envious

“temper tantrum,” he repeated her words, shaking his head as a scoff escaped past his lips ( despite them being only the truth, he was having a tantrum and for no reason ). he rolled his eyes. “jus’ sayin’. any normal person would’ve just stepped aside and avoided anything else, y’know? you didn’t have to speak up about shit,”

“So what, I’m expected to do what you want?” She scoffs as she rolls her eyes. “You know, if you wanted the easy way then maybe you should have simply used your words like a normal person.”  Besides, the easy way was never her thing. “Don’t put the blame on me for your piss poor attitude.”

‘ nah, i like to think i’m a sign from the universe you should NEVER go into medicine. think of all the carbon copies of ME you’d be dealing with. a girl as pretty as you shouldn’t have someone else’s blood on her hands. ’ the corner of his lips tugging upwards into the closest semblance of a smile he could manage, it disappeared with a sudden grimace at the sting of the alcohol. still, he barely flinched, jaw clenching taut as he slowly spoke again. ‘ i’m sorry. ’ for a moment, his words were genuine, eyes soft and sorrowful as he glanced at her. quickly, however, his tone changed, irises flashing with confidence. ‘ you should see the other guy. i look bad, but he looks unrecognisable. just like you would, if you tried to fight any of ‘em. even if i APPRECIATE the offer. ’

taking a seat on the corner of her bed, he was careful not to smear blood or grime on any of the impossibly neat surfaces. how she did it was a MYSTERY to him. gaze drifting over to kara as she entered, he cast her a grateful grin, red-raw fists digging into the bowl to press the cold cloth against his bruised jaw. ‘ mm-hmm, doctor. ’ despite everything, the teasing words slipped out anyway, the boy offering up only a doubtful shrug. ‘ hadn’t thought that far into my future, kar. an hour ago, i wasn’t even sure that guy was gonna let me live to see it. ’

xander breathed in heavily, only to let it out as a loud, obnoxious groan. he rolled his eyes once more, and dropped both hands down by his sides dramatically. maybe he was exaggerating. of course he was. and he hated himself for it but his mind was too slow to catch up with each word escaping past his lips. “what the fuck is your point? it wouldn’t be so hard to just- i don’t know, step aside? maybe then i wouldn’t be stuck here having this pathetic conversation,”

“You’re stuck here with this pathetic conversation because you decided to have a temper tantrum.” Her hands find themselves settling upon her hips. “I’m not going to simply step aside just because you’re glaring at me.” She huffs out. She didn’t exactly understand the concept of simply letting something go. “Let me guess, you thought intimidation was going to work in your favour?” 

if there were anything that would annoy him more in this very moment, it’d be being talked back to. he didn’t want to have to even form a sentence let alone a conversation. he didn’t want to turn this into anything more than it had to be. “gawking?” a small snort escaped past his lips. his head tilted to the side when he pulled the cigarette away and let the smoke he previously inhaled slip through his dry lips. “i’m sure it is. you know what else is highly aggravating? when someone’s in my fucking way and won’t fucking move. that’s highly aggravating,” his voice only grew more and more bitter the more he spoke. “do me a favor?” 

“Do you actually listen to yourself when you speak?” She responds in a snarky tone. “Or is your inferiority complex so drastic that you feel the need to lash out on random people for no good reason whatsoever?” She was simply making blanket statements, her own way of being purposefully irritating. “If you wanted me to move all you had to do was ask, or is that too much for you to comprehend?”

❛  then i guess that makes two of us.  ❜    truth is, he’s already far too intrigued to back away from it now. there has to be a reason she wants others to see her in a way she is not, he’s determined to figure it out. he couldn’t really fathom why anyone would want to be apart of the world he had grown up in. money was nice to have, it made life easier. but it was lonely. it was corrupt, filled with lies. as much as he enjoyed the luxury he was lucky enough to experience, if someone said he could trade it in for some inner peace, he would give it all up in a heartbeat.   ❛  doubtful, headlund. doubtful.  ❜   there’s a twinkle in his eye as he shakes his head and scrunches his nose. though perhaps she’ll prove him wrong on the nickname front. part of him is hoping that she will.   ❛  so, movies like psycho and the shining ??  see to me, they’re more thriller than horror. thriller i can do. thriller i enjoy.  ❜  thrillers, especially the type that required a lot of plot, were often the kind of movies he found himself gravitating towards. the sound of her chuckle causes him to laugh in turn, corners of eyes creasing. however, when she asks about him, he falls silent for several moments. he blows out a puff of air and reaches for the bottle, taking a long drink before he responds with another question of his own.   ❛  what do you want to know ??  ❜  

‘ — no one important. ‘s all good. ’ he shot her an ironic thumbs up, the effect ruined by bloodstained knuckles. jude can sense her gaze on him, and it’s almost enough to make him shift uncomfortably in place, one hand stretching awkwardly to rub the back of his neck. not many people care enough about him to look at him like that. ‘ oh, not really. it’s generally just a side effect of looking like someone tried to off me. ’ he crinkled her nose in her direction. ‘ gotcha. ’ following her orders, he slunk in the open door, traipsing up the stairs to the familiar room.

“For now, because going to a nudist beach is on my bucket list, and I’m taking too long to cross that off my list.”

“I’ve never met someone wanting to tick nudist beach off their bucket list. Though, I suppose I can see the appeal.”

some little part of him is almost expecting her not to show. after all, he probably does this too often; shows up, bloodied and bruised, expecting her to just take him in. not like he’d ever admit it, of course, but he’s thankful. ‘ kara. god, i could kiss you right now. ’ moving towards her, he points lazily at the bloody mess his lips have become. it’s got nothing on the purple ring forming around his eye, or the mangled flesh on his knuckles. ‘ but i’ll save it. you got any ice ? i tried that 24 hour k-mart, but the cashier threatened to call the cops on me. ’ despite everything, he cracks a joke. ‘ guess she didn’t appreciate me telling her to stick ‘em up. ’

❛ ‘s been a LONG and H A R D day.  ❜ they uttered with a wink, watching her with an INTRIGUED gaze.   ❛ we are practically the same, aside from me being taller, and more SEXY of course. ❜ while ludvig had somehow mastered faking their confidence, there was no doubt that the words sounded F A K E on their lips. ❛ ——– i seriously cannot believe you just said that.  ❜

❛ it is part of my CHARM, kar.  ❜ they simply shrugged, flinging a piece of the disgusting candy at her just because they could. ❛ i would. but there are R U L E S, like —- no grimacing, no spitting out, no swallowing it whole, you gotta chew it.  ❜ with that, they handed her the bag, offering her an annoyed look on their face. ❛ he is a BAG OF DICKS, runs in the family i suppose. ❜

❛ CAREFUL. that almost sounds like a challenge. ❜   there’s no doubt in his mind that with her, he’s only scratched the surface, that there’s far more he’s yet to figure out. perhaps that’s the reason he’s sitting here now, separate from the party and focused on their conversation. but he likes that he’s gotten further than most.    ❛ oh, good. can’t wait. ❜   sarcasm laces his tone, smile growing at the thought. he’s eager to see what she’ll come up with, but knows whatever it is, it’ll likely be something he dislikes. as she speaks, his eyes settle upon her, head nodding whilst information is being soaked up. some of it takes him by surprise, and it shows by the way he crinkles his nose. but it was nice. nice to see her be open, even if the information given was small.   ❛ that’s it  ??  movies, and reading. there’s no places you like to go  ?? ❜   fingers comb through sand absentmindedly, mind pondering what he’s been told.   ❛ i never really got the horror movie thing. most play into major stereotypes and are easily predictable. you’ll have to recommend me some that might change my mind. ❜   another nod is given, one that shows he agrees with her own observation of him.   ❛ you might be onto something there. i’ve been lucky enough to be surrounded by nice things, seems like it would be a waste not to appreciate them. ❜   though given how his life looked now, he would trade it all in for some sense of stability. for normalcy. someone to TRUST.