The Bookstore

Owner- Phone rings a demonic sound Ah damn, sorry dudes gotta take this, cousins calling, probably something about paperwork Answers phone and walks away talking in Latin

Janitor- Oh- well- thanks I'll give it a try,  but I do have to get back to cleaning. Leaves the room I'll see you later.

Owner- Taps their chin in thought as they think out loud Do I even pay her? I really can't remember

Building- I dunno dude, I'm just a god that is a bookstore.

Owner- We're both supernatural beings with no sense of time, we don't exactly care about wealth, and my lot mostly just care about power in the underworld, and you can't get much higher on the food chain than Heir to the Unholy Throne can you?

Building- I'm kinda just....a god

Owner- Pulls rug over a few feet, reveals a pentagram "Alright, it's family reunion time, don't let Karen in the store while I'm gone"

Building- okay

Owner- Is going through a box of newish books F*CK! WHO THE HELL ORDERED A BIBLE!?!

Building- it's for eating

Owner- YEAH, WELL NOW MY HAND IS BURNT

Building- delish

Owner- For f*cks sake, now I have to go heat my hand up with hell fire

Owner- Yawns Tis time for a nap, everyone can go home. Karen, I swear to all of the unholy things in this world, if you don't get your ass out of that door in 3 minutes I will make sure you leave with more than just a new book.

Janitor- just cleaning around

Kid- What exactly,, are you wearing?

Janitor- Dressed as Levi Ackerman What do you mean? Do you not like the swag?

Building- it's f*cking poggers.

Some kid asking for help on a research project

Owner- What is it you need to know about?

Kid- The COVID-19 pandemic

Owner- Oh sh*t

Building- no

Owner- Oh shush up Turns to kid Why don't you ask your parents about that sweetheart

book full of all needed information falls from the ceiling

Owner- Oh, cool, less work for me. Gives it to the kid Here you go, be careful with it though, you might want another sheet of paper or a whole notebook Whispers to walls When the f*ck did you find time to write that?

Building- I have no when, where, or how. I just am.

a purple cloud appears in the center of the dnd table

a black cloud becomes a furry black mass with green eyes

it is a cat

You hear whispers in the corners

Owner- Oh, don't mind that, it's just that the bookstore wants me to get some cats, but I'm slightly allergic, they're fighting with me about it

Building- We need feline familiars.

Owner- No, you have your rats and I have my snakes, I can't run a bookstore with my nose being clogged up everyday

Building- shakes the bookstore, five books drop on the floor.

Owner- For Satan's sake, stop being such a brat, I'll take away your girl in red privileges

Building- plays corpse husband

Building- Can we start like a book cult?