Texts from Castlevania

(708): I'm lost and stupid without you.

(306): Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.

(518): I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit

I gotchu fam

(413): Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.

(651): It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.

(905): Sonia carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her

(360): A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".

(231): Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.

(314): The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch guy

The purpose of this post is to say that, like with S2, all things related to season 3 will be tagged with “CVTV S3” for the next few weeks. Blacklist for a temporary spoiler-free experience.

(716): I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.

(516): I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love

(770): Alucard about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.

(602): It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.

I broke up with my Netflix password source, so be patient while I figure out how to watch this for you guys. In the meantime...hi, any new fans who find this blog! Enjoy the vast wealth of CV content before 2020.