Life Interrupted TBI

 There are going to be a lot of new people entering your life. Sanity tip.. Create a new email account for all the information these new people are going to want to send you. Keep a steno pad with you. Take notes and names of everyone.

Your nurses. In the ICU a nurse is assigned usually one or two patients. They work twelve hour shifts and rotate patients assigned to them. Each Nurse will have with him/her a tech. The nurse is the only one who will be able to administer medications, while the tech helps with care, bathing, changing sheets and assisting the nurse. Your nurse is your best friend. She will be the one to answer the phone and give you updates on the status of your loved one. Keep your nurses happy. Bring deserts.  Ask questions as to what medications your loved one is taking and how often, learn from her. Don’t get offended if you get a nurse once in a while that seems strict or stern. I have found those women and men take their job seriously and are more attentive to the patient.

Docs and more docs. On every shift an overseeing doctor is assigned to care for all patients on that unit. Basically just there to assign any needed medication changes and the goto person if something major goes wrong.  These doctors can change all the time. Most likely your loved one was placed in a medical group with an overseeing staff who will decide how to proceed with medical care. Ask questions, find out.

You will also be introduced to a social worker. This cheerful person will act as your support person and new bestie. BEWARE. This is your new frenemy. They work for the hospital and utilization group. Their job is to find a way to get your loved one out of the hospital ASAP. They are all about minimizing cost.

Utilization group. You are not going to see these people, might not even be allowed to know their names, but they are going to be responsible for the care your loved one gets. Their job is to soak the insurance for as much as they can get, and when done, kick you out the door. I am going to save them for a special post.

Palliative care is something you might not need if your loved one is still in a coma. Their job is to make sure the patient has a good quality of care and not in any pain. When your loved one begins to wake up from this nightmare, they should be some of the first people you call in.

TBI Week One. The first week is the worst. The sudden shock of having a loved one suffer an illness that lands them in the ICU , most likely on life support. There is a lot going on, you are glued to the phone and body is on overdrive.

There is going to be lots to do. But not the first week. You need to calm yourself as your body harshly accepts this shock to your system. Its ok to cry, yell scream, vent. All of it is going to be normal for your body right now. Just don’t give into fears, you have to prepare for a fight. You have a long fight ahead of your right now as much as does the loved one laying in that hospital bed.

For your first save your sanity tip, DELEGATE COMMUNICATION. Everyone is going to be calling you for updates about your loved one, You need to keep the line open for when you get calls from the hospital and you don’t want to keep telling the same story over and over to every aunt , brother, uncle etc that calls. What I did that I found very helpful, was create a facebook group and invited all his friends and family to join. That way I could just update the page each day and not have to keep repeating myself on the phone all day. I also assigned his sister to call all family members with updates that did not use facebook, another friend of my husband was assigned to update his friends and co workers who, again, did not use facebook.

I begin this blog a year into my journey in hope to help others deal with the stress and downfalls of having a spouse suffer a coma and brain injury. I hope to offer guidance as you feel the world is crashing down around. You are not alone. In writing this to, I hope to get out all the stress and emotions that I too have had to deal with in the past year.

TBI or traumatic brain injury will be addressed, although my husband suffered an anoxic brain injury after a severe asthma attack sent him into cardiac arrest last February. He was in a coma several months. Now alert, severe cognitive problems and now home where I provide 24/7 care.