Talons & Tea Leaves

lestat de lioncourt is too silly he really said "after it took me over a century to get over my dead boyfriend, the most depressed man in all of france, i am ready to try again with my new boyfriend: the most depressed man in all of america"

Last week I joked that my very cerebral, retired-police-chief-grandpa is basically Holt from Brooklyn 99 and then today someone said, “damn, we’re out of decaf” and he just deadpans “well there’s no need to get hysterical.”

Yesterday he said “if you need to insult the same person twice you’ve already failed in your goal to devastate them”

My Yaya was trying to remember the name of a guy who stole money from her in high school today and my grandpa instantly pipes up “his name was Bernie Ryan and he was a scoundrel”

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

How we greet friends now

oh to live in the treasure planet universe

oh to have a huge petticoat and a lazer gun and travel from planet to planet in a large 18th century style spaceship