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Being a calm, gentle, non-reactive person is really hard work, which is probably why many people are none of these things. Personally I think it’s worth it but sometimes one does want to just roll around on the floor wailing at the top of one’s lungs
People in my notes who think I’m repressed or dissociating: you will feel better when you learn emotions are not a binary of Not Feeling It vs Being Overwhelmed By It
Ok but How Do I Do That
Learn strategies for enhancing self-regulation skills, and discover the benefits of mastering this essential life skill to help emotional dy
There are many techniques (also, there are drugs)
Thank you, but do you have any advice for teens?
So my FIRST piece of information if you’re still a teen is that genuinely as you get older it will get easier to regulate your emotions. During adolescence our brains are undergoing a lot of growth and change that genuinely does make it harder to do this, on a scientific level. However, practicing emotional regulation skills can still help a lot and if you can find something that works it will make life easier going forward
This page has more information and recommendations for some basic exercises:
Discover effective strategies for teens to manage intense emotions, develop emotional awareness, and improve overall well-being. Expert tips
My body is not a temple, closest thing it's that little all-faith prayer room that they've got at airports. Sure it's small and shitty and does not even compare to anything proper, but as it currently is the only option available, best just shrug and go "fuck it, that'll have to do."
In Rimworld I was just contracted to hold onto some prisoners for someone for awhile, very normal circumstance. Except that the idiots decided to stage a prison break one day before it was time to return them and I had to violently subdue them. So my neighbours handed me three prisoners in perfect health and a week later I hand them back with shattered noses and poorly bandaged head and chest wounds like. No this wasn't my fault. We're good people we run a good prison.
I did make them sleep on sandstone slabs and eat nutrient goo but in fairness the rock slabs are to make me need to break their noses less often, and everyone here eats nutrient goo. We're good people we run a good prison.
How do the rock slabs function to decrease the totally passive need for totally passive nose breaking?
Prisoners have a prison break internal timer, and when it runs out they will attempt a prison break. The timer depends on things like how many prisoners there are, how healthy they are, and how many doors lead into the cells.
The timer only ticks down while a prisoner is awake -- it is paused while they sleep. So you can increase the amount of time before a prison break (and thus the amount of time before you have to crack them over the head with a mace until they stop moving) by making them sleep longer. This is done by giving them shitty beds made out of stone that reduces their sleep quality so they have to be in bed longer to rest up. Since prisoners only really need to be awake to eat and get brainwashed (I mean, chat companionably with the warden about which faction they should be working for and what they should believe, we're all friends here), there's no reason not to make their sleep as shitty as possible.
This is the kind and gentle way to keep prisoners contained and healthy btw. Mean players will often use the more direct and reliable "nugget pawn" method.
hi, what the hell is the nugget pawn method
Mental breaks and prison breaks don't matter if you amputate their arms and legs and leave them as a nugget with a head.
Some people just do legs, depending on what you want the prisoner for.
i was going to say it doesn't sound like you take good care of your prisoners but it seems it can always be worse
Rimworld is incredibly detailed in weirdly specific areas and incredibly basic and clumsy in weirdly specific areas and these mechanics clash in weird ways that make it... not impossible to Play Super Nice, but extremely limiting to do so. Unless you're specifically doing a Good Guy Run where you're deliberately avoiding most of the game options for personal challenge reasons, you kind of end up playing as a monster in some way or another.
I'm playing a pro human rights, pro individualist, technology-positive settlement, and stuff like the prison break mechanics are just. Fundamentally part of the game and almost impossible to avoid without extensive modding. (Avoiding taking prisoners at all except to medically treat and release them would be an example of a limitation in an aforementioned Good Guy Run.)
Once or twice I've done runs where I try to avoid breaking the Geneva conventions* and it is very hard to do so in rimworld. You need to give surviving enemies access to an alter of their ideology (impossible in vanilla), pay them (impossible in vanilla), avoid holding women in unisex cells (difficult to impossible in vanilla). And give them fancy cells, sufficient food, clothing, medical treatment etc.
It's also illegal to recruit them, you have to release them. And you can't release them normally, you have to send them back via drop pod. The only way to avoid this is to avoid taking prisoners at all, i.e. let downed enemies bleed/starve to death (which I suspect is itself a war crime but the mod doesn't consider it one so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯). And then you have to dig them individual graves, because it turns out that cremating enemies is also a war crime unless they consented while alive (impossible in vanilla).
plus there's a bunch of sensible rules about how it's illegal to turn prisoners into organ farms or enslave them or dump toxic waste near other factions or raiding non-hostile work sites or destroy their brain to make a robot that e.g. burns enemies with hellfire.
The key to a successful relationship is hitting the mutual anxiety sweet spot where you're both just a little bit scared that the other one will decide that they deserve better and leave. Just anxious enough that you gotta make sure that they know you love them and try to give them the best life that you can have together, but not anxious enough to start sabotaging shit because having good things is terrifying.
Aiming for "there's a bee inside your car while you're driving it" level of anxious, not "there's a bee inside your shirt whike you're wearing it" anxious.
listen, I know what your intent here is, and I fully agree with you, but. Specifically for ME, that metaphor is HILARIOUSLY one-sided. I'm deathly afraid of bees and wasps and would probably crash my car if this happened. My fiances keep bees and have driven entire hours with a FULL HIVE in the back of the car. I have vetoed bee journeys if I'm in the car with them lmao.
Would you feel calmer and safer with a bee inside your shirt?
I had a bee crawl down the back of my shirt once! It was very fuzzy and soft. I do get your point about the bees in the car vs your shirt but people will react differently. At least with the shirt i know where the bee is, whereas in the car it would fly around more and therefore make me panic more
Especially if I’m driving the car, i would not be able to keep my eyes on the road at all and would probably crash
it's poll time! would you rather:
have a bee in the car while you're driving
have a bee inside your shirt while you're wearing it
okay let's clarify:
I have been in a car with a bee and choose the car
I have been in a car with a bee and choose the shirt
I have had a bee inside my shirt and I choose the car
I have had a bee inside my shirt and I choose the shirt
I have had both happen to me and would rather choose the car
I have had both happen to me and would rather choose the shirt
I haven't experienced either one, but I think I'd prefer the car
I haven't experienced either one, but I think I'd prefer the shirt
No nuance because you gotta pick one. If you can't drive, in this scenario you magically can. If you can't wear a shirt, in this scenario you magically can. If you think you could think of an option that you would choose if it was available but it isn't, please write it down on a little post-it note, roll it up, and shove it up your ass. If you cannot figure out what answer to choose, ignore this post and continue on your journey without voting. Thank you for your attention.

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YOU SHAVED THEM?!?
yesterday at my outpatient therapy group my individual therapist made it clear she expects verbal participation because it’s “better for me,” conveniently deciding she knows best for me without knowing anything about the history of my voice, my vocal training, my time as a singer by trade, my vocal transition when i started testosterone, or the myriad things ive learned about my voice and its connection to my self along the way
so basically fuck her and if i decide im unable to talk again i just wont fucking go. if i have to verbally participate and she has no interest in helping me learn to move through and accommodate my limitations, then i just won’t bother. congrats dumbass now you have made me disinterested in hearing what you have to say. you have invalidated my entire experience of being someone who knows me voice while claiming that forcing myself through the pain and exhaustion is somehow fucking better for me than figuring out how to live with a communicative disability. fuck that.
so many people ive known have pushed themselves to burnout trying to deny their disabled reality, skipping accommodations, skipping rests etc. and the world convinces them that the solution to their burnout is to push even harder. it’s a huge tragedy. i know social pressures make it tough but i want more disabled people to make things easier for themselves where possible, to opt out of things that harm them when possible, to quit while they’re ahead. be that person today! protect yourself where you can! take micro breaks while doing your hobby. get that shower chair. sit to brush your teeth. lie down in the middle of the day, even if only for 5 mins. these things add up and it’s so worth it.
happy disability pride month! ACCOMMODATE YOURSELF TODAY!
my issue is that i’ve spent so much time sad and lonely and hurting that “life is full of ups and downs” does not comfort me or make sense to me in the slightest. it feels like perpetual lows. i am constantly in a hole in the dirt. i was born there. i’ve been allowed out a few times. transferred to a shallower one. but most of my time has been in Some Fucking Hole (lol) and there’s no high or up or “”good”” that makes any of that feel worth it. i rarely experience them at all. i don’t want to exist with sadness anymore at all. which is childish and selfish and, ultimately, impossible, but i’m tired. that’s been my entire life. it’s not enough to have moments of being “okay.” i am greedy and stupid and just want to exist in a way that is constantly and consistently painless. i am tired of hurting. i don’t want to anymore.
[IMAGE DESCRIPTION
Ramps should be the standard.
Automatic doors should be the standard.
Elevators in multi-story buildings should be the standard.
ASL interpreters at events should be the standard.
Braille menus at restaurants should be the standard.
Accessibility should be the standard.]
rb this version bc accessibility should be the standard

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we’re really at that point in the year where no one cares about anything huh
My psych professor mentioned swaddling in lecture so I emailed him a picture of me being swaddled in my dorm room and asked if I could get extra credit because it was really hot in there and I got really sweaty and he was like “fabulous, sure”
I’m going to miss the Honors Advisor from my university.
This is definitely my favorite email i’ve recieved from a professor, with the subject line “back at it”.
one of my all-time favorite emails
parking lots should only have disability spaces im sick of the rest of you
three tollars
the Los Angeles Ants have signed ants to a 10 year 1000000000 crumb contract
Damn, what does Los Angeles get?
getting kicked off love island for just swimming in the pool and not talking to anyone

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I follow the "leave nothing but footprints take nothing but photos" rule of state/national parks yeah because conservation. But also because when I was 11 i read a short story about a girl who went to a museum and stole a bandage flake off a mummy on display with the mentality of "im just one person one piece won't be missed" then at night she was visited by the mummy and it plucked a single hair from her head and then the next night a different mummy took another hair and she realized that there were only so many pieces to her before there would be nothing left and that story was forever wedged in my brain. Anyways leave cool rocks where you find them or the mummies will get you
New book club in town is meeting at my place. Had our first meeting tonight and someone who routinely takes stuff to the recycling centre offered to take away my broken microwave. This is fantastic I have been really pissed off by having no way to get rid of that fuckarse microwave. Unparalelled book club success.
"Okay but how did the book part go" irrelevant. Microwave is gone.