I wonât stop reblogging this until I have them!
trying on a metaphor

Kiana Khansmith

çĽćĽ / Permanent Vacation

#extradirty
Jules of Nature

â
I'd rather be in outer space đ¸

ellievsbear
almost home
dirt enthusiast
$LAYYYTER
Three Goblin Art
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"

Discoholic đŞŠ
Misplaced Lens Cap
Mike Driver
ojovivo
KIROKAZE
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@tdragon02
I wonât stop reblogging this until I have them!

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Gone were the girlboss memes and investment tips for young professionals. Almost overnight, Tay's instagram feed transformed from total yuppie to aspiring milf. It all started when she decided, after a few too many drinks, to have a one-night-stand with her coworker. Turns out he planted more than a bun in her oven -- thanks to an experimental serum that had his semen rewriting her DNA from the inside out.
Her straight black hair turned curly blonde.
Her steely stare turned doe-eyed.
Her commanding tone turned pouty lipped.
Oh, and her tits practically tripled in size.
Her coworkers dismissed it all as a quarter-life crisis and impulse makeover, but the missed deadlines at work were harder to excuse. Her supervisor asked her to take a mental health break. Tay blamed it all on pregnancy brain -- though she had to confess she'd spent far too many days in the office shopping online for cute outfits and staring longingly at the secretaries who got to spend all day bringing coffee to the men.
But time away from the office only made things worse. She bought a stroller -- just for practice, she told herself -- and started pushing it everywhere. And started wearing nothing but hues of baby blue once she doctor confirmed she'd be having boys -- twins in fact.
Oh, and she decided to break the lease on her apartment once she realized she had spent every night at her coworkers place to cook him dinner and suck his dick and beg for him to pound her pussy while calling her a dumb little milf.
The Tay who posted girlboss memes and investment tips would have been repulsed. But the Tay who posted Boy Mom content. Well... it was exactly what she wanted.
So one morning I woke up to find my roommate Sarah standing over me with a weird grin across her face.
âHey Dan,â she said. âYou ever hear of universal remotes?â
I rubbed my eyes as I joined the world of the waking. âIsnât that the thing that guys use to turn their girlfriends into bimbos or whatever?â I said with a yawn.
âYeah, but I was planning on using mine to turn my roommate into my younger sister.â
I thought I had misheard her given how groggy I was, but with a click she proved me wrong. Instantly my body started to shrink, my hair grew, my chest swelled. I reached down and breathed a sigh of relief as I wrapped my hands around my still-existent dick, only to realize that I pulled out a dildo from under my now-pink bedsheets.
âWow, Danielle. You are quite the little pervette. We really need to get you a boyfriend. But first, letâs go shopping!â
I wanted to yell at Sarah. Scream obscenities at her. Demand that she turn me back. But all that I could muster was âOMG sis shut up!â
I was able to muster some kind of resistance, but admittedly it just reenforced the whole âbratâ look. I dragged my feet as I got ready. Rolled my eyes as we got in her car. Ignored conversation.
But the whole little sister thing really took off once we got to the mall. Whenever Sarah picked out a short skirt, I went for the shorter one. When she tried on makeup, I put on more. And when she flirted with boys, ugh, I donât even want to think about it.
And to make matters worse, she kept clicking away at the remote to give me a thicker ass, bigger tits, fuller lips, or whatever other change seemed to make her laugh in the moment. I actually had to go back to get a bigger size bra three different times when we were at Victoriaâs Secret.
Plus, you know, I had to find one that looked cute at least.
But despite a few risky moments, I was able to leave the mall with most of my dignity intact, and a few fun outfits too.
Like, what do you think? Gawd, my ass looks so hot in this. I swear, is it bad that Iâm turning myself on? Unf.
Wait, what was I saying?
Oh yeah. So we got back to our apartment and I was pretty sure that Sarah was going to give me some self control back because I felt my head start to tingle. But just as I was about to test it out, Sarah looked at me dead in the eye.
âNow Dan,â she said, using my guy name for the first time in hours. âI could turn you back. Or I could let you have some fun back in your room as Danielle.â
I knew exactly what I wanted. After all, how often do I get a chance to explore a hot redhead first hand like this. Unf, I had a whole thing planned out about dirty talking to myself in the mirror andâŚ
âBut if you want to have fun in your room, Danielle,â Sarah said, interrupting my train of thought. âThen you have to come with me to a schoolgirl party tonight and I donât turn you back until tomorrow morning.â
So what do you guys think? Did I make the right call?
Yeah, hi, is this Pink Pill customer service?
Oh whew, glad to finally talk to a real person instead of a computer. Ahem, yes, I had ordered Executives Pink Pills? You know, the ones with subtle body alteration, erotic maximization, and no impact on intelligence? Yes, well I took them and, um, well, I can't seem to be able to put on clothes. Is... is this a normal side effect?
Um, two I think. With some red wine. This was last night before my husband and I... heh... well, never mind.
Well, that's a bit what I'm implying, yes we had intercourse shortly afterwards.
Waiting period? I don't remember anything about a waiting period.
I mean... no, I didn't read all of the instructions. We were kind of in the moment, you know.
Forty-eight hours?! Well is there anything I can do?
No, I haven't tried lingerie yet. Hm, ok. And you just scale up from there?
Alright, well I guess I'll send my husband on a quick shopping trip for me. And maybe I can have some fun rewarding him afterwards. Unf... oh, sorry about that, the pill you know.
Thank you.
Jane had always been pretty active on social media -- she saw it as a way to build her professional brand. Lots of posting about productivity, or her presentation at the latest corporate convention, or her training for the latest charity 5k (where the firm was a sponsor, of course).
So it was only natural when the company would bring on board a PR consultant to help her build her brand even further.
But the training wasn't what Jane had expected. She couldn't remember the process, exactly, but the consultant was so nice. And handsome. And charming. She was more than willing to push for him to be put on permanent payroll.
Meanwhile, Jane's social media footprint started to change. Fewer posts about work, more about her favorite juice bar. Or perfecting her hot yoga positions. Or showing off her new engagement ring.
Turned out that Mr. Consultant made for quite the Mr. FiancĂŠ.
And soon enough, quite the Mr. Daddy.

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Kelly leaned forward in the study room chair, skeptical of her study buddy's story.
"So you're telling me you had this remote that could manipulate reality?"
He nodded, his eyes darting back and forth between Kelly's face and her tits.
She noticed, and arched her back a bit more.
"And you messed around with it but now can't turn anything back to normal?"
He nodded, squirming awkwardly in his chair as Kelly leaned in closer.
"So what did you change?"
He bit his lip, clearly uncomfortable with the question.
"Like, did you change anything about yourself?"
Kelly only half listened as he started to answer, distracted by his thick biceps, washboard abs, and impressive bulge in his sweatpants.
She nodded and giggled as he finished explaining.
"So, like, then what did you change about me?"
He started to answer, but Kelly swiftly put a finger to his lips.
"Actually," she said as she slipped down to her knees. "Let me guess..."
Sarah loved her lace gown. Sure it was expensive, but it was totally worth it. Whenever she draped the gossamer silk over her lithe form, she always felt so sexy -- like some erotic seductress or femme fatale. At least that's how she felt in it before she popped the pink pill on her getaway vacation with her boyfriend and sprouted tits the size of melons. Suddenly the luxurious lingerie seemed out of place as she struggled to pull it over her temporarily engorged curves. Sarah found herself yearning for something more appropriate to her new look -- something in hot pink. Luckily for her there was a mall not too far from the hotel, and pink-pill improved lips were the perfect away to convince her boyfriend to take her shopping.
âNow just because my assistant knocked me up is no reason to miss out on the companyâs annual team meeting. After all, directors from all eight offices will be there and Iâm supposed to give the keynote address â no way Iâm skipping that.
Well, true that my assistant is stepping in for that because my preggo brain has made it, like, nearly impossible to string a sentence together. But Iâm giving his intro.
And, yeah, my intro just announces that Iâm taking a year long maternity leave and heâll be filling in for me as regional director. But that just shows what a great mentor Iâve been for him.
And sure, Iâll be moving in with him and cooking and cleaning and playing good little wifey in the meantime. But thatâs just to save money and make sure our baby has a good relationship with his daddy.
Anyways, Iâve gotta go. Iâve got a mommy massage at the conference hotel spa. And once thatâs done, Iâm giving my hubby, erm, assistant, a special massage back in our room.
Giggles!â
Josie had just landed at the resort that morning but she already had a deep tan thanks to her husbandâs remote.
That was also why her tits grew three cup sizes and her swimsuits reshaped into revealing bikinis.
She admittedly couldnât help but feel a bit ridiculous and was starting to wonder whether her âNo Mental Changesâ rule was a good idea.
But soon sheâd feel her husbandâs gaze across the body and start to squirm. After all, an increased libido was a physical change. Not a mental one. Right?
Mean Girls Blog!
A universal remote? Donât be silly. Thatâs only pretend. Thereâs no way that, like, your ex boyfriend can control the universe or whatever. Even if he is the hottest guy on campus.
And speaking of your ex, apparently heâs administering our tag-team blowjob exam tomorrow. So break out your practice dildo and letâs get started. I swear, Iâve heard heâs like the toughest grader and my parents said theyâll buy me implants if I get a 4.0 this semester so I really need to make sure Iâve totally destroyed my gag reflex. Kâ study buddy?

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by Mikhail Kabochkin
Nikki sprawled across the soft, white sheets of the California King bed, the scent of the previous nightsâ (and that morningâs) lovemaking still fresh in the air. She couldnât help but smirk at the thought that, only a week ago, sheâd be stuck in traffic during her hellish commute to work. That was before her coworker made her realize that she didnât really want to be an ambitious businesswoman anymore. She just wanted to be a kept stay-at-home wifey. Of course, that didnât mean she didnât have a busy day ahead of her â yoga class to tighten her bod, a salon appointment for a proper blonde dye-job, a check-in with a plastic surgeon for some Double-Ds, and then the fertility specialist to top it all off. After all, she was nearing 40 and babies didnât come as easily as they used to. But this way, thanks to hubbyâs credit card, she could start popping them out as quickly as possible.
Sarah tried to slip on her usual comfy sneakers, but stumbled to the floor and landed right on her newly engorged rear end. Apparently whatever had granted her newfound curves and changed her hair from brunette to blonde also made it impossible to walk around in anything but high heels.
Alison Brie
Sigh, it's so funny that my roommate thinks he can use this book of magic spells to change me. And besides, why would he even want to? I'm already basically his perfect woman -- not to mention my love of giving blowjobs. Anyway, where was I. Ah yes, finding a spell to turn my bestie into my lesbian lover. Hmm... and maybe I should make her obsessed with BJs too. Giggle!
The plan was admittedly a bit convoluted: Kevin would get a supply of Pink pills, use them to infiltrate the sorority, steal their crest, and bring it back to the frat house. The guys would be so psyched that they'd have to let him join and then he'd get all the babes he could want.
It only took a few days before Kevin realized he could just cut out the middleman and stay in the sorority -- and have more than enough fun watching the babe in the mirror do exactly what he wanted.
Alexa Stel
Alex wasnât sure what was worse: The fact that his ex-girlfriend had transformed him into his own personal fantasy girl â complete with an insatiable oral fixation. Or the fact that his former dick was now hanging between her legs, practically begging to be sucked.

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Emma Watson
Kevin couldnât believe it! His girlfriend got her hands on a universal remote but wouldnât tell him what she had changed. Ugh! That was just like her â an overly confident jerk.
It was funny, because Kevin distinctly remember her complaining just the day before that Kevin had taken way too much control of their relationship.
But that couldnât be right.
After all, he was just a cute boy who pouted when he didnât get his way and his girlfriend was so tall and muscular and⌠unf, Kevin had to retuck his dick just thinking about it. After all, jerk or no jerk, he did want to look cute for her â but not like some total slut who showed off his bulge all the time.
Katherine was not looking forward to joining her husband at his 10 year college homecoming. Sure, he was Mr. Professional now (and she was Mrs. Professional) but she hated how he went through a sort of revertigo when he got around his undergrad buddies. His brilliant mind became obsessed with nothing but beer, babes and bros. Luckily, he said he had an idea for making things fun for her, too.
*click*
Kate couldnât wait to tag along with her husband at his 10 year college homecoming. A weekend of partying with his old state school buddies was definitely a nice break from their professional routine. Plus, she always loved any excuse to dress up like some immature coed and show off a bit â a fun little game Kate never got to play during her own elite liberal arts undergrad experience. It was a game she knew her husband particularly enjoyed.
*click*
Kiki couldnât wait for her boyfriend to come visit! He was so smart and handsome and charming and sexy and⌠and⌠and she struggled to keep her cool â mostly by relentlessly touching herself.
She had been hitting the gym like a madwoman to earn a body to die for â a few lazy handjobs to her TAs meant she could skip class without worrying about grades â and now she was ready to show it all off. Tits and ass and all.
Kiki was going to give her boyfriend a weekend heâd never forget.