#zecron

"We don’t talk anymore-” but somehow, he doesn't regret it, not really. Emmanuel knows that there's a reason why they don't; but there are days where that knowledge doesn't make it hurt less.

“I still think about what I’d say if we did. There is so much that has happened-”

He exhales, closing his eyes. He can see Volodymyr now, his smile quiet, fond; his brown eyes sparkling with affection, a hand reaching to gently squeeze his shoulder in silent encouragement.

Go on. 

“But I wouldn't talk about any of that because I know you've probably seen it all anyway, on the news because I know you'd never be able to let go entirely but instead of all that, I'd tell you how– how proud I am of you, of everything you achieved - the whole world was changed because of you- of what you, what Ukraine did. And, well, I'd tell you how much I miss you. Things happen and my instinct-” there is a lump in his throat. “I want to tell you about them because I know you'd want to hear and you'd laugh with me about some of it and be angry about the rest probably. You'd want to be back in the thick of it, I suppose-”

Words fail him for a moment. He pinches at the bridge of his nose. 

“I wouldn't talk about that. I'd talk about how much- when you went away- when you- said that you weren’t going to run for office again.. I remember Olena’s face in the papers and on the news I thought she'd burst with joy because she was getting you back.”

He laughs softly at the memory; he’d never seen Olena quite so happy, not even on Victory Day somehow, because even on that day, she didn’t have her husband back, not yet.

“How could I begrudge that? Then you told me that you were going away and you never said where and I never asked; just- that it would be somewhere you could recuperate, that you could rest. I don't know if you're in Ukraine still or- or maybe you’re someplace else. But- I still remember your face and I'd tell you- how glad it made me because you were so happy. That it was.. That it is over and you can find peace again, whatever that looks like. For you, for Olena and the children and- and Maks too. All of you. You deserve it more than anyone I’ve ever known.”

“I love you more than anyone I've ever known. And, God, I hope you're still happy, Vova. Wherever you are.”

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