#yeah angst

also this spray paint drawing was kinda rushed so. SHUSH.

2024

For some reason when I first got into the Spy vs. Spy fandom I kept drawing the spies with these hair tufts because I thought they looked bald but I don’t do that anymore ❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

To be completely honest, I'm not sure what to title this. I heard a slightly depressing tiktok audio and this is what came into fruition from it. Enjoy. Oh and also. I know this is tagged angst but it really isn't heart wrenching enough to classify. So uhhhh yeah.

——————————————————————————

Admittedly, you were getting attached.

Falling for someone who didn’t exist.

A set of pre recorded lines

that made your heart flutter like no other.

In the grand scheme of things,

his existence seemed inconsequential.

But he was special.

Special to you.

His laughter,

sarcastic remarks and smart quips;

Something no one could replace,

you think.

Playing that silly little game that brings you such joy,

his voice appears,

washing away every doubt in your mind.

Even so,

your heart aches.

Such an intricate thing this game was.

You couldn’t deny

He was everything you wanted,

right there.

Yet so far out of reach.

But you’re okay with that.

Stanley in your place,

While you yearn for someone

because apparently the sibling dynamic is popular I shalt give a crumb of reader waking up

Yk since Space is a hybrid, he lives way longer then any normal human right?

So they can’t grow old together, him and Dib. They can’t grow old together, Dib won’t be with Space till his end. Space will be with Dib till his end though. They probably haven’t even talked about this till they notice the signs. Dib being more slower and not able to keep up with Space. Space still being up and running like nothing despite being older then Dib by at least a year.

So their ship has been doomed from the start

Unless, some weird unmentioned thing happens

TENSE path unlocked

Connor asked Kamski about Jericho and never saved Hank

A snippet I wrote a while back .....Revan after the Leviathan.... for insight into what's up with the sisters, read this ;)

How does one begin to remember? Revan. That was true, he knew, but what was his memory and what was the legend?

The ship was quiet; the others sleeping. Through the Force he felt them, most still radiating a lingering distrust. It came easier now the reaching out, like somehow knowing who he was had flipped a switch and the things he’d once done with ease came back to him in a rush. Aoibhinn was the loudest, felt like cold steel and chaos even as she slept. His sister. Somehow that felt the most logical of all of it, yet also the hardest, a reminder of the other sister he could not yet remember but once had known so well. The one he knew he’d somehow failed.

You called him Alek, Aoibhinn had said. That must mean something, but perhaps only what he didn’t need his memories to know - that Revan and Malak had been friends before they’d been master and apprentice, so he’d of course called the man Alek before the war. Just some residual knowledge seeping through.

His eyes searched the black against his eyelids, looking for that calm quiet center. He needed to remember.

Alek. His voice, younger as was the face close above him. Grass tickled at his ear, a rock poked at the small of his back, but he couldn’t move despite the discomfort of that, or rather didn’t want to, not wanting the other face to leave. For a moment he closed his eyes in the vision, felt the sun across his skin and the heat of something else. Then the face spoke, called him another name, the one from before Revan. His eyes opened to see that face smiling but radiating something else, too, a hunger he wanted to answer.

In the dark of the cargo hold, he raised his hand to touch the face in the dream, saw his past self mirror the motion, Alek. It was just one finger, the barest graze across his cheek and jaw, but enough that it made the other’s eyes blaze. Their bodies were already touching; they’d been wrestling, he thought. The rock in his back stung; his hips shifted almost involuntarily to relieve the pressure of it and….

His eyes flew open in the present, his breath coming in pants. Fuck. He saw now where this was going, the implication of the vision that was really a memory. It hurt. But he needed to know. He forced his breath even, closed his eyes lightly.

It was Dantooine, in the past, some place out in the plains. In the present he knew this memory wasn’t the first time they’d been to this place, but it was the first time they’d come this close to naming the wanting thing between them. Alek. He’d had a head full of hair then and a face that was whole; the ghost of his past self ran his hands through that hair and across that face, emboldened by the pounding of his heart and the hardness against his thigh.

He’d been ashamed at first for being clumsy, all teeth and tongue, but Alek was not. I have to be better at something, he’d laughed. And then it didn’t matter anymore. In the present he ached, remembering that wanting, forced his eyes to open, tried to find a focus on the faint shapes in the dark. Too much.

But the memories chased him anyway; he’d opened the box and couldn’t close it back. Alek’s hair was gone now, but he still had his face, could still smile in that way if he wanted, but never did. They’d ended the war. I’ll follow you, wherever this leads. Alek took his mask and kissed him roughly, the thing between them so heavy. The memories were jumbled, incomplete, but whiffs of true things he knew.

He’s a weakness. What voice was that? His own? Alek’s eyes burned now with something different, their wanting corrupted and jealous. Do not test me. His own voice, so cold, none of the warmth of the time on Dantooine.

Is that what you think this is, Revan, a test? Worried I might best you? The mouth that said those things was twisted and cruel. He’d kissed that mouth, had moaned as that mouth had mapped all of his flesh, still wanted the man who’d been. I’ll follow you….that mouth had promised. And the problem was that he had, followed him right into the abyss and had drowned in it.

Gods no. He knew in his gut what he’d see before the memory came, maybe he’d known as soon as he’d seen Malak on the Leviathan, why he’d wanted him to be Alek despite the impossibility of that. I did this, he said to the dark of the cargo hold. Alek. They’d sparred so many times over the years, Alek one of the few who could best him, maybe the only one now if he fought fair. Weakness. Blades and eyes blazed, Malak’s one to his two. I loved you. Who had said that or had they both? And then it was over; he’d walked away leaving Malak writhing on the floor, his face broken.

I did this, his voice in the present a hoarse whisper. And they were still trying to kill each other, weren’t they? He scrubbed his face, wondered if the masters had known when they sent him to find the maps with false memories in his head. Bile rose in his throat. He could do it now, kill Malak. He’d have to. Malek would be waiting for him on the Star Forge, drinking from the darkness there.

I’ll follow you…

Chapters: 3/3 Fandom: Rurouni Kenshin Rating: Mature Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings Relationships: Himura Kenshin/Kamiya Kaoru Characters: Himura Kenshin, Kamiya Kaoru, Myoujin Yahiko, Sagara Sanosuke, Takani Megumi, Yukishiro Enishi, Sanjou Tsubame Additional Tags: Jinchuu Arc, angst straight ahead, Romance, y'all know our girl is fine right?, but if you're new to the fandom, SPOILERS!!!!! Summary:

She never comes to his dreams.

He really didn't expect her to, but he wanted it badly enough because where else will he be able to see if her? She is gone. Her smile is gone. Her warmth is gone. Her light is gone. Her laughter. Her kindness. Her strength.

His home.

All of that, gone.