When I was 21 and a baby butch, I looked borderline intimating. I had tattoos, piercings, a shaved head, and was pretty damn buff. (Still am, except with more tattoos.) Though I had (and still have) a no bullshit, gruff, and in charge attitude towards men, when it came to girls, I was like an overexcited puppy. It was easy for pretty ladies to take advantage of me because if a cutie needed some kinda favor, my brain would be like “!!!” and I’d lose all sense of logic, jumping headfirst into whatever she needed of me.
That’s why, when a particularly stunning girl who I had a few classes with noticed me in a bar and asked me to be her girlfriend to ward off the guys hitting on her, I did it. (I’m pretty blatantly lesbian, not just because of my butchness but if anyone doubted it, I literally have a double Venus tattoo on my arm.) These days, I’m a couple years older (23) and I know the whole “pretend girlfriend” shtick would only attract more negative attention than it’s worth, but I didn’t think about it. I just wanted to make sure she’d be all right and get the guys off her asses.
She subtly nodded towards the guys who were harassing her, but beyond some gawking they didn’t come over again. She breathed a sigh of relief and thanked me.
“Guess you didn’t need to pretend to be my girlfriend,” she said, laughing. “But if you want, maybe we could get to know each other better, and maybe someday we wouldn’t have to pretend?”
Being a clueless dumbass, I responded, “Huh?” Oh god, I could slap myself for being so unaware.
“I’m hitting on you,” she said with a smile. Was this whole thing a setup? My brain couldn’t handle it. When I blinked, unable to process the situation (I didn’t have much romantic experience), she looked nervous, and added, “That’s okay, right?” Looking back, I’m impressed with how direct she was. It blew away the usual “Wait, is this a date?” type experiences I had before.
“Y-yeah,” is all I could manage.
Me and my femme have been not-pretend girlfriends for almost 2 years now. :) <3
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