Tenly Loupe

Dear Cali,

I know That this world can be cruel, that it can seem like a dark judgemental place. I know that there will be things in this life you don’t understand. Tears you’ll shed, that I can’t stop, and pain you’ll feel that I can’t heal. I promise you this! I will ALWAYS be an ear for you to share things with! Even the hard things. I’ll be the last person to judge you for your mistakes. I’ll spend everyday making sure you know how special! And important you are! We can cry together and laugh together. I want you to know that Beauty is something that comes from within and then outward. That having a kind heart and giving is extremely important! We can’t assume our loved ones know we love them, we can’t watch as people suffer, and we can’t go living our lives with words unsaid and acts undone. The world needs more love and I will spend every moment I can showing you how to Light this world up with your Big heart. I want you to learn how to feel all your feelings to the fullest and to work them out in a way that will make you happy! I don’t want you to be afraid of the hard things in life. I want to teach you to be strong! To fight for what’s right and to always believe in yourself! I’m going to protect you and keep you safe always! You’ll see love in a way that most people don’t! I’m so happy that I can share with you what a relationship should look like. I’m so happy that you get to have the dad I never will know! You have the best kind of dad there is! The kind of dad that helps you marry the right kind of guy one day! The kind of dad you’ll be able to tell everything to! The kind of dad that’ll be your BestFriend, protector and safe place! As for me I never thought I’d have a daughter and honestly I’m scared at times, I don’t want to fail you! I don’t want to let you down. And I’ll work damn hard to make sure I fix the things I do wrong, just like with your brothers. I’ll tell you this Being pregnant with you I’ve realized that my hearts needed yours and I didn’t even know it. You’re healing missing pieces in my heart. I love you Cali Irie! I love you more than words can say! I can’t wait to see all the things you’ll do with your life! And I can’t wait to cheer you on as you do them! Just always remember to Always be a kind! And to know Mama Loves you a more than life itself! I’ve got your back my sweet girl! I’ll love you forever!

Hi, I’m Tenly Loupe! I’m a 24 year old Mother Of Three Boys, Hunter (5 1/2), Tanner (4), and Jaxon (2), and I’m currently a little over Halfway Through My pregnancy with our Last Bundle Of Joy Cali Irie. I married the love of my life Ryan Loupe a couple of years back and we are coming up on Four Years together. I’m a certified doula, a midwife student, and I had the honor of carrying Twins as a surrogate in 2018-19.

I’m absolutely passionate about all things pregnancy and child birth! I was born to be a mother, I was also born to be a healer! I was adopted at a young age after severe Childhood abuse and trauma. I survived that upbringing and choose a path of loving and giving. This blog is here to share not only my struggles but my triumphs! I’m here to give YOU the tips you need to Thrive no matter what you are going through, or have gone through! I shouldn’t be alive today, and that’s my simple truth but I’m here fighting a life threatening disease called PPCM, stage two heart failure, and loving every minute I get to help someone else Love and live their best life!

Thank you for joining me on my journey! I’m soooo over the moon to have you here with me!

It’s A Girl!!!!!!!

The most unbelieveable words I heard was the genetic specialist at cousyl Say, “Are You Ready?... It’s A.... GIRL!” My hand covered my mouth, Tears welled up in my eyes, my thoat felt tight, my heart raced, and it was like she took the air right out of my Lungs. “Are You Okay?” I responded with, “it’s a girl??” Followed by laughter and Tears, I proceeded to tell her how I have three boys and I had done the sneak peek gender test which had said boy but my gut had told me I was carrying a little girl. This was the best news! But For those of you who don’t know me you won’t quite understand the emotion that came next, FEAR..............

By the hands of my own biological mother I suffered the worst case of physical, sexual, mental, and emotional abuse possible. Becoming a mother to my first born I realized that I could never and would never be my biological mother. That clearly she’s sick, and nothing I had done could ever create the path she chose to lead me down. BUT that fear came back as I realized I’m going to now have a daughter, a daughter like my biological had in me.... what if that evil comes out? What if I can not love her the way a mother should love her daughter? What if she hates me? And the list goes on. That little girl, whose mother didn’t want her came back, full force! I was wounded and scared. It was when I realized this, that a light bulb went off, I could never be that mother because I care too much, love too much, and have grown too much to ever be anything other than a loving, caring, gentle mother! To a boy or a girl! And in that moment I felt my whole world change again! It that moment I fell in love with a little girl named Cali Irie