the bat dorm

Dick: "Are you attempting to mimic the stereotypical diet of a 1300s serf, by chance?"

Dick: "You know. At some point in a century some historian's gonna find some interaction between the two of us and be like "they were very close friends" and half the internet equivalent at the time will be like "uh huh i'm sure" and in the meantime we were just talking about how to run a drug operation on a semi-isolated island off the coast of New Jersey."

Dick: "I occasionally get threats and proposals from the same people. It's very exciting. Tells me we're compatible."

Dick: "My house is just full of crocheted vegetables infused with stress."

Dick: "There are surely other, undiscovered types of papacy to learn of."

Dick: "That's not even a fun kind of evil pope."

Jason: "Local man discovers he has emotions for his wife. More at 10."

Dick, confused, unaware of how charisma works: "Women want to speak to me about fish trafficking."

Dick, elated: "With the right team, I can be a hit man and the Pope!"

Jason, to Dick, who has just reminded him that he is not addicted to crack: "My mental association for you with crack (targeting traffickers) is slightly closer than the one for crack (prescription)."