#yeah. yeah!!

starting 2 get a little bit of hair on my stomach 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

there is a Jiang Wanyin Fan Club based in yunmeng with new members joining everyday. trust me I was there

truthfully. i hate her. i just hate her so much. after my failed catholic upbringing and religious trauma, my own personal cultivation of spirituality had become a deeply personal thing for me. an important part of my being. i see how my optimism was exploited for an attempt at personal gain, how i was discarded once she realized there was nothing left she could gain. she used me and used me, wrung me out until there was nothing else she could get. and now i cannot look at the same things that once brought me so much comfort the same way anymore. i know i need to tap back into spirituality on my own and regain my sense of comfort with it. i've had so many other people spiritually advise me without taking advantage of the intricacies of my mental state. and i, myself, can take care of myself and continue my pursuits independently. it's just... a lot to reckon with. i wish there was a button i could press that would make me entirely forget her entire existence and everything that she ever told me.

"always startled to find I survived."