More universal experiences that prove why D&D is both the best and worst game ever
“Alright, make a perception check.” “Okay…shit. Natural 1.” “[Shrug]. Everything seems fine.”
“And…that’s a thirty-three to hit.” “YEAH, I THINK THAT HITS.”
“You all approach an underground ca—“ [The Players, in unison]: “I have darkvision.”
“Maybe it’s friendly.” “Oh my god, shut up.”
“I charge in!” “I follow!” “…[heavy sigh]. I chase after them, I guess.”
“Okay, what’s your marching order?” “…..why do you ask?” “Oh, no reason in particular.”
“I rolled a ten, plu—fuck. Minus two.” “God, why do we keep letting you roll persuasion?”
“What time is it right now?” “Around midday.” “I have Keen Mind, which means—“ “Fine, fine. It’s exactly 12:22:31. Are you happy now?”
“…….[sigh]. I’ll allow it.”
“Wait, wait, what was [NPC]’s name again?” “You don’t know. You assholes didn’t ask.”
And, of course, the timeless classic:
“Do you touch the chest?” “Uh…yeah. Wait, should I not have?” “[the DM rolling dice] It’s a little late for that now, buddy.”

















