a tc blog

09/12/18:

imma just throw a whole load of updates at you guys :)

1) I turned 16 this month! Yay me(!)

2) R knows my birthday now - my brother’s birthday is v close to mine, and R also teaches him. A week after my birthday, he asked my brother how MY birthday was, which is cute.

3) I did my mocks, yes they were stressful, no the results weren’t great. I basically cried the whole of the appointments that I’d had with my teachers. I had my meeting with R, and he saw my results and I just didn’t want him to think I’m stoooooopid, (which I told him) so that made me upset. He told me I was brilliant, and then told me I was intelligent, and called me ‘my dear’ - cute :)

4) I corrected R on the way he says my name, because he’s the only one who says it differently (he says it like my mum does), which is cute but annoying now, whoops, so we’ll see if he has changed it

5) I still make the same mistakes of liking boys in my year and forget how much they annoy me, how sad (!)

23/11/18:

Honestly can’t describe how good today was, but I’ll try anyways :)

So R had organised this company (?) to come into school and give an assembly about what they do. The guy who presented it (let’s call him Beardy), was really good looking to me, he had a nice beard and everything, but my friends think I’m crazy.

Anyways, in lesson today, two of my other friends were on the other side of the room talking about the company, and one of them mentioned how Beardy looked like the moon emoji (which he really didn’t), I was laughing and apparently the whole time before R kept looking back at me from the computer he was sat on, which was directly in my eyesight.

So I defended Beardy, and said he didn’t look like the emoji, and I said kinda loud ‘And he has a..’ and touched my face where a beard would be, and my other friend is laughing, but instead she was laughing at me, because I looked over at R, and he’s BRIGHT RED, shaking his head at me and smiling because he knows what we were talking about, and he might’ve thought I was talking about him, but I don’t know why he went red 😂 he was cute though ..

So after school I had revision for R’s subject. Me and my friend were standing outside his door, and she’s not in my class but whilst he walked in the class, he asked if she would be staying and he looked cute so I laughed to myself. He was laughing back saying ‘why are you always laughing at me?’ And I said ‘Why can’t I be a happy person?’ I can’t remember what he said but we were just laughing. He walked in between my friend and I and was like apologising for being in the middle of the convo while laughing, so cute! Someone asked R what we were doing for revision, and he answered by pulling the silliest face, I literally died of laughter.

One thing I love about his revision class is that he’s so chill, and the atmosphere just makes me happy. Like we were talking about vocab I had used in my work, and it said depressed and we were joking around, and he was saying how that word is used a lot more recently, but I replied saying ‘this school depresses me’ with w smile and HE WAS SMILING WITH SUCH A CUTE FACE, I acc couldn’t handle it, G was sat next to me knowing I was dying at how cute he was.

yep I’m alive still. I’ve not been that active obviously, and I’m not really gonna apologise for it either, school is taking over my life atm and I guess there’s nothing I can do 🤷🏽‍♀️

In terms of R, things are good and he’s really sweet to me lately it’s nice. I realised a while ago I don’t like him romantically and that it’s more platonic, but I do appreciate his kindness towards me, it’s cute. He asks if I’m okay, says good luck before every test (I had tests every day this week and every day next week), asks my friends about me when I’m off sick, yeah he’s just really sweet.

So R

AND M

05/10/18:

Yesterday was a whole load of different emotions.

I had D’s lesson before R’s which I really don’t like, because it puts me in the worst mood. So I pretty much didn’t talk for most of R’s lesson, except when from when I asked R to go over a piece of my work. He made a suggestion for one of the words I used, and went over to the board to explain it to me, so I just nodded at him while he did. He did the face he always does that I could tell meant ‘you alright?’ And then he asked ‘Did you have maths today?’ And I smiled a little and nodded because he knows how much D annoys me.

I went to his revision class after school, and it was just tooooo good. It wasn’t long into the class, one of my friends told me to look at him and he was sat at his desk looking at the computer and he looked HOT, I evened messaged G even though she was sat on the other side of the room, and then I just giggled and R just raised his eyebrow and half smiled because he gets confused about why I laugh so randomly all the time. He kept making faces so my friend and I laughed, and he was like ‘You got the Mr _____ anger out of you?’ And I laughed and nodded.

I think about it now as I’m typing it, but I think he knows he’s one of my favourite teachers, I feel I’m never really angry at him in his class and also because I talk crap about other teachers to him too. But ANYWAYS,

It was a little bit later now, and I was talking to my friend. R came over to my desk, like stood over me, leaned forward on the desk with his hands, gave me eye contact the whole time, and half whispered while smiling ‘Stop talking... do your work’ SLOWLY, and I’m just looking up at him, smiling and trying to breathe, then I look into the corner of my eye and see G witnessing this and I laughed and hid my face in my blazer because I couldn’t take it but he was hotttttt in that moment.

Later on after that, he was putting on his blazer, and I can’t remember what the conversation started as, but he said something about him being ‘cool, calm and collected’, so I was like ‘Who, you?’, and he mocked me and repeated ‘Who, you?’ Back to me which was funny, so I guess it’s gonna become a thing where we mock each other so that’ll be interesting.

This teacher came in to watch us for a few minutes when R vanished somewhere, and she was trying to read what we were learning but couldn’t say it properly, and I laughed. Then R came back, and she told him about us laughing, and R was replying back to her but giving me non stop eye contact the whole time, and at one point I was like ‘Why are you looking at me?’ like he knew I laughed, and he still kept looking at me.

02/10/18:

The speaking exam went surprisingly better than I thought. I walked into the room nervous as hell, like my chest actually hurt so bad. I think he said something about waiting for my turn for the exam, because he knows how nervous I get. He was counting someone’s marks off the top of his head, and it was quite funny looking at him mess up, because I asked him why he couldn’t just use the calculator on his phone right next to him and he laughed.

Before the exam started, I was looking for my notes and I was like to him ‘Imagine if my notes weren’t here, would I still have to do it’ and he said ‘they’re all there’ like he knew I was tryna get out of it, so I replied ‘How depressing’, and he did his giggly laugh it was cute. He then said ‘I’m looking forward to it, I’m sure you’ll do really well’ and I was like ‘you just jinxed it’ and he went ‘ I’m not looking forward to it, I’m sure you’ll do really bad’ then asked if I was happy, and I said yeah and he just smiled back at me.

27/09/18:

On Thursday, I had a practice writing exam in R’s class, and the bell rang to go to our tutor classes. He was outside and I was like ‘Guess what’ to him, and he said what, and he told him my book wasn’t at home, and BOYYY the eye contact was real, and I realised again that he actually has a really nice eye colour. He was stood there for a while thinking about where my book was, and then said he’d look in his class again. We walked together towards my tutor class, and I was complaining to him about how I can’t do his subject, then he said ‘You’re one of the best in the class, your test from last year shows that, you just need to have more confidence’, which was sweet. Then he walked in my tutor room to talk to some other student, then called me and said he found my book and that it was on his desk, and winked when he walked out. So I went down to his class two lessons later, and I didn’t know he was teaching so I tried to open the door, but it was locked, so I stood outside his door waiting to ask for my book. Then he opens the door and swings his head round the edge, right where I was standing, I was too shook.

28/09/18:

Friday was really good. I was in one of my lessons, and I could hear his voice outside my door so I looked up and he was there walking past and waved at me, it was cute. Hardly anyone was in his lesson though, and it was actually really chill. I made fun of his voice a few times, and then another teacher walked in and I was like ‘Hi Miss’ and just having a convo with her and he was like ‘What, so you’re nice to her but not to me’ and kept going on about being bullied by me, it was funny.

We somehow came into the topic of last year’s class, and he brought up how he’s happier recently, which I’m high key loving at the moment. He also said that ‘at the start of last year me and him didn’t get along very well’, but OBVIOUSLY things changed, and I’m glad we get along now.

His revision after school was alright too, I wasn’t really in the mood and I walked in his class and he started saying ‘Oh no, Oh no’ and I sat down and he was like ‘What’s wrong with you lately, you’re always upset’, and I just looked up at him and didn’t say anything. It got better towards the end though, he told us what he was doing a half marathon during the weekend, and I told him about some celebrity I think looks like him, it was funny.

01/10/18:

So remember when I liked M because I thought he was hot, then I was in his class for one lesson and found out he was an idiot?

Yeah, now that’s happened with D. I thought he was nice, and we actually spoke a bit and had good conversations before he was my teacher, but tell me why when he becomes my teacher this year and turns into an idiot too?

personality > looks 10000%

26/09/18:

I haven’t had R’s lesson yet this week, but I either wave at him or he waves at me when we walk past each other so that’s nice

I asked him today for my book because I have a progress test tomorrow, and I wanted my book so I could revise. I asked if I could go to his class during tutor to get it, and when I went he wasn’t there. So I went back to my tutor room, but a different route, and I walk past D’s class, and I hear someone say my name, but it wasn’t D, it was R. He apologised for not being there because he had to cover a class, but R just told me to ask one of the other teachers after tutor.

So I had D’s lesson first, but I went down to R’s class to get my book and he was standing at the top of the corridor like he always does. Then he opens his door for me, and checks in the pile for my book and looks at me smiling and says ‘Jasmine... your book’s not here’ and I’m like ‘no way’ and he carries on looking. I was saying to him how I thought I left it there for him to mark, and he’s looking through my brother’s class’ pile of books and gets to my brother’s name and just smirks, I still can’t get over how he teaches him. He asked if I was going on residential (a weekend away with school to do intensive learning), and I said ‘No’ and he replied ‘Good’

He couldn’t find my book, and he says ‘I know you don’t lose stuff, and I don’t lose stuff either’ and I just scoffed because that’s just something he’d say. I said to him how I might’ve left my book at home because the work he wanted to mark was soooooo bad, and he was just smiling at me, then I had to go back to class so he said ‘See ya tomorrow’ and I replied ‘Bye sirrrrrrr’

20/09/18:

Just as I thought today’s lesson with R was uneventful, AFTER SCHOOL HAPPENED

Lesson today wasn’t bad, he was in a good mood but we actually did work today so he didn’t joke around as much - it was the end of lesson and and I looked at him with a straight face as a joke, and he laughed and said ‘what’s up with you?’ And I was like ‘I HATE speaking’ (I was talking about the language) and he was like ‘Not in English’ and I turned around and he had some massive grin on his face, and I acted shocked and said rude and we just laughed, things like this MESS ME UPPPPP

I had to help out after school today, for my schools evening thing - I was in the gym doing challenges with kids who came to visit and R walks in and BOYYYYY the situation was already making me nervous as hell, and he sees my friend and I and talks to my other teacher and joking about us calling us ‘double trouble’ whilst laughing, AH then he makes fun of me saying I look at him and just laugh, which is high key true but he makes me giggly I can’t help it

We finished the evening after 8:30, and the teachers had to confirm me leaving, then my Mum chooses to PICK ME UP, it was so embarrassing because I was stuck there with all the teachers. All the teachers were calling R by his nickname like I wasn’t there I WAS LIVINGGGGG. I was saying to one of the teachers how embarrassing it was being the only student there, then R jokes that he’ll go speak to my Mum and laughs about it, and it was one of those genuine laughs I could tell and he was proper giggling, it was cute.

I was waiting for ages, then my Mum pulls up outside -

Me: My Mum’s here

R: She is?

He got up, just to open and hold the door for me, it was so cute. At first I thought he was going to speak to my Mum, so I was like

Me: No WAY are you actually speaking to my Mum

R: This is the perfect time

Obviously, he was joking and he held the door and I was like ‘Noooo’, then I started walking towards the entrance, and I turn around..

Me: Byeeeeeee

R: See ya.... Period 4 tomorrow yeah?

Bear in mind, it’s pitch black outside, my mums waiting in her car, he’s still stood at the door, I’m in the middle of the pathway and we’re having a conversation...

Me: Ughhhhh. Are we doing speaking tomorrow?

R: We’ll be doing a little bit, yeah

Me: I’m not going revision then

I smiled jokingly

R: You have to go, you’re going

Me: Nope

R: You’re going, I know you’ll be there

ahhhh so much stuff has happened and it’s only been one and a half weeks but school is already eating me up alive...

13/09/18:

So I honestly can’t remember much about this day, it was a good lesson with him, and he was his usual, happy(?) self, which was nice.

14/09/18:

Last Friday was so gooooood. We had a practice fire alarm and whilst I was walking back, to my lesson he was standing next to this new teacher who is kinda good looking but anyways, I was looking at R and he looked at me, winked and nodded to say hi and said “Well done Jasmine”, ERM I was so confused, because all I did was stay silent 😂

At the beginning of the lesson, I went to up to put some paper in the bin, and he asked if I was okay, and I nodded and showed the paper in my hand. So I throw the paper in the bin, and he says “Guess who I just had?” And BOY I looked at him so confused, and he’s just smirking back at me the eye contact was INTENSE, but I didn’t know what the hell he was talking about until he said “Your brother” - yes, he now teaches him which is just gReAt.

So he was telling us the plan for the lesson, and said something about having having to speak (the language), whilst describing a photo. I had my head down, and R KNOWS I hate speaking in the language, and he goes “... which Jasmine is looking forward to” and the thing he does whilst joking about me is look away and then turn around and grin to see my reaction, and he did that and my heart HURT (in a good way) after that, it was cute.

18/09/18:

So one thing I realised is that I don’t really speak to R only in class, or to do with work, like we can have (little) conversations outside of class or not to do with work which I think is really nice. I spoke to him this morning in the canteen joking about a timetable he made for after school revision classes, he’s so smiley recently I love it.

I had his lesson first, and on my way there I tried to hide so I wouldn’t be too early but he saw me, and laughed and made a joke about me being so close to the wall, he’s random like that. When I actually came into my class, he asked about my brother and if he was okay bc he hurt himself, which I thought was sweet of him.

There was one part of the lesson where he tried to throw a piece of paper in the bin, and missed, and obviouslyyyyy I saw it so I giggled, and after picking up the paper on the floor, he looked so embarrassed, laughed and went “did you see that?” And I just nodded so I wouldn’t make him feel worse whoops.

The rest of the lesson was chill, he laughed at some things I said and at the end I was one of the last to leave and I said “Byeeeeee” and he went “See yaaaa” like that’s the second time that’s happened it was cute.

I had Geography after, and he’d walked past my class a couple of times but didn’t look into the class. I was laughing at one point and he was walking past my class, then heard me and looked into the class, directly at me and did some double take, but smiley look at the same time, and I just giggled to him. I don’t know it was funny :))

07/09/18:

I’m such a giddy mess after today, it’s quite embarrassing and G’s noticed too, so I need to stop making it so obvious BUT TODAY WAS SO GOOD

R’s lesson was after maths, and on the way there and he was stood at the top of the corridor like he always is. I tried to sneak past him but he saw me, so I had to turn around and walk back directly facing him, but he wasn’t looking at me. Then he turned his face back forward in my direction and I did a little smile to cut the awkwardness.

When I was close enough to his class/him, he did a sort of look like he remembered something and started a conversation with me; he said “well done on the work yesterday, now you’re one of the people that I think will get a 9.. I’ve seen your writing.. I think you could easily get 60/60” so I immediately said “no, no way” and he replied “Yes “, then went on to talk about how he marks harshly, and that my marks could be higher because the examiners mark generously.

I mean, it’s nice that he has high expectations of me, but i don’t like disappointing people ugh

Fast forward to later in the lesson, myself, G and our other partner were doing this speaking task. I THOUGHT once we finished, we would have to read our conversation to the class, but NO.

R said something along the lines of ‘you won’t talk in your pairs to the class, you’ll have the conversation with me and I choose Jasmine” BOY I said ‘I really don’t want toooo’ about 10 times and I kept saying “I caaaan’t” and he kept replying “you caaaan”, and I was like “Sirrrrrrr”, and he said “Jasmineeeeeee”, and it kept going back and forth like your girl was so shook but happy and G is just watching this go down. I’m thinking back to his face when he was saying this, and it was just cute UGH. Like he knows I hate speaking in front of the class, and the way he chose me so smugly, he was so cute omg.

And apparently I giggle a lot, and if it’s noticeable that’s quite embarrassing, I mean G has noticed already and we’ve only had two lessons. He’s been so nice recently, and I’m loving it tbh it makes me happy in his class