so i could hide

Birthday: February 14th 1997, 8:13am (Seoul, SK) 

Chart:

Descriptions of major natal chart placements and Houses: 

With Sun in Aquarius, Jaehyun is someone who is very independent, original and open minded. Aquarius sun people are known for breaking the rules and ‘freeing themselves’ from personal and social conditions- Hating being generalized or put into a box because they value their individuality and their uniqueness. This also makes him a very open minded person, who appreciates people from all walks of life. He often tries to make others see the bigger picture of things and be true to themselves. 

Sun in the 12th house: With the Sun in the 12th house, Jaehyun is someone who’s quiet, the 12th house is a house that swallows up the energy of whatever planet it is in. In a lot of social situations, he comes across as uncomfortable, reserved and very shy. In privet and around people he knows he has a bunch of energy, is talkative and engaging. [ With this placement he tends to absorb the identity others project onto him and has a hard time figuring out who he is ]

With his moon in Taurus, he likes familiarity and tends to rely on the safety and comfort material things gives him. People with Taurus moon aren’t very adaptable, accepting changes – especially changes that happen too quick. Unpredictability makes him uncomfortable and feel unsafe, which is why he tends to go out of his way to avoid unpredictable situations and instead focus on creating a reliable and secure life around himself. He is also someone who likes the simple things in life and is very simple to please as well. [ This placement makes him quite a romantic guy, and someone with strong and deep affection]  

Moon in the 2nd house: With the moon in the 2nd house, he is very creative when it comes to earning money because money and possessions have s an emotional impact and dictate his feelings of security.He is very generous with what he has, but fears being in debt or not paying bills in time– Again the need to feeling safe and secure. He is not the type to express his feelings when he feels them and tends to go over them before showering them/expressing himself. [ With this placement pride can be an issue because he often looks of admiration and often depends on people for positive feedback]

With mercury in Aquarius, he has a different perspective than most, with a very innovative and original mind. He is someone with a quirky sense of humor and a subtle way of stirring others up. He is often quick to contradict others and offers different perspectives on the topics. He is very open-minded and forward thinking making him an idealistic thinker. When conversing he tends to talk up a storm, without being loud or obnoxious. It is almost impossible for him to stick to one subject because his mind is all over the place.[ People with Aquarius Mercury often play the devil’s advocate ] 

Mercury in the 12th house: With Mercury in the 12th house, he tends to have a lot of friend (often younger than him) He likes people who have been through a lot, people who are thinkers and cultivated. He tends to keep his opinion to himself despite his rebellious mercury sign. In this house, he doesn’t like to share his ideas and it is mostly all up in his own mind or shared amongst peoples he is close to. He likes learning on his own especially through experience. [ Often needs time alone ]

With Venus in Aquarius, he is someone who tries to impress the person he likes with his intelligent and open-minded spirit. He wants others to see him as unique and acknowledge/appreciate that they don’t follow the line everybody else is on. Aquarius Venus people tend to feel threatened by any types of restrictions. He wants others to love him for his intelligence and his visions and is most likely to fall in love with a good/close friend. [Aquarius Venuspeople try to avoid emotional display like their life depended on it ] 

Venus in the 12th house: With Venus in the 12th house he dislikes public display of affection and prefers to keep his business behind closed doors. He tries to keep his identity separated from his partner [Fear of not being his own unique person – being a ‘We’ instead of an ‘I’] People with this placement are usually attracted to a large group of people, as long as that person is the Aquarius Venus’ soul mate. He tends to give too much in love/relationships because he lets people he loves take advantage of him as long as he believes that they love him. [ He has a hard time opening up about love ]  

With Mars in Libra, he is someone who looks at things carefully before acting. He tends to procrastinate and has a need to weigh all of his options and the alternatives before taking action. People with this placement tend to get caught up in defending themselves and others while having the overall goal to live peacefully, he tends to stir others up with his desire to balance everything. Another thing people with this placement often have a talent for is predicting when problems will occur. Jaehyun is really good at compromising and deflating ugly situations very peacefully. He is someone who is quite passive aggressive, because of how he never wants to appear mean or unfair, his passive aggressiveness tends to get the best of him and ends up in sneaky behavior. [ Starting things without it ever being lead to him directly ]  

Mars in the 7th house: With Mars in the 7th house, he is someone who needs a dynamic partner – Not overly sensitive or unable to handle confrontations/arguments. He likes having conflicts in his relationships, because he finds it more fun and exiting. He tends to dominate in his love life, and can easily end up in a stormy relationship. He can commit to one person for a long time, but if there isn’t any newness or excitement, he usually ends it. [ Is the type to make you break up with him to avoid doing it himself ]  

Ascendant: Pisces - People with Pisces rising are often flexible and unpredictable. They go with the flow and are often seen as people who don’t pay much attention, but this is because they are always in their heads questioning things most people don’t think about at all. They can have various moods and ‘personalities’ depending on who they are with. They are very soft hearted and tend to instantly take others problems onto themselves. They dislike confrontation especially if it isn’t in privet. They try to avoid harsh truths because they don’t like facing reality. They like reliable people but can sometimes disappear themselves, but try their best to be there for loved once. 

Dominant modality - Fixed: With fix signs steadiness is key, and people with this modality tend to be very determined and confident. They hate wasting time and are always working towards what they consider is best. They do not rush things but instead moves steadily towards their goals. While prone to stubbornness, they may have a tendency to get stuck in their ways and believe that they are always right.

Major Aspects: Sun Square Moon:He has an internal struggle between his moon and sun [his needs and his wants] While he wants freedom and goes against rules, he also wants familiarity and fears change. This aspect makes him lack focus and is indecisive. Mercury Conjunction Venus: He is very positive and tends to look at the bright side of things. He is very charming and poetic in his self-expression. He appreciates the beauty in things and aims to balance and bring harmony to his world. He often sees everybody’s point of view which makes him very indecisive and someone tends to stay in the middle then picking a side [From his strong sense of fairness] He tends to intellectualize his own feelings and often loses touch with how he truly feels.  Mercury Trine Mars: He is quick, practical and brave. He has a very restless mind. He says what he means and means what he says, and is very secure and firm in his decision without being aggressive.  -       Mercury Conjunction Jupiter: He is very detailed in what he does, with a lot of love for learning and teaching others. Has a strong sense of justice and always tries to see the bigger picture.  Venus Trine Mars: He easily attracts positive attention and radiates charm, enthusiasm, and liveliness. He presents himself in a very straight forward manner and doesn’t try to hide his flaws. His creativity comes naturally to him, so when others recognize it as talented it I surprising to him. [ Possesses great athletic abilities]

Venus Conjunction Jupiter: When comfortable he is very easygoing. He has a warm and approachable sense of humor, which often can turn into a more flirtatious sense of humor. He is a very helpful person but tends to be hesitant when he needs help himself.

Johnny and Jaehyun were still holding hands when they got on the elevator back at the dorms

They’d held hands and giggled all the way home

But when the elevator door closed and Johnny finally let go of Jaehyun’s hand, Jaehyun felt…

Disappointed, maybe?

He wasn’t sure

He just tried to hide it as best he could

“Kings of fanservice!” Johnny crowed excitedly, pumping one fist in the air and grinning

Jaehyun made himself grin and laugh back

“Yeah. Kings of fanservice.”

They fell silent after that

The elevator ride took longer than usual

People getting off and on and a lady accidentally pressed the wrong button and carried them back down a few floors

But finally they were alone again

Jaehyun could feel Johnny watching him

They knew each other well enough by now that hiding feelings wasn’t an option

Except?

Jaehyun had been hiding some feelings in particular for a long time

Like, years

“Hey, Jae?” Johnny started to ask, but then Jaehyun couldn’t stop himself

He muttered right over Johnny’s words, so that his own were all but drowned out

Johnny didn’t let it go

Of course he didn’t

“Sorry, bro. What did you say?”

Jaehyun winced at their normal, casual name for each other

At first, he wasn’t going to repeat himself

He would just think of something stupid and say that instead

If he could think of anything stupider than the truth.

(He couldn’t)

(He said it anyway)

“I said, what if it wasn’t.”

Jaehyun was whispering

The elevator dinged again

They were finally at their floor, and Jaehyun was more than ready to bolt out and go back to his room and avoid all of this

Except…

Johnny jammed his finger on the button to close the door again, sending it back down to the very bottom floor

Jaehyun stared at his feet

“What if what wasn’t?” Johnny pressed

Jaehyun let out a little sigh, giving up

“What if it wasn’t fanservice.”

He had no intention of elaborating. He’d already said too much

The silence hung between them for a moment, and Jaehyun was about to try again, to try to deflect

But suddenly Johnny was crowding his side of the elevator and pulling Jaehyun close and tilting his face up and then

They were kissing.

Johnny’s kisses weren’t timid, like Jaehyun’s would have been if he’d done this

His lips were hot on Jaehyun’s, full of desperation and bravery and Jaehyun was almost ashamed of the way he moaned into Johnny’s mouth

Almost

Except he wasn’t, because Johnny moaned back and pushed him against the elevator wall harder and

Neither of them noticed when the ride stopped again, back at the top floor

They didn’t notice when the door slid open

But they sure as hell paid attention to the dolphin shriek that came out of one of their youngest members who just happened to be waiting in the hallway

Johnny and Jaehyun went skidding apart from each other immediately, both of them turning to stare at Chenle with wide eyes

“HOLY SHIT,” the youngest of them cackled. “Holy shit. I gotta. I gotta tell Mark. I gotta tell everyone. We’ve been waiting for this forever!”

With that, Chenle went screeching down the hallway

Neither Johnny nor Jaehyun had recovered enough to say anything yet

But after a moment, Johnny slipped his hand back into Jaehyun’s and led him off the elevator, squeezing it as they walked down the hall slowly

They could hear screams of glee behind the door, and both of them knew what they were in for the minute they walked in

Jaehyun kind of just wanted to stay out here forever, just he and Johnny

He glanced up, and he was about to tell Johnny so, but the older smiled down at him, his eyes crinkling at the edges

“I think we’ve done enough avoiding for the time being, don’t you?”

Jaehyun blushed.

You’re the one that I desire