Oh right! Bloggiversary.
I should do something for it!
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@the-scrappy-stinger
Oh right! Bloggiversary.
I should do something for it!

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(Bee wakes up mad and he's gonna TELL YOU WHY-!)
WHY IS EVERYTHING IN THIS GAME FUCKING GACHAS?!
Raid Battles are random Pokemon drops! 1% chances for Pokemon spawning depending on the WEATHER but only unseen behind a wall of overworld Pokemon that you don't want! You have to pay for the CHANCE to have a raid spawn a good Pokemon by paying with the in-game Watts currency that you win doing grinding tasks in the Wild Area! Link Trades don't let you REQUEST what Pokemon you want!!! You can't even buy your own goddamn evolution stones, you have to go pay the Watts currency to get a chance for it to drop from the digdug brothers, or send your Pokemon out to do unpaid work for the CHANCE of getting the stone you want!
Diamond and Pearl let you dig in the Under as much as you wanted for free and it was a fun minigame!
The other games just let you BUY the fucking stones!
Everything in this game feels like a fucking casino!!!
found this on reddit you know what i have to do
Trisha blinks a few times. “How did I get through the real game the first time?”
Wasp leaned over. “Probably through the power of “I got a switch at the same time’ method.”
Suffering together is suffering less.
(Suddenly, THE most damning thought crosses Bee's mind.)
I didn't sing a song once playing the real Pokemon: Sword.

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I told you it was one of the most unpopular games, I think only Brilliant Diamond/Shining Pearl has it beat, and I think that’s only cause of bugs. Not sure about Scar/Vio but I’ve heard they’ve been patching that one up
Man, it's, like, not even fun to just go walking around Pokemon catching! You're trying to, but the overworld Pokemon get in your way, and the hidden in the grass Pokemon have the weirdest spawn rates, and there's frame drops and chugs, and there's all this emphasis on curry making which means you have to stop playing the game to play a different not-as-good game. And the ROM hack spoiled me! The early game selection was so good!
And you know what keeps really fucking me up? Carkols look AWFUL in this game!
You see this rendering? They don't LOOK like this in game! In game they're SHINY and glossy and jet black and they look like their shaders are COMPLETELY different than every other Pokemon! They look WRONG!
OH right that's why I never use Pumpkaboo, I have to trade it.
(Now that Bee's OUT of the fugue, it's hard to get back in it.) I want snackies...
ask-smokescreen Primus! I remember getting that game when it came out, it was the last midnight release I ever went to. ... And I still haven't finished it, it is just SO slow.
I am so glad I didn't pay any money for this. The ROM hack was so engaging and then you play it on the Switch engine and the story TANKS because everything takes forever.
(The Switch runs out of mobile battery and Bee breaks free of the fugue.) POKEMON THOUGHTS!
WOW I haven't been this BORED playing a Pokemon game since Diamond! Everybody's SO TALKATIVE and you have to wait for animation cycles to finish and they're bad. They're SO bad at animation cycles. Y'all should play as a girl with long hair- the physics aren't even right! The brains and ponytails bounce in the WRONG DIRECTION! And the Pokemon selection is so mediocre early game! I guess they want you to really love your starter but look I tried, and getting Little Girl was pretty great and all, but these starters are SO UGLY. They're all skinny and human shaped and the Grooky line is probably the best one but even then it's REALLY boring. AND ALL THE REDUNDANCIES! Look I got a plant (Eldegoss) and a plant (Bounsweet) and a plant (Oddish) and a plant (Cottenee) and a plant? (if you picked Grooky) and a plant (Seedot, Lombre if you got Shield) and a plant (Pumpkaboo) and why are there SO MANY DIFFERENT PLANT POKEMON before you even get to the second gym?! And the Wild Area is SO FLAT and BORING and the Pokemon in it aren't even all that special!!
What is this game?!
No WONDER it was at the library! Nobody would steal this thing!
i think the near-extinction of people making fun, deep and/or unique interactive text-based browser games, projects and stories is catastrophic to the internet. i'm talking pre-itch.io era, nothing against it.
there are a lot of fun ones listed here and here but for the most part, they were made years ago and are now a dying breed. i get why. there's no money in it. factoring in the cost of web hosting and servers, it probably costs money. it's just sad that it's a dying art form.
anyway, here's some of my favorite browser-based interactive projects and games, if you're into that kind of thing. 90% of them are on the lists that i linked above.
A Better World - create an alternate history timeline
Alter Ego - abandonware birth-to-death life simulator game
Seedship - text-based game about colonizing a new planet
Sandboxels or ThisIsSand - free-falling sand physics games
Little Alchemy 2 - combine various elements to make new ones
Infinite Craft - kind of the same as Little Alchemy
ZenGM - simulate sports
Tamajoji - browser-based tamagotchi
IFDB - interactive fiction database (text adventure games)
Written Realms - more text adventure games with a user interface
The Cafe & Diner - mystery game
The New Campaign Trail - US presidential campaign game
Money Simulator - simulate financial decisions
Genesis - text-based adventure/fantasy game
Level 13 - text-based science fiction adventure game
Miniconomy - player driven economy game
Checkbox Olympics - games involving clicking checkboxes
BrantSteele.net - game show and Hunger Games simulators
Murder Games - fight to the death simulator by Orteil
Cookie Clicker - different but felt weird not including it. by Orteil.
if you're ever thinking about making a niche project that only a select number of individuals will be nerdy enough to enjoy, keep in mind i've been playing some of these games off and on for 20~ years (Alter Ego, for example). quite literally a lifetime of replayability.
since this post blew up, i've been wanting to do an addition with all of the recommendations from the comments and tags. but there's a lot of them. some people might be crazy enough to sit down and seriously put them all in one post with descriptions. those people are honestly sick in the head.
anyway, here's all of the recommendations from the reblogs. not all of them are text-based, but it's a great mixture of styles. also don't forget the links in the second paragraph of the OP which will take you to FMHY where there are a bunch more games listed.
Games
A Dark Room - text-based science fiction role-playing game.
corru.observer - science fiction adventure web game.
Improbable Island - old-school text adventure game.
Candy Box 2 - incremental clicker game that evolves into RPG.
Arcanum - open source wizard clicker game.
sandspiel, Powder Game, Powder Game 2, The Powder Toy - more sand physics games.
Orb.Farm - fishtank simulator.
Façade - experimental game with a real-time interactive narrative where you try to fix a failing marriage.
The Catacombs of Solaris - trippy art game.
Yume Nikki Online - online version of the surreal classic plus fangames.
The Barncle Goose Experiment - combine element/alchemy game based on antique theories of abiogenesis.
Fallen London - free-to-play text-based open world RPG.
Nested - very unique text-based universe expanding game. described as possibly @orteil42's favorite thing he's ever made.
The Process of Elimination - interactive web novel (by @hypertextdog)
Discworld MUD - multiplayer, text-based, online game (a MUD, or text MMORPG) based on the Discworld books.
Horse Master - surreal text game about training a horse.
EYEZMAZE - flash (RIP) or HTML5-based puzzle games.
You Are Jeff Bezos - text game. spend Jeff Bezos' fortune.
The Password Game - challenging puzzle game where you have to meet password requirements (by neal)
Universal Paperclips - incremental paperclip making game.
Half-Earth - planetary disaster planning game where you try to save the world using socialism.
ChooseYourStory - community-driven website centered on CYOA style story games.
PhD Simulator - random event based text game. make your choice each month and see if you can graduate on time.
Dungeon Crawl Stone Soup - open source roguelike.
Cataclysm: Dark Days Ahead - turn-based survival roguelike set in the modern day.
Nethack - open source roguelike originally released in 1987.
FarmRPG - simple, mobile-friendly, text-based farming RPG.
Kingdom of Loathing - browser-based community MMORPG.
PokeRogue - browser-based Pokemon roguelike
Tools
Text Game Builder - works in your browser, with just a little bit of Python (by @grumpygandalf)
Twine - great (free!) tool for making text-based games quickly.
Ink - scripting language for interactive fiction (also free)
Flashpoint Archive - a community effort to preserve games and animations from the web.
PICO-8 - fantasy console for making, sharing and playing tiny games and other computer programs.
Non-Games
Library of Babel - interactive illustration which attempts to simulate what it might be like to browse The Library of Babel.
Superbad - technically not a game, sprawling website full of secrets.
17776 - serialized speculative fiction multimedia narrative about football in the far-future. beautiful, creative, legendary. created by Jon Bois, a legend and one of my favorite writers of all time.
Choice of Games - text-based, choose-your-own-adventure games (interactive fiction). some free-to-play, others can be bought like an ebook.
The Deep Sea - scroll to the bottom of the ocean. encounter the humble squid and his friends (by neal)
Space Elevator - like The Deep Sea, but up instead of down. you can equip your avatar with a scarf (by neal)
Internet Artifacts - an interactive history of the early internet (by neal)
If The Moon Were Only One Pixel - scroll through an accurately scaled model of the universe.
r/incremental_games - reddit community for incremental games.
r/WebGames - reddit community for web games in general.
thank you to everyone who contributed and the creators. please be sure to show them some love where possible.

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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(Bee checked out Pokemon: Sword: The Real One! from the library! His priorities are... weird.)
Dottler has FOUR feet?!
Today’s Sunday.
you have to rb this on a sunday every time u see this on ur dash
I hate this one because the timing of Puffy’s weekly reblog, my work schedule, this is invariably what I am doing every time I see this post each week.
CLARISSA DICKSON WRIGHT & JENNIFER PATERSON Cooking fragomamella ("strawberry breasts") Two Fat Ladies | 3.04
“A lot of good in an old cock, isn’t there?”
— Clarissa Dickson-Wright on Two Fat Ladies.
Clarissa: “You’ll get expelled for that.”
Jennifer:“They can’t expel me because I’m too old…AND I’M LEAVING!”

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Clarissa Dickson Wright smokes a pipe in 1968
Jennifer Paterson [speaking of rabbit meat]: They have a far better taste than your average supermarket chicken.
Clarissa Dickson Wright: A board of polystyrene tastes better than the average supermarket chicken.