Y'all want my Hoffman Headcannons? Well, you can have them! These are lightly inspired by @maybe-babey-boy and @hoffmanfucker69, the baddest babes out there
Mark Hoffman General HC's
Dedicated to his work and reputation, I mean he'll do anything to keep it up
You can always count on him. If he says hes going to do something you bet your ass hes going to do it
Always brings you some sort of present when he has the time like flowers n such
Oddly well with calming down children, but isnt all too fond of them
He can overthink things though... a lot
Thinks he knows what's best, but sometimes he just doesnt
Will call you out on your bullshit, but plays along when necessary
Sometimes he just cant take criticism
Dad Bod! Dab Bod! Has a total sweetooth for them snACKS
Daddy kink? Check. BDSM? Check.
Total book worm and nerd at home
Mark is very smart, but as he got older he used it more to his advantage to become intimidating and manipulative
Can get very territorial and jealous, but well at hiding it
Hes got a pet peeve for people talking over him/purposefully ignorning him
Hates having his time wasted
He can get a bit cocky on the down low if he succeeds
And if he really doesnt like you, hell hold it over your head
Observer, rarely talks when he isnt in an area he knows well
Caries his gun everywhere, always aware of his surroundings
Big Ol' Family Man. You're just about all he has and hes going to defend you with all his life
Hes got a drinking probably. Poor babys and alcoholic
Honestly, not a bad fighter
Loves to pick little fights with you sometimes to see you get frustrated or just to tease you
Absolutely hates being lied to or kept secrets from
But good luck keeping secrets from him, hell find out in a heartbeat. Hes a detective for christ's sake
Safe to say he isnt a fan of surprises very much
Would rather to things by himself and really never asks for help. Thinks if he asks for help it's a bit pitiful
If you're sick you ain't doin SHIT till you get better b. Hes got you
Has a tendency to just not answer you sometimes, but also has to have the last word. Hes practically impossible to read
He grinds his teeth mad hard when hes asleep AND awake
His hair is off limits baby. You know how much that hair gel costs?
On the softer side, is an expert at making you laugh and smile. You get nothing put compliments
Hes always touching you. Hes really only afraid of losing you. It's even worse if hes not there to save you
Master of playing hard to get just to piss you off
You can always tell when he enjoys getting under your skin when he sees your getting visibly irritated and that shit eating grin spreads across his face
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