howl with me | dantei {ruina rex}
[At first, he’s surprised to hear it confirmed that Clove had been present, because so far, he’d only heard rumours, and he’d figured the rumours were fabricated. Mostly because they consisted of exaggerated ideas of Clove picking a fight with Kaiser, provoking him and threatening him until Kaiser collapsed. Which… really didn’t seem to track with Teilo’s impression of the NWRF Rep. With his impression of either of them, really. Even if tensions had risen, Clove wouldn’t have been interested in giving Kaiser that kind of time and energy. He’s not one to engage in that way. Much quicker to close himself off, to turn away when he doesn’t want to deal with the conflict. Acting above it, whether he believes it or not.
He’s also surprised he’d not heard the bit about the chair being thrown. If he had, he’d have been inclined to believe that was exaggerated rumour as well.
Dante focused on the medical side of things. His prognosis based on the details he has access to, educated guesses and inference. And by the case he makes, it does make sense. It makes too much sense for Teilo to really be suspect of the NWRF’s involvement.]
[He nods, pensive.] Mm. Yeah I was skeptical about the theories involving the NWRF as well. [Not because he’d put it past a corrupt government to orchestrate an execution of convenience, but because it just didn’t seem to add up, here.] But… if it really was caused by the use of his infection… that’s a scary thought, isn’t it? [All he can think of is Sid. If this is true, does Sid know? How does he feel about it? How would Teilo, were he in his shoes?] Because aneurysm or not… do you think it’s possible it could have gone unruptured, had it not been for the use of Kaiser’s telekinesis? Or even, do you think there’s a chance it was caused by the telekinesis? Do we know for sure that it wasn’t?
[Dante has little to do with the Infection testing. It’s not his area of expertise, he’s no geneticist. But he wishes now that he had some degree of involvement more than he does, because he honestly feels as much at a loss as anyone else.
It’s incredibly frustrating that six years on they still have such a sparse understanding of the Infections. Resources are limited and so many thousands of excellent minds have been lost, so of course there’s only so much they can do, but still. It isn’t in Dante’s nature to accept mediocrity.
It isn’t usually in his nature to tiptoe on thin ice, either. The tension is heavy in the air. Kaiser’s passing is bigger than his relationship with Teilo; he knows this in his head. The whole Colony is in chaos. So why doesn’t it feel as big? It feels incomparably small, a little hum of background noise to the clamour in his head. He wants to confess everything, and he wants to shut his mouth and not say another word. He wants to make Teilo happy, but he can’t imagine how that would be possible any more.
This conversation about Infections isn’t a conversation he wants to have, but it’s better than the one they will have to have in time. At least Dante knows the words to say, though they do sound hollow, as if recited by rote.]
No, and with how poorly understood the Infections are, I doubt the autopsy will provide much clarity. But even if the rupture was directly related to his telekinesis, that shouldn’t worry the general population. Brain aneurysms don’t really have an identifiable cause; sometimes they just happen. And when they rupture, it is often just a matter of timing. Only something like one or two per cent of the population have a brain aneurysm, and of that small percentage only a small fraction will have the aneurysm rupture.
That’s not a reason for people to change the way they live. If Infections were a huge risk to people’s health, we’d have seen a lot more of this by now. Kaiser’s death was extremely unfortunate, but even if it was directly caused by his telekinesis, I think you’d be hard put to argue that it’s a life altering revelation. There will always be statistical outliers and if you live your life according to the worst possible scenario then you live a limited life indeed.
[He’s not sure how comforting the argument is about the one or two percent—because what if that’s a changing statistic? It could be, couldn’t it? What’s to say that aneurysms won’t become more common, since the development of the Infections? After all, it’s only been five or six years, which is nothing in the field of medical research, really, and even less in the field of statistics.
He does have to concede that Dante makes a good point when it comes to the general risk of the Infections; there’s still so much they don’t know—at least, there’s still so much the public doesn’t know—but surely if the Infections posed a threat to physical health, they’d have seen more of those patterns by now. And if they had, he’s also sure that the NWRF would have pounced at the opportunity to use that kind of information against the public as a scare tactic—frighten people into siding with the Reformists, into believing in the importance and necessity of the New Wave.
But then again... one could still argue that this is only the beginning. Could it be that there are long term effects of the Infections, that they simply haven’t seen until now because they haven’t had the data? Because everything has been so wholly new and uncharted? Could this be the unfortunate inception of something even more unfortunate?
Nonetheless, he nods. Slowly, quietly. Everything Dante says is true in its own right, anyway, even if there is room still for doubt. It’s valid—it just may not be enough.
Teilo falls quiet after that. He finds he doesn’t know what to say because Dante’s answers are sensible, and whether he’s right or not, there’s no value in arguing with someone who doesn’t have any more answers than he’s already provided. And if Teilo were simply a citizen looking for information, now might be when he’d thank the doctor for his time and politely excuse himself.
But there is a much larger elephant in the room and Teilo is torn between addressing it, and avoiding it entirely, because he doesn’t want to push or corner Dante. He’s maintained through this that he wants to respect Dante’s privacy, and his need for time, to process whatever it is he’s trying to come to terms with. He also doesn’t want to pressure a man who’s already apparently primed for a misfire.
But it’s painful, not being with him, not touching him, or being touched by him, and it leaves a hollow feeling in Teilo’s chest. He keeps reliving Dante pulling away from his embrace, telling him ‘don’t’. It’s less than pleasant, to put it gently, and it’s responsible for this uneasy nausea and disorientation. ]
[ Finally, after a long moment of searching the Elite’s face, he speaks again.] Are you busy tonight? [He almost adds a ‘Doctor Carrington’, because they’re in the man’s office, and because Teilo is doing what he can to fault on the side of professional, formal even. But he resists, because he’s worried it would send the wrong message, or come off passive aggressive. Besides, neither of them should be pretending what’s between them is purely formal or professional, least of all, Dante.]