approached and sat again, this time with softer eyes.
“I…I like him…s-so much more than I should…” tears ran down his face and he slowly broke down. “I want to love him. I want him to smile at me the way he did with tsubomi and I want him to think of me like I think of him”
He buried his face in his knees and sobbed until he felt a hand on his back. He slowly looked at him through his lashes and tears, waiting for insults, disgust, or something about him being repulsive.
“That’s okay.”
He shot up, his face full of fear and uncertainty, but most definitely excitement. “How?!”
Ritsu was taken aback, but continued; “it’s okay that you’re gay.” He chuckled. “Me and shou have been dating for god knows how long, and mob is bi himself!”
He looked shocked, his face a bit warmer than before. “W-…what’s…bi?”
“He likes girls and boys.” He closed his eyes and crossed his arms, “I’m sure if you just told him your feelings then you probably would’ve been able to talk it through! I’m pretty sure he likes you too, he always talks to you—“ he peeked his eye open and noticed Teru was gone.
Teru rushed down the stairs, nearly tripping many times. He stopped at the bottom, where he spotted the back of mobs head at the coach. Mob turned to look and saw Teru.
“Oh, hey Teru, I’m glad you’re awake—“
Teru came over and grabbed his cheeks. His hands were shaky and his stomach swirled with anxiety as he stared a very confused mob in the face. Maybe if he just blurted it out, this would fix everything. He took a breath and suddenly said:
“I have a really big crush on you and I have no idea how to fix it or what to do.”
Once said, he felt his heart drop and time stop, the next moment felt like an anxious eternity, until mobs face reddened and he responded quietly.
“I…I didn’t know you liked me back…”
Teru sighed i relief and sat down with a relieved sigh. He leaned against mob,
“Does this make us….”
“I…yes….we can be boyfriends…but let’s try to keep it slow.”
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Today was a new day and the first day of highschool. Mob sat up, messy hair and sleepy mind. He got up and went to the bathroom, brushing his hair and his teeth as his mom shouted about hurrying it along.
He spiffed up his bangs, made sure they were even, and tied his hair up so he wouldn’t feel his hair on his neck. After getting dressed He went down stairs and stopped at the table to grab a bite before catching his the city bus to his high school. He wasn’t particularly excited, because school was school, but he hoped to see his friends there. While he was daydreaming, his mother was saying goodbye to his father—who was headed to work. The mornings had gotten much more tight ever since they started highschool-
“Oh mob, when are you going to cut your hair?” His mother said as she walked up, breaking his daydream.
“I like it longer.”
“I know, I know, it’s just…” she gently pinched his cheek and sighed softly. “Forget I asked. You’re still my little shigeo, no matter what you look like”
Mob smiled a little, but turned to the door. “I should get going, I’ll miss my bus if I’m not there soon”
“Have a good day!!” Was all he heard as he left.
Teruki and mob had been friends for a while, but as they’ve become closer, mob felt warmer and warmer around him. It was like Tsubomi all over again, except this time he got to talk to him on a daily basis and know him more than a brief friendship. In all honesty, they’d only been friends for around 3 years, but it had felt like a lifetime.
While all this swirled, mob stopped at the bus stop just in time to catch the bus. With 190 yen, he was let on and spotted the blonde and purple dear that stood with a semi-excited, semi-anxious expression on his face; Teruki hanazawa. His heart fluttered and he came over. He tried talking to him, but he didn’t seem very talkative today, so he stayed quiet. Teruki was probably just tired or not in the mood, which was okay with mob.
The bus eventually stopped at furuya public high school, their new place of learning. Teruki got off almost in a hurry, but his first class could just be in a further part of the school and he just doesn’t want to be late, so he didn’t say anything. He went about his business and headed towards his class.
He ran into some other friends. The body improvement club for one, luckily they already talked to the new school principal and are still a club so mob still has something to do after school—he also spoke to some others, tsubomi, masami, ichi—and he still managed to get to his first class. It along with most others was uneventful, but lunch came around and he went outside.
He sat with his food, once he was done, he got up and went to speak with Teru again, hoping that after a few hours he’d want to talk to him more. As he walked up, he noticed Teru looked uncomfortable after spotting him. He soon stopped in front of him.
“Hey, Teru.”
“Hey…mob.”
.
.
.
Mob went to sit, but Teru quickly got up, and mob grabbed his arm. “Hey…are you…..avoiding me? Did I do something”
He yanked away, his voice shaky. “G-god mob…why can’t we just be normal. We’re so fucking weird!” He sighed, mumbling under his breath; “…This isn’t how I should feel about you…”
“…we can be weird together…”
Tears welled in terus eyes and he clenched his fists. “You really can’t take a hint, can you, shigeo? Just leave me alone!” Then he ran off. Mob sat confused, but his chest ached and he slowly turned his head to hang low.
As of recent, pure vanilla had fallen ill. Tremendously ill. Now, pure vanilla knew very well as a healer that rest was the best thing you could do for yourself when it high water, but he was also not known for always following his own advice. He pressed on through his sickness to fulfill his duties, even when he felt as though he was on the brink of death. His workers worried, but pure vanilla insisted they stay home as to not pass it on, so despite better judgment, he was left to his own devices.
Shadow milk had noticed a surprising lack of that friendship preacher, and not that he was worried or anything—he’s the beast of deceit after all, he doesn’t worry or miss the likes of a common-dough, let alone that good for nothing half baked old stick of vanilla-but the longer he went without him, the more…skeptical, he became. Yeah, skeptical. So he headed out to his little pocket dimension.
He walked down the street and eventually made it to the big ass castle pure vanilla lived in. After yanking at the door with all his might for 5 minutes, he came to the conclusion it was locked. He slapped open a portal and walked straight into pure vanillas bedroom just to find; no pure vanilla. He grumbled and looked around, seeing only that the room was tidy. He walked around the dark, empty halls, before walking past pure vanillas study. He looked over and saw pure vanilla, hunched over, scribbling and sniffling. He walked up and curled his fingers around his shoulders.
“Hey, vanily~ I-“ he froze. And for the first time, his heart dropped and ached with worry.
Pure vanilla looked up, sick as a dog, his nose plugged, and his dough half dried out. He looked like he had not been drinking water or eating or resting, and the paperwork in front of him certainly didn’t help his case. “Oh, hey, bluebird. You really should get going, I am a little under the weather and I would not want to get you sick”
“A little under the weather?! You look two steps from crumbling!! And what are you doing? You should be in bed with soup and water!”
“Oh, no, I” he coughed into his elbow “I’m well enough to work. And I’m not hungry. Truely, blue bird, you should go home”
“Nope! Nuh uh! Not happenin! Get your little low lifes to bring you to bed now!”
“Bluebird, please calm down. And my workers are at home, I want to keep this illness contained.”
“Ughhhhhh!! You stubborn dolt!!!” He huffed, and in a moment of desperation, he swept pure vanilla off his seat and flew him back to his room.
“B-bluebird-“ he sniffled “I’m fine to work, really. And—uh—p-please, put me down”
He grumbled “Fine by me” then dropped pure vanilla into his bed
“Shadow milk, I-”
“Don’t even! I may want you to die, but not in such a weak way” he crossed his arms and turned away, mumbling as he tried to hide how obvious the lie was. “It’d hurt my reputation if the other half of my souljam was connected to someone weak enough to died of a cold. Not even that old hag of flour would die to something like that.”
“I ask-“
He whipped around “Ah ah ah!! Shh!! I can’t have you dying because you decided to overexert yourself. I will make soup, you will eat it, then you will nap. Is that clear or do I have to chain you to the bed?”
He was unamused, but nodded and pulled his blanket over him. Shadow milk smirked and walked out triumphant. After tons of noise, many cuss words, and much error, shadow milk arrived back with a hot bowl of soup, some medicine, and a lot less patients. Pure vanilla was stubborn at first, wanting to eat on his own accord despite clear exhaustion, but eventually gave up and let shadow milk feed him the soup. Shadow milk yapped, pure vanilla listened, and eventually pure vanilla fell asleep.
Shadow milk cleaned up, he sat down, and was left with a decision; stay and leave his guard down, or leave and have this all be forgotten soon. Before he could even consciously make such a decision, he had slowly gone from sitting on the edge to curled up in pure vanillas arms on the bed. As much as he hated it, he loved it, as if he were partly intoxicated to the feeling and partly angry he ever let himself get into this position in the first place—but all thought washed away as pure vanilla, while asleep, pet him on the head. It was subconscious, and weak, but repetitive enough and soft enough to wash away any thoughts.
This was the one place he could go and not think.
The one person he tried to hard to hate and couldn’t help but love.
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I know I wrote a conversation between two characters. I know what they were talking about, and how it ended, but only vaguely and never really what they actually said. like, I could tell you what hiro and chihiro talk about in stuck in the shadows or where pure vanilla and shadow milk are in an unfamiliar feeling, but I couldn't tell you exactly what I wrote.
Today hadn’t been all that much. After the recent trial—and ever since this sick killing game even started—the air in the building felt heavy. And worst of all, he didn’t have anyone. He wished he could say he didn’t need friends, that he was fine without them, but that just wasn’t true. All this swirled in his head as he headed to his dorm, the other students still talking in the cafeteria as he did so.
He looked over his shoulder just before making it to his door, but when he turned back—a slightly translucent sayaka stood in front of him. He fell back on his ass in shock and screamed like a little girl. This couldn’t be possible, she was dead!! Unless…she had unfinished business.
He scrambled up and bolted for his room before smacking into his door he forgot was closed and falling right back on his ass.
He took a deep breath to calm himself and collect his thoughts, and almost laughed, though his voice still held . “Jeez, you spooked me! Never seen a ghost before!” He said as he got back to his feet, “so, what’s…keeping you here? Aren’t you supposed to—uh—move on to the afterlife?”
Once said, the ghost looked away shamefully, as if she were stuck here much to her dismay.
“Oh,” he said with some surprise, “unfinished business? Clung on feelings?”
She nods woefully.
“Is there anything I could do to help?”
After a long moment of silence, she looked back to him with teary eyes and whispered “tell me they’re okay..”
“Who?”
“My friends!” She sobbed, putting her head in her hands. “My band mates! The only people who really knew me! I just want to know if they’re okay!”
“Oh-uh, yeah! Yeah, they’re okay!” His voice cracked a little as he was put on the spot. He never was good with comforting people—at least not in his eyes—so being put on the spot like this only made it worse.
She sniffled, “really?”
He nodded, hesitantly hovering his hands over her shoulders. “They’re alright.”
She hugged him in her finale moments on this plane of existence, before slowly fading away into dust.
He looked around and saw another that quickly scurried behind a corner. He felt his heart pounding, but if only he can speak to them and let them move on…he took a deep breath and went around the corner. There was one ghost, small, timid, and curled up at the computer labs door. A few steps closer and he recognized them as chihiro.
He slowly walked over and sat next to him. He could hear his soft cries now, and it made his heart ache. Even if he was a scaredy cat, he felt really bad when someone was crying, whether ghost or not.
“Hey…you okay, fujisaki?”
He whimpered. “None of this wouldve happened if I didn’t try to be brave.” His lip quivered, “I’m not strong or manly and I was dumb to think I could be. I should’ve stayed in my comfort zone.”
“it’s not your fault, chihiro—“
“It is. I was trying to be like mondo and look where that got me…”
“…well…I think you’re pretty strong…”
Chihiro looked up and hiro patted him on the back like a dad would, “you don’t have to be tall and muscular to be strong. Strength comes from bravery, and if I was to say who was stronger; you or mondo? I’d say mondos the weaker one, regardless of how much he can hold on the bench.”
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