You'll Keep Me Moving..on..

I don’t want to see… I didn’t want to see.. No I didn’t want to see what I’ve become

Oh no.

@illkeepyoumovingon

Cosmica’s request cut through him like a knife, pale eyes widening before his expression stilled into a neutral mask that threatened to slip at any moment. 

Five simple words. 

He should have seen it coming, honestly, after all the time they’d spent together. Cosmica was a curious soul and Earth was a grand mystery she’d never gotten the pleasure (or rather displeasure) of meeting for herself. He’d told her stories, good ones! About the people and the customs. Foods. Clothing. She’d been rather curious about his tattered spacesuit for weeks before gaining the words to ask about it. 

But…

The Astronaut couldn’t go back there. He couldn’t! There was no happiness left for him. He was happiest here! Amongst the stars, sights he’d dreamed so longingly for all his life. What did Earth hold but pain and torment? Loneliness. Hurt.  Falsified admiration for those who didn’t care. 

The very thought of the planet stirred nothing but bitterness inside him. He’d left all that behind when he’d taken his seat aboard the spacecraft. He’d left that life behind when his crew had died. When he’d thought himself dead before the very space entity before him saved his life and brought warmth back to his heart. 

“Cosmica…” 

He swallowed down his negativity and tried to offer her a small smile. It looked more like a grimace but; He deserved points for trying..didn’t he? 

She tilted her head slightly, confused by the Astronaut’s reply. He had told her so many good things about Earth, of course she would want to go and see what it was like! It all seemed so interesting to her.

“I wanna go to Earth.” She insisted, and crossed her arms over her chest with a pout.

Yeah, he had told her about Earth, but that would never come close to experiencing it first-hand. Seeing the, uh, what were they again? Oh yeah! Trees! Seeing the trees, meeting more people, there was so much she could do if everything he told her was true!

Cosmica thought about his statement for a moment again. Even if Earth didn’t have anything like ‘this’ as he put it, she still wanted to at least visit the planet once for herself. Why doesn’t he understand? It was simple, she thought. She heard so many stories about interesting things on Earth, so of course she would want to go see it.

She didn’t care if they had the entire galaxy to explore, they had all the time in the universe to do that. She had wanted to visit Earth for quite some time now, but had trouble phrasing the question in her head before she asked him.

She’d never experienced the negatives. Earth must have seemed like a perfect paradise. But..it just. It wasn’t! On Earth he was nothing but a dead man. Suddenly returning would likely raise an alert if people recognized him. Not to mention--what would people make of Cosmica herself? A huge space entity. What if people tried to harm her? Tried to take her in for studying. Dissecting her in cold labs in the name of science. 

She was an alien to them after all. 

“I simply..I. It’s very risky Cosmica. What if something were to happen?” He questioned, hoping to sway her from this idea of visiting the blue and green planet. “What if we can’t return here?” 

The thought alone chilled him. He couldn’t go back to how his life had been. Couldn’t return to that. Wouldn’t return to that. He refused. But..what right did he have to deny Cosmica of the experience..? Was he really so cruel as to demand she stay away..? Even if it was meant to protect her. 

“How long did it take you to get here?”

“Scream into the void. It’s satisfying.”

“The stars are beautiful, aren’t they?”

“Being in space is pretty until you get bored of it. After that it becomes pretty terrible.”

“See that planet, far over there? I would love to go there someday.”

“No I have not mooned the moon, why would you even think of that!?”

“I haven’t seen an eclipse before… You don’t get them here.”

“In space nobody can hear you scream. That means you can yell whatever you want and not get in trouble. I admit I abuse that privilege often.”

“Space is cold, lonely, and depressing but at least I get alone time. At least until people like you show up and bother me.”

“I swear if I hear one more Uranus joke I will throw you into the sun. Literally.”

“Don’t stare at the sun it doesn’t feel good. Trust me on that.”

“How the hell did you find me!?”

when i wake up, i will have to face that fate alone.