terebinthus

disclaimer here

閉じた二つの瞳 (Two Eyes Closed)

あの子のことが分からない (ano ko no koto ga wakaranai) (I don't understand anything about her.)

心の壁が (kokoro no kabe ga) (The impenetrable walls of her heart)

厚く大きく目の前で (atsuku ookiku me no mae de) (Tower right before my eyes,)

私を拒む (watashi wo kobamu) (Rejecting me)

心の声が (kokoro no koe ga) (The voice of her heart…)

あの子と私二人の (ano ko to watashi futari no) (Her and myself, the two of us…)

忌まわしき記憶 (imawashiki kioku) (…and our horrible memories)

世界と違う力を身につけ (sekai to chigau chikara wo mi ni tsuke) (We acquired an ability that differed from the rest of the world)

私たちは嫌われてきた (watashitachi wa kirawaretekita) (And so, they started to despise us.)

それでも不安になるの (soredemo fuan ni naru no) (But even so, we were worried…)

心が見えない世界を受け入れること (kokoro ga mienai sekai wo ukeireru koto) (…About our hearts that see and hear an invisible world.)

あの子の声を聞いてない (ano ko no koe wo kiitenai) (I don’t even hear her anymore)

心の壁を (kokoro no kabe wo) (Breaking my way through the walls of her heart,)

私が立てていたから (watashi ga tateteita kara) (I finally heard her voice after the longest time…)

久々に声を聞きたくなった (hisabisa ni koe wo kikitakunatta) (…And I wish I never had.)

「おねえちゃん」 ("oneechan") ("Sis,")

「ひとのこころって、　よくわかんないものなんだね」 ("hito no kokoro tte, yoku wakannai mono nanda ne") ("I guess I couldn't really understand how people thought and felt, huh?) [1]

「ひとのこころって、わかんない方がわかるんだね」 ("hito no kokoro tte, wakannai hou ga wakarunda ne") ("Maybe it's better if I don't understand them!")

「ひとのこころって、わかんない方がこころ開いてくれるんだね」 ("hito no kokoro tte, wakannai hou ga kokoro hiraitekurerunda ne") ("It's better than you prying my heart open, you know.")

「ふしぎだね」 ("fushigi da ne") ("It's amazing!")

世界に拒まれたと感じた (sekai ni kobamareta to kanjita) (I felt rejected from the world,)

違うの私が拒んだだけ (chigau no watashi ga kobanda dake) (But rather it was only I who rejected it)

私もこの赤い目を閉じれば (watashi mo kono akai me wo tojireba) (If were to also close these red eyes of mine,)

この子の心に触れられるかしら (kono ko no kokoro ni furerareru kashira) (Then would I be able to find her heart again?) [2]

_________

醒めない (I won't wake up)

disclaimer here

[1] These lyrics were very graciously transcribed by ear by Touhouwiki User KellamYoshikage. However, I heard a few things differently and have altered it--just small things. (た instead of て, etc)

[2] I think 分け合った血 means blood relative, so the "you" of this song is a blood relative of the speaker. I decided to go with “Sister,” because of the context, but it is gender neutral.

______

夕暮れのカラス

(yuugure no karasu)

(The crows at dusk,)

夏の通り雨

(natsu no tooriame)

(The summer showers;)

不意に思い出して

(fui ni omoidashite)

(The memories suddenly flashed by my eyes,)

すぐに忘れたんだ

(sugu ni wasuretanda)

(And then I forgot all of them)

野良猫の寝顔

(noraneko no negao)

(The face of a sleeping stray cat,)

路地裏の音色

(rojiura no neiro)

(The sound of the backstreet alleys;)

通り過ぎてゆく

(toorisugiteyuku)

(Everything around me, what everyone does)

誰かの営み

(dareka no itonami)

(Is passing right by me)

不意の胸騒ぎ

(fui no munasawagi)

(A sudden bad feeling)

漣のように

(sasanami no you ni)

(Ripples out like a wave)

寄せては返して

(yosete wa kaeshite)

(It breaches the shore and immediately retreats;)

いつも空騒ぎ

(itsumo karasawagi)

(Always making a big deal out of nothing)

瞼の縫い目が解れたら

(mabuta no nui me ga hotsuretara)

(If the stitches sewing my eye closed would ever come loose,)

光がこぼれてしまうから

(hikari ga koboreteshimau kara)

(It would be because of the light shining into it)

小さな隙間が増えたなら

(chiisana sukima ga fueta nara)

(If only these stitches loosened up a little more...)

瞳を閉じても見えるから

(hitomi wo tojitemo mieru kara) [1]

(...So I could still see with my eyes closed)

気付いてほしかった

(kidzuitehoshikatta)

(I wanted them to notice me)

誰も見てなかった

(daremo mitenakatta)

(But nobody saw)

結んで開いて

(musunde hiraite)

(I opened my stitches up just a little bit,)

固く締めなおした

(kataku shimenaoshita) [1]

(And sewed my eye shut even tighter than before)

追いかけた後ろ姿は 知らない誰かの残像だ

(oikaketa ushirosugata wa shiranai dareka no zanzou da)

(The figure I was chasing after is the afterimage of someone I don't recognize)

近づくほどに離れてゆく

(chikadzuku hodo ni hanareteyuku)

(As we draw closer, we start to separate...)

結んだ糸も解けてゆく

(musunda ito mo hodoketeyuku)

(...And my stitches start to open)

知らない世界のどこかで 目隠しのまま探している

(shiranai sekai no doko ka de mekakushi no mama sagashiteiru)

(Somewhere in this unknown world,

I'm searching with my eyes still blindfolded)

失ったのはほかでもない

(ushinatta no wa hoka demo nai)

(There's only one thing I could have lost;)

私の心によく似てる

(watashi no kokoro ni yoku niteru)

(I lost something just like my heart.)

離れてゆくほどになぜか

(hanareteyuku hodo ni naze ka)

(I don't know why, but for some reason...)

分け合った血が叫んでいる

(wakeatta chi ga sakendeiru)

(...My sister is screaming louder and louder as we drift apart) [2]

追いかけたのはあなただった 誰かではなく、あなただった

(oikaketa no wa anata datta dareka de wa naku, anata datta)

(The person I was chasing after was you.

It wasn't just someone, it was you.)

小さな世界のどこかで 今でもずっと叫んでいる

(chiisana sekai no doko ka de ima demo zutto sakendeiru)

(Somewhere in this small world,

even now, you are always screaming)

無意識の淵で待っている

(muishiki no fuchi de matteiru)

(Within the depths of the subconscious, you're waiting for me)

握り返す手を待っている

(nigirikaesu te wo matteiru)

(Waiting for me to grab your hand back)

瞳を閉じても見えるもの

(hitomi wo tojitemo mieru mono)

(All that I can see, even with my eyes closed;)

瞼の縫い目が解けても

(mabuta no nui me ga hodoketemo)

(Even if the stitches sewing my eye closed do open up,)

光がこぼれてしまうから

(hikari ga koboreteshimau kara)

(Because the light will shine into them,)

どれだけ瞼を開いても　醒めない

(doredake mabuta wo hiraitemo samenai)

disclaimer here

_____

幸せってどこにあるんだろう？

(shiawase tte doko ni arundarou?)

(I wonder where happiness might be?)

思い浮かぶ美味しいごはん

(omoiukabu oishii gohan)

(A tasty lunch comes to my mind)

悩んで迷ってもお腹が空くし

(nayande mayottemo onaka ga suku shi)

(Even if I'm worried and confused about what tomorrow will be like...)

明日のことなんて分からない

(ashita no koto nante wakaranai)

(...There's no way I can figure it out if I'm still hungry)

遊んで眠って笑っていたい

(asonde nemutte waratteitai)

(I want to play, nap, and laugh today,)

今日もいつまでも

(kyou mo itsumademo)

(Forever and ever)

何度も生まれ変わるとしても

(nandomo umarekawaru to shitemo)

(If I was born over and over again,)

また「私に生まれたい」

(mata "watashi ni umaretai")

(I'd still just want to be me.)

大好きなあなたと大好きな場所

(daisukina anata to daisukina basho)

(It's because I love you and this place,)

いつでも心は満たされるの

(itsudemo kokoro wa michitasareru no)

(And my heart is always satisfied)

泣いた数だけ強くなれる

(naita kazu dake tsuyoku nareru)

(I've gotten stronger with each time I've cried)

笑顔の数だけきっと

(egao no kazu dake kitto)

(And I've definitely smiled that many times as well)

幸せがくると信じているから

(shiawase ga kuru to shinjiteiru kara)

(Because I know for sure that happiness is coming,)

この手を離さずそばにいて

(kono te wo hanasazu ni soba ni ite)

(Stay right by my side and don't let go of my hand.)

見上げれば満点の星

(miagereba manten no hoshi)

(When we look up, the sky is perfectly filled with stars)

流れ星に願いを込めて

(nagareboshi ni negai wo komete)

(Make a wish on one of them!)

何が起きようともあなたがいれば

(nani ga okiyou to mo anata ga ireba)

(No matter what happens, if you're here with me,)

何も恐れないでいられる

(nanimo osorenaideirareru)

(Then there's no way I'll be afraid.)

夢も希望も未来も全部

(yume mo kibou mo mirai mo zenbu)

(My dreams, hopes, the future, everything--)

ずっと輝いて

(zutto kagayaite)

(It will always shine)

何度も生まれ変わるとしても

(nandomo umarekawaru to shitemo)

(If I was born over and over again,)

また「私に生まれたい」

(mata "watashi ni umaretai")

(I'd still just want to be me.)

大好きなあなたと大好きな場所

(daisukina anata to daisukina basho)

(It's because I love you and this place,)

いつでも心は満たされるの

(itsudemo kokoro wa michitasareru no)

(And my heart is always satisfied)

泣いた数だけ強くなれる

(naita kazu dake tsuyoku nareru)

(I've gotten stronger with each time I've cried)

笑顔の数だけきっと

(egao no kazu dake kitto)

(And I've definitely smiled that many times as well)

幸せがくると信じているから

(shiawase ga kuru to shinjiteiru kara)

(Because I know for sure that happiness is coming,)

この手を離さずそばにいて

(kono te wo hanasazu ni soba ni ite)

(Stay right by my side and don't let go of my hand.)

繋いで握って離さないでね

(tsunaide nigitte hanasanaide ne)

(Take my hand, hold on, and don't let go!)

見てたいすぐそばで

(mitetai sugusoba de)

(I want to see you, right by my side)

何度も生まれ変わるとしても

(nandomo umarekawaru to shitemo)

(If I was born over and over again,)

また「私に生まれたい」

(mata "watashi ni umaretai")

(I'd still just want to be me.)

大好きなあなたと大好きな場所

(daisukina anata to daisukina basho)

(It's because I love you and this place,)

いつでも心は満たされるの

(itsudemo kokoro wa michitasareru no)

(And my heart is always satisfied)

泣いた数だけ強くなれる

(naita kazu dake tsuyoku nareru)

(I've gotten stronger with each time I've cried)

笑顔の数だけきっと

(egao no kazu dake kitto)

(And I've definitely smiled that many times as well)

幸せがくると信じているから

(shiawase ga kuru to shinjiteiru kara)

(Because I know for sure that happiness is coming,)

この手を離さずそばにいて

(kono te wo hanasazu ni soba ni ite)

涙と嘘で 彩られた 哀しさに 踊る 夢に

(namida to uso de irodorareta kanashisa ni odoru yume ni)

Stained with tears and lies by my misery, I dance within a dream

また 君と世界を 繋ぎ止める"ID"

(mata kimi to sekai wo tsunagitomeru "ID")

Once again, you and this world are tied together by the "ID"

君が 君らしく 在るために

(kimi ga kimi rashiku aru tame ni)

So that you can truly be yourself

言葉 足りず また何か傷つけた まま

(kotoba tarizu mata nanika kizutsuketa mama)

As I hurt something again, unable to say the right words,

目隠ししたまま 空に羽ばたいて

(mekakushi shita mama sora ni habataite)

I kept my blindfold on and soared into the sky

落ちては 泣いてた あの日 思い出した

(ochite wa naiteta ano hi omoidashita)

As I fell downwards, I remembered that day and cried

誰が 誰で 記号じゃなく 心で 伝えてくれてたら

(dare ga dare de kigou janaku kokoro de tsutaetekuretetara)

If who someone is was conveyed to me, not through symbols, but through the heart,

この眼に 映る 景色の色

(kono me ni utsuru keshiki no iro)

Then I wonder if I could have smiled...

濁らず 笑っていられたのかな

(nigorazu waratteirareta no kana)

...Without corrupting the colors of the scenery reflected inside of my eyes?

閉じる世界 告げるirony

(tojiru sekai tsugeru irony)

(A closing world, a revealing irony)

望めば望むほどに遠ざかる あの日の夢

(nozomeba nozomu hodo ni toozakaru ano hi no yume)

The more I wish for it, the more it fades away—the dream of that day

鮮やかなimitation 閉じ込めたflame

(azayakana imitation tojikometa flame)

(A vivid imitation and imprisoned flame)

迷い込んだ 世界を覗けば

(mayoikonda sekai wo nozokeba)

If I peek into the hidden-away, lost world

無意識のevolution it's the third eye in the flame

(muishiki no evolution it's the third eye in the flame)

(Unconscious evolution; it's the third eye in the flame)

幻が 夢らしく 在る 迷路

(yume ga yume rashiku aru meiro)

Then this illusion will be a dream-like maze

揺れ動くdistortion make some noise like a braze

(yureugoku distortion make some noise like a braze)

(A trembling distortion, make some noise like a blaze)

例え どんな 世界であっても

(tatoe donna sekai de attemo)

No matter what sort of world it might be,

君と世界を 繋ぎ止める"ID"

(kimi to sekai wo tsunagitomeru "ID")

You and this world are tied together by the "ID"

君が君らしく 在るための"ID"

(kimi ga kimi rashiku aru tame no "ID")

You can be your true self because of the "ID"

想い 足りず また何か置き去りのまま

(omoi tarizu mata nani ga okizari no mama)

As I abandoned something yet again, lacking enough hope,

急ぎすぎたまま 空に

(izogi sugita mama sora ni)

I hurried through the skies

怯えては 笑顔で

(obiete wa egao de)

I smiled, but I was terrified...

泣いてた あの日 夢のような

(naiteta ano hi yume no you na)

...And cried, just like the dream I had of that day

そっと 触れて 痛みじゃなく 希望で

(sotto furete itami janaku kibou de)

By feeling not pain, but instead a gentle hope;

照らしてくれてたら この眼に 沁みる

(terashitekuretetara kono me ni shimiru)

If I was bathed in a light that would shine into my eye,

優しささえ 無くさず 笑っていられたのかな

(yasashisa sae nakusazu waratteirareta no kana)

Then I wonder if I could've laughed without losing such a nice feeling?

揺れる視界 刺さるirony

(yureru shikai sasaru irony)

(A flickering vision, a stabbing irony)

願えば願うほどに歪んでく あの日の嘘

(negaeba negau hodo ni yugandeku ano hi no yume)

The more I want it, the more it starts to distort—the lie of that day

見透かしたdomination 嘲笑うelarm

(misukashita domination azawarau elarm)

(An uncovered domination and a sneering alarm)

色の消えた 世界に沈めた

(iro no kieta sekai ni shizumeta)

I sunk it into this colorless world;

無意識の resolution in the third eye is a FAKE

(muishiki no resolution in the third eye is a FAKE)

(Unconscious resolution in the third eye is a FAKE)

嘘が 夢らしく 在る 焔

(yume ga yume rashiku aru honoo)

The dream-like blaze of that lie

溢れる imagination pushing wasted "reverse"

(afureru imagination pushing wasted "reverse")

(Overflowing imagination; pushing, wasted, "reverse")

例え どんな 答えであっても

(tatoe donna kotae de attemo)

No matter what you say in response,

君の心を 繋ぎ止める"ID"

(kimi no kokoro wo tsunagitomeru "ID")

Your heart is tied together by the "ID"

全ては 等しく刻まれた"lD"

(subete wa hitoshiku kizumareta "ID")

Every single thing was shredded into pieces by the "ID"

閉じた瞼 消えるegoに

(tojita mabuta kieru ego ni)

(My closed eyes disappear inside of my Ego)

閉じた心 揺れるlDに

(tojita kokoro yureru ido ni)

(My closed heart trembles inside of my Id)

抱きしめて 震えてる その記憶に

(dakishimete furueteru sono kioku ni)

Embraced by these flickering memories,

刻み込んだ 痛みを愛せば

(kizamikonda itami wo aiseba)

(If you truly love such a deep pain...)

無意識を包み込む 暖かい光

(muishiki wo tsutsumikomu atatakai hikari)

A warm light will envelop the subconscious

溢れてゆく 君が望めば

(kobareteyuku kimi ga nozomeba)

(If you, on the brink of tears, desire it…)

静かに揺らめいた 心は花

(shizuka ni yurameita kokoro wa hana)

The heart that silently wavered is a flower

そっと香る 懐かしい涙は

(sotto kaoru natsukashii namida wa)

(Then your sweet tears that I miss so much...)

君と世界を繋ぎ止める愛に

(kimi to sekai wo tsunagitomeru ai ni)

...Will silently transform even your very form

静かに形を変えるまで

(shizuka ni katachi wo kaeru made)

Into the love that ties you and this world together

鮮やかなimitation 閉じ込めたflame

(azayakana imitation tojikometa flame)

(A vivid imitation and imprisoned flame)

迷い込んだ 世界を覗けば

(mayoikonda sekai wo nozokeba)

If I peek into the hidden-away, lost world

無意識のevolution it's the third eye in the flame

(muishiki no evolution it's the third eye in the flame)

(Unconscious evolution; it's the third eye in the flame)

幻が 夢らしく 在る 迷路

(yume ga yume rashiku aru meiro)

Then this illusion will be a dream-like maze

揺れ動くdistortion make some noise like a braze

(yureugoku distortion make some noise like a braze)

(A trembling distortion, make some noise like a blaze)

例え どんな 世界であっても

(tatoe donna sekai de attemo)

No matter what sort of world it might be,

君と世界を 繋ぎ止める"ID"

(kimi to sekai wo tsunagitomeru "ID")

You and this world are tied together by the "ID"

君が君らしく 在るための"ID"

(kimi ga kimi rashiku aru tame no "ID")

You can be your true self because of the "ID"

(Useless words, a trembling third eye.) (A useless heart, a feeling third eye) [1]

今も 胸に残ってる 歌は まだ

(ima mo mune ni nokotteru uta wa mada)

Even now, this song still remains in my chest

(In this endless night, a trembling third eye.) (Your Id is a laughing third eye)

(Useless words, a trembling third eye.) (A useless heart, a feeling third eye)

ここで カに変わってく

(koko de chikara ni kawatteku)

Here, it begins to turn into strength

(In this endless night, a trembling third eye.) (Your Id, the Id that shreds all into pieces)

繋いだ この手は離さないから

(tsunaida kono te wa hanasanai kara)

Because I'll never let go of your hand

________

notes here, disclaimer here

[1] A chorus in the background begins at this point. Transcribed by “non-jl7ze” on youtube. I decided to separate them because I couldn’t figure out how to format it right:

（足りない言葉　揺れる third eye) （足りない心　触れる third eye) (tarinai kotoba yureru third eye) (tarinai kokoro fureru third eye) (Useless words, a trembling third eye) (A useless heart, a feeling third eye)

明けない夜に　揺れる third eye) (君のIDが笑う third eye) (akenai yoru ni yureru third eye) (kimi no ido ga warau third eye) (In this endless night, a trembling third eye) (Your Id is a laughing third eye)