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Trying to sleep during a heatwave is a great reminder that all oil executives need to die painful painful deaths
good suggestion
My four year olds minecraft skill progress update! He’s building some badass shit in creative and it’s all getting more functional! He has played survival but does not enjoy it yet
There's this thing that I wouldn't call a distinctly autistic communication issue, but one that presents differently in autistic people and neurotypical people who just suck at communicating: assessing what someone is trying to ask when they ask a simple, seemingly straightforward question. Like if someone - a person you know is not familiar with hand-picking apples - presents you (who does know these things) with an apple with a very common abnormality, and asks you "what is this?" there are several questions they may be trying to ask.
What is this thing that I am holding?
What is this deformity called?
Is it safe for me to handle it bare-handed at all?
What do I do with it right now?
And the communication difference is that autistic people will tend to occam's razor this by assuming you mean the most simple question. That's an apple, you're holding an apple. If they point at the abnormality and clarify what is THIS that is ON the apple? You may clarify what the deformity is called by its latin name. They ask you what one should do with the apples like this? Well the ancient Phoenicians used to throw them at people whom they thought-
At this point, someone who isn't used to communicating with autistic people is likely to give up and storm off mid-sentence in order to go find someone who is capable of answering the right question from context clues. And for the sake of the example here, the next person is the second type: a neurotypical person who sucks at communicating.
You see, neurotypical people don't assume you mean to ask the most immediate and obvious question, but assess what you are trying to ask from situational context clues. The ones who suck at communicating just suck at doing this. So they may see someone approach, dangling an apple with an abnormality cautiously by the stem, and asking "what is this?"
From knowing that the asker isn't familiar with apple abnormalities, and from the way they're dangling it by the stem like they're afraid to touch it at all, the second person being asked assumes that "what is this?" means "is this dangerous to people?" And will answer "oh it's harmless :)" and won't try to assess whether there could be additional follow-up questions they could also want answers to.
So the asker who still doesn't know what to do with that thing will have to wrangle themselves through trying to guess how to get the right answer to the question they were trying to ask, which is easiest to do by suggesting the answer that is probably wrong but the only one that feels plausible.
"So do I just put this in the same basket with the other apples, like it's a normal apple?"
"Oh my god of course not. Don't let it touch any of the other ones. You have to toss it, or it will ruin the whole harvest."
Ah but you see, I have a strategy
The strategy is to answer all the questions at the same time while giving all the context
“Thats an apple with (name of the common abnormality and short description of what it does and how it forms and any consequences of eating it) its ok if you just touch it, Phoenicians used to throw them at people. but dont let it touch the other apples or it will ruin the whole harvest. I learned that the hard way (story time)”
Some say this is annoying, I think it’s a strategic way to avoid guessing games
That's probably the best option. Just try to give the answers one at a time, in order of "most important to know right now" to "least important to know in this immediate minute" and not like. alphabetically. Or all simultaneously on top of each other. Complete one sentence before you start the next one.
I will either answer "an apple?" like a question, meaning "please clarify".
Or. Just stare at them while I run through the possible meanings. After about 10-30 seconds, they will provide some sort of extra information.
The fun part is that this is just as difficult and frustrating to navigate from the other side. It's hard to verbally explain to someone how to do something that you just know how to do intuitively.
Imagine trying to explain how to breathe to someone who doesn't know how, has never known how, knows all the muscle groups and individual muscles by their latin names, but isn't aware which exact muscles you're supposed to move and to which direction, in order to make air to in and air go out. And they're panicking right in front of you because they are going to suffocate and die unless you unlock the exact correct answer in the perfectly worded order RIGHT NOW.
I think people should just ask the proper question they want answered in the first place.
Do you have any idea how different the world would look like if "just perform everything perfectly with peak efficiency, no flaws and no mistakes" was an option that's always available.
I think there's an extreme difference between Maximum Efficiency and just asking a slightly more complex question.
For example, instead of asking "what is this" the apple holder can ask "this apple looks weird, do I put it with the others?"
See how easy that is? To ask more specifically than "what is this?" How much clearer it is?
Why does there need to be addee vagueness?? Why is it supposedly "no flaws or mistakes ever" when the process is *deliberately* slowed and worsened?
Ngl homunculus I think you sound like you're trying to argue for the neurotypical side of things
That's the core of the problem: for allistic people, the vague open-ended question is the most efficient way of asking, as it has the most wiggle room for the other person to assess what is the most important question to answer. By asking "what is this?" while presenting what appears to be a weird apple, the other person has space to answer "this is a weird apple with a specific flaw", but there's space to answer a different question, for example "that's not an apple, that's a really fucked-up looking tennis ball."
It's like putting on an item of clothing. A big loose shirt can fit many people even if it isn't a perfect fit, but having to answer an extremely specific question ("what is the right way to handle this apple that I am currently holding in my hand?") with a completely different answer ("that's a tennis ball") is like having someone toss you a shirt and you try to put it on without realising that it's actually a pair of skinny jeans.
I'm trying to argue from the allistic side of things because I'm still somewhat sure that I'm the only one in my family that isn't on the spectrum. I got tested for it multiple times and didn't have it. I'm the only one in the family who was tested for it at any point.
i don't think this is a good argument.
"this apple looks weird, do i put it with the others?" could just as well be answered with "no, because that's not an apple, that's a really fucked up looking tennis ball". if the point of asking a question is getting a useful answer, then leaving room for the other person to guess your question incorrectly and answer a completely unrelated question is just wasting everyone's time. which you yourself clearly demonstrated in your example scenario in the first post.
(if you don't actually know what question you're trying to get answered, then your first task is figuring that out, rather than making someone else play guessing games with you.)
i also disagree with your point in general. there's a reason that emergency personnel are trained to ask very specific questions and be very clear in their communication, and it's because it is just objectively more effective and reliable.
clear communication is a skill, just like any other, and one which is worth practicing.
The fact they have to be trained to do that, instead of simply doing so intuitively, was kind of partially the point I was making. People don't just naturally communicate in the most objectively effective and reliable way possible. Allistic people can be taught to speak, but it still requires teaching.
all communication is leaned. kids generally communicate very directly, regardless of neurotype, and all the vague indirect stuff comes in later depending on culture etc. for allistic people who've been raised in an environment where clear communication is the norm, it probably does feel intuitive.
of course if you've learned to be indirect, then unlearning that as an adult is gonna take work. if you've learned to be so indirect that you just fail to communicate anything useful, like your example person who can't figure out how to ask "hey what's up with this apple and can i put it with the others?" then unlearning that should probably be a pretty high priority.
at the end of the day, in your original post, the communication issue isn't caused by either of the people answering the questions, autistic or allistic, but by the asker who is failing to give the others enough information to be useful. so the one who is bad at communicating is actually the asker.
also, sidenote, but you can absolutely be tested for autism several times and get a negative result every time and still be very much autistic. the questionnaires are notoriously terribly worded specifically in such a way that it trips up autistic people and gives false negative results, and psychologists or whatever are often even worse. you can look up autistic people explaining what the questions actually mean and how you're actually supposed to answer them, the difference is wild.
I thought that they're worded like that on purpose specifically for that reason. That they can tell you're autistic when you can't tell what the question is supposed to ask, the same way that those colour blindness dot tests can tell you're colourblind when you can't tell what the number in the bubbles is supposed to be.

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I call him Amtrak cause he rails me every night and he’s poorly funded by the United States government
Can I get uhhhh one dreamy boi pls
Orthopteran spotted!

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immediately skeptical. everyone knows that the food has to be shit.
freddy’s is gross and sticky and grimy. they leave food lying out at room temperature for hours only to microwave it and sell it as fresh.
there needs to be a subtle but unmistakable and unplaceable scent the second you walk in there.
i’ve decided i’m gonna go when they announce its closure. it’ll be at its best when it’s all falling apart
new top contender
you will look at my one painting. it’s 1914
if i were a respected british actor with any principles at all i would simply not agree to a project whose earnings will have material consequences for trans people but maybe i'm built differently
another one bites the dust
List of other people who also suck for this reason:
Bill Nighy
Hugh Laurie
James McAvoy
John Lithgow
Katherine Parkinson
Keira Knightley
Kit Harrington
Leo Woodall
Mackenzie Crook
Mathew MacFadyen
Matt Berry
Nick Frost
Paul Whitehouse
Peter Serafinowicz
Riz Ahmed
Shirley Bassey
Simon Armitage
Simon Pegg
Stephen Fry
Stephen Mangan
Warwick Davis
Black Mirror director Ally Pankiw rejected an opportunity to work on HBO's Harry Potter series because of J.K. Rowling's views on gender.
"It simply is this easy to say no to funding transphobia"
for ten years there were letsplayers who would record video content of themselves playing videogames and edit it down into 10-20 minute videos which they would post on youtube and other video hosting websites, but mostly youtube. now we only wake up in a desecrated field choked with a miasmatic fog and columns of graves that stretches beyond the horizon

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my publisher: Good morning! Huh did you advertise for the pre-sale yesterday? Because we launched twelve hours ago and we already made sales!
me: yeah, i posted on tumblr
publisher: .........tumblr?
me: that's where the gays are.
(link to Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a sapphic western)
update
publisher: And what is your marketing strategy on... tumblr?
me: idk, i shitpost at 2am?
publisher: .....and it works?
me: depends on what the gays find funny at that point in time.
publisher: Could I have a link to your tumblr?
me: .......absolutely not.
(link to Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a sapphic western where 50 year old women kiss and murder)
update!
publisher: I've been looking into tumblr, have you thought of using Blaze to promote your book?
me: NO
publisher: But it seems like an efficient way to get this in front of more eyes-
me: people on tumblr hate Blaze.
publisher: There is no algorithm and you can't pay to promote a post? I don't understand how anyone advertises anything on tumblr.
me: That's the best part. They don't. They can't.
(trying to make him understand that we do not control the attention. We just have to show something shiny and gay enough and if people are interested, they'll reblog.)
(Mrs. Victoria buys a brothel, a deconstruction of the colonialist cowboy mythos dressed up as a sapphic romance.)
I like when Pheidole ants do the thing with the head
I was curious about how accurate this is and am pleased to report it is extremely accurate
@animals-with-fan-art