i wish to be able to love tirelessly.

Me reading enemies to lovers fics in 2021

Like most things about this show, its best (and for me only) lesson was unintentional. 

It was a golden opportunity, but this must have been a very stressful role for Kim Seon Ho.  And yet KSH showed that hard work and bringing your strongest self into every situation, good or bad, will make you persevere. 

In this way, Good Boy and Kim Seon Ho are the same.

Kim Seon Ho overcame about 10 episodes of strange, warped storytelling with hard work and dedication to his craft and his character.  Not with luck, not just hoping for the best, not with cosmic intervention, not by relying on solutions that just work out that way.  There was no easy solution here, especially when his screentime plummeted. But every scene of his was still a highlight. He scrutinized the material he got, finding for Ji Pyeong every chance to add and improve the story with his presence. 

The show told Ji Pyeong take what we give you and Kim Seon Ho said don’t mind if I do.  The show denied Ji Pyeong compassion and runway it saw fit to give to  other characters.  But KSH played the cards that were dealt to the best of his extensive ability and made Ji Pyeong undeniable to the audience.

And while the show refused to let us see the home run Ji Pyeong was due after a long, painful journey, I’ll say this: the show may or may not have struck out (I have my answer).  But it was delightful to see how Kim Seon Ho swung with all his might and hit a home run.

I'm full on Team Ji Pyeong and know that he deserves every good thing. If the writers stay true to what they wrote for the beginning of the show it SHOULD end with something like this but if not, at least we'll have this AU.

3 years later:

Dal Mi and Ji Pyeong have gotten closer. Maybe they're dating or they have a close relationship. Either way, we can guess that Ji Pyeong wants to take their relationship to the next level. I hope that during those 3 years Dal Mi clarified some things regarding the letters so their relationship will have a pretty strong foundation when Do San comes back (I mean I guess 15 years wasn't enough).

Do San comes back and Ji Pyeong wants to protect his relationship with Dal Mi and let's Do San know that over the past three years his relationship with Dal Mi has changed. Do San, of course doesn't like this and wants back into Dal Mi's life. So he will try to pick up with her where he left off. Dal Mi will be confused again since she decided to not work through her feelings fully and will find herself questioning who she should choose. I also think at this point she will consult the ancestors and will have her aha moment. I think Ji Pyeong will feel like he needs to respect Dal Mi's choice so he might choose to not propose and take a step back at the recommendation of his ancestor.

I think as Dal Mi and Do San work together it will seem like Do San is making progress again. But, Dal Mi has changed in the last three years. She knows how to set personal feelings aside to get the job done (like when she joined forces with In Jae). So Do San will be caught off guard when Dal Mi expresses that she has no interest in pursuing another romantic relationship with him-- hopefully she will have concrete reasons as to why. Ji Pyeong will witness this interaction from afar and decide that it's time to write Dal Mi one last letter and move on. In his letter he shares how much she has meant to him especially during that year 18 years ago. He will thank her and tell her that he wishes her well. He will drive to the bird house one last time. He will stand there holding his letter.

Back to Dal Mi, she will go to find Ji Pyeong and tell him she chose him. She'll look for him at SH, she'll call his phone, go to his apartment, and even go to her home. There she'll talk to Halmeoni about Ji Pyeong. Perhaps Halmeoni will confirm her decision and will give Dal Mi an inkling where to find Ji Pyeong.

Dal Mi shows up and finds the letter. Desperately tearing it open with tears in her eyes, she reads the words of the man who loves her but is saying goodbye. She weeps as she sees him sign it as Han Ji Pyeong and thinks she's too late but as she turns around she sees him standing there. She goes to him and this time her eyes show that he is exactly the person she wants to see. She tells him she chooses him and he questions whether or not she will regret that decision in the future. She tells him not to worry and that she's never regretted a decision in her life. As she says that they embrace and kiss--possibly as snow falls or as cherry blossoms fall. Then Future by Red Velvet plays and all of the Ji Pyeong stans are happy.

Upon Another Time

4 hours

Prismacolor colored pencils on strathmore colored pencil paper

Prints for sale on Society6

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i just submitted the ask about feeling behind. I guess to add some context I feel that way despite trying to make plans because many of my peers of my age seem to be farther ahead- I'm 25. Granted, I do know of people in my age group who are where I am or behind, but there are fewer of them and they are behind in just one thing or another and I can't help but feel upset with myself for being behind in ALL the categories.

+++

There is no “supposed to be” in regards to life.

Everyone follows their own path and takes their own time to discover what their life should be.

I know society has all these benchmarks for where you’re supposed to be but that’s false.

It’s just... false.

Yes, you CAN go down those paths and follow everyone else, sure. And maybe that’s even the right path for some people. But if that’s not your path, then that’s not your path. It’s okay to go a little slower or off on a detour or deal with some surprise disruption or recognize that you’re lost and need to do some exploring.

Not to mention, you can go down those paths and follow everyone else and be right on track and then... from out of nowhere disaster can strike and your entire, “appropriate” track is wiped out of existence. Or you can find out that track leads nowhere you want to go. Or that you need to be on a different, parallel track, or one that heads off into a completely different direction. Life is not secure. If you think you’re supposed to have already finished school and now starting upon a career and finding a marriage partner and thinking about kids and knowing what you want to do with your life. 

I mean. Maybe that’s one way to go. And that’s fine, great for those that do. BUT that path is not secure. Your industry can collapse (just think about how traditional media has fallen apart, journalists, publishers, magazine or newspaper careers are destroyed through no fault of the people who went down what they thought was a relatively secure career path.) Your partner can turn out to be a complete disaster for whatever reason. You can end up being unable to have kids or discovering that you don’t want them. You can find out that what you THOUGHT you wanted that was what you were SUPPOSED to want is absolutely not good for you, doesn’t make you happy, actually causes distress, or is just not quite the right fit.

JUST BECAUSE YOU FOLLOW THE “SUPPOSED TO” PATH DOES NOT MEAN YOU’VE GOT IT ALL FIGURED OUT OR WILL BE A SUCCESS OR HAPPY OR ANYTHING.

To me, 25 sounds awful young, although I remember being 25 and thinking my life was passing me by and I needed to do something and set out on that path just like you. And in a couple of years I DID go back and get a master’s degree, and I don’t regret that, even though that path was not EXACTLY what I kept going down, although it is connected and I’m still using what I learned 25 years later.

You’re not behind. It’s not a race. Taking time to figure out what you want to do and to get yourself set up for the next step is not falling behind. It’s preparing for your next adventure. Getting yourself ready. Getting your ducks in a row. Figuring out what you want and what you need.

Not to mention, I’d like to remind you, that we are in an UNPRECEDENTED time of upheaval and global catastrophe which limits our movements in the present and clouds our understanding of what the future might hold.

From what you say, I think what you need to do is give yourself a break, understand that you can’t do everything all at once and recognize that you are actually moving forward in your life path, even if you’re not going as fast as some people seem to be moving.

Just focus on yourself, keep your eyes of other people’s papers. You’re doing you. Also recognize that while they might SEEM to be ahead of you, you are only seeing their path from the outside. Maybe they’re “ahead” because they never stopped to think about if this is what they should be doing, because they were keeping to a timetable that didn’t exist. I remember one of my college friends getting married at about 23 because she thought that was what came next. Not too many years later she divorced him and found someone else and I told her I never thought her ex was good for her. She asked me why I didn’t tell her that, and I said that wasn’t something your college friend could tell you, it was something you had to figure out for yourself. She wanted to keep moving on that expected path and it took her off course and made life hard for her.

Don’t worry about staying on track. Worry about what is right for you right now, what is the future you want to have, what you need to learn and do and experience, and keep moving on each step as it is needed, step by step.