Been watching MTV's 16 and Pregnant for tips on being a dad. Seems like a pretty chill gig, actually.

if i look back, i am lost
Not today Justin
we're not kids anymore.
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trying on a metaphor

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"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
i don't do bad sauce passes

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@tesslerdavis
Been watching MTV's 16 and Pregnant for tips on being a dad. Seems like a pretty chill gig, actually.

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Teaching here is all about goodwill management.
Diplomacy is saying things is such a way as to give yourself the largest number of things to say next before having to shoot cannons.
The jiu jitsu diet is where you lose weight by avoiding shitty foods because they make you slow and easy to choke.

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Twice this week the cellphone alarm was loud enough to wake the kid and the resulting kicks were strong enough to wake the wife.
Peer reviewed means "I don't see any glaring errors in how you reached your claims." It doesn't mean "I have reproduced your results." And that's why everyone rolls their eyes, dude. That's why.
I have so much work to do that I managed to spend the last three hours avoiding my work by doing other and also very real work.
The pressure of being the kind of person you hope your kid becomes.
Recent developments:
My beard beats all of your beards. But summer is coming and it’s going to be too darn hot to have a beard. So, I’ll be clean-shaven started tomorrow. On a side note: fuck you, Duck Dynasty, for ruining beards for at least the next two years.

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I've been thinking about the differences between authenticity and legitimacy and the changes brought about in my life by no longer searching for the first but instead striving for the latter.
From Jeff Wise’s book Extreme Fear
Awesome sandwich with humas and baby spinach and chicken and cheese on some really nice wheat bread. Just outside the frame, an ice-cold Coke.
Best name for a werewolf: Lewis Pine.

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Grammar is like any organized religion. Comes from a bunch of different, many times conflicting, sources, but gets treated like its from some high and infaluable source. Confusing rules that don't make sense, but people follow them anyway. A lot of authority comes not from any kind of appeal to logic but tradition. What is considered heresy gets called tradition within a few generations.
Snow.