#yay-

Sanemi's breath felt constricted, pain shooting through every bone in his body. He curled up onto a ball, gritting his teeth and squeezing his eyes shut. His hands were closed into fists, his nails digging into his skin. Upon his mission, he had encountered Muzan but, of course, Muzan had quickly gained the upperhand. Sanemi had only lasted so long before somehow, at some time, Muzan had seemingly disappeared leaving Sanemi in this contorting, painful position, without a clue as to what had happened.

It felt like days until the pain stopped, but had probably only been hours, minutes, even. Sanemi's body went limp and he blinked wearily up at the sky, trees dotting his peripheral vision. He was in a forest, it was dark. That would change soon as dawn arose.

And then it hit him, like a flash. An urge. To what? He needed something, couldn't think of what. What was he even doing here? What had happened? He sat up wearily. Blood rushed to his head but he ignored it, grabbing his katana that lay on the ground next to him. The blade was coated with his and Muzan's blood. A pang of hunger struck Sanemi, like a pole through his stomach.

He flinched, dropping his katana and scooting away. The smell of the blood was intoxicating, stronger than he'd ever smelled before. It was unnerving, the urge to grab the blade and consume his own blood. He clamped his hand to his mouth, willing himself not to take the blade, run his tongue over it.

He blinked rapidly, digging his teeth into his tongue, shaking his head as if it would stop the truth from coming to him. But he couldn't stop it, couldn't deny a fact. Sanemi had turned into a demon, he knew he had. He had turned into a monster.

×××

Kyojuro was rushing, following his crow's instruction north, he moved quickly. Something had happened to Sanemi and he was sent there immediately. He wondered what had happened. Had Sanemi been careless, gotten himself terribly injured? There wasn't a message of his death, at least, which was a comfort.

The crow guided him through a forest and Kyojuro weaved through the trees towards where he spotted a clearing—quite obviously made by battle. Sensing a demon nearby, he kept his senses on full alert, watching. He saw Sanemi at the edge of the clearing, hunched over and backed against a tree. Something was off.

"Shinazugawa!!" Kyojuro shouted, sprinting into the clearing.

Sanemi looked up. And it felt like the whole world had crashed upon Kyojuro's shoulders.

Demonic symbols stretched across Sanemi's face, his pupils looked unlike his own; cat-like. Demon-like. He had his teeth sunk into his own lip with two teeth potruding further. Fangs. His arms were wrapped around his knees that were drawn up to his chest and he looked constricted, as if in two minds at once.

For a moment, Kyojuro did not know what to do. He couldn't think, could only stand there helplessly, his hands clutching limply at his katana. 

And then Sanemi spoke, his voice hoarse and pained. "Just... just kill me already, Rengoku," he whispered.

Kyojuro flinched at the words, shaking his head rapidly. "No, no, I..." How could he explain it? He simply couldn't bring himself to be the cause of Sanemi's death. Even if he was a demon. "Have you even eaten anyone..?"

Sanemi shook his head, pressing his lips together. "No. Not yet. Kill me before I do, you know that's how... Those are the rules," he gritted out.

"I... I can't!" Kyojuro insisted, a pleading tone entering his voice.

"Why the fuck not?!" Sanemi shouted.

"You haven't attacked me yet! You can be like Nezuko"—he stepped forward slightly—"Please, Shinazugawa, try!!" 

Sanemi's eyes met his for an instant before he shook his head turning slightly and picking up the tree he had been leaning against throwing it towards Kyojuro so that he skidded backwards, dust and dirt clouding his vision.

"I can't do that," Sanemi said, his voice ringing through the clearing. "It's already taking all my strength not to kill you right now. The urge to consume blood is high, I fucking cannot. Either you kill me now or regret everything. I'm not me, I'm not... I'm a fucking monster now, believe it, Rengoku."

Kyojuro's arm was held up to his mouth as he coughed, waving his other hand around to clear the dust from the air. He heard footsteps approaching him slowly and, though he knew it was Sanemi, he held up his katana.

The cloud of dirt cleared enough for Sanemi's figure to be seen. He stalked over to Kyojuro and, upon closer inspection, could be seen that his hands were shaking. He lifted his hands and, with sudden force, pushed Kyojuro against a tree, glowering down at him. 

"Listen, you little fuck. I don't give a fuck if you 'can't' kill me, you either do it now or risk the lives of so many others. I can only hold back for so fucking long," Sanemi hissed, his eyes narrowed. 

Kyojuro shook his head and, although keeping his stance strong—despite being pinned to a tree,—he found himself trembling. Not from fear rather, from holding back tears. He had grown to feel affection towards Sanemi, albeit never acting upon it, and he couldn't bear to be the one to kill him. He knew this was wrong; went against every rule he had grown up to follow. Yet he couldn't help but feel like, if he were to kill Sanemi, he could never live with it. Guilt would follow him like his shadow, never leaving his side. Except, unlike a shadow, it would only grow bigger in the darkest hours. 

He lifted a shaky hand, his katana raised to defend himself. From what? His own fears?

Sanemi forced Kyojuro's hand down slightly, guiding his hand to press the katana to his symbol-framed neck.

"Do it," Sanemi spat, "just fucking do it."

A pang of sorrow flashed through Kyojuro's body. Sanemi wouldn't stop, would he? He would persist, he wouldn't let himself-

A growl escaped Sanemi's throat and he retreated suddenly, raising a hand to his mouth. His eyes met Kyojuro's, he looked... insane. 

"Go," he whispered. "GO!!"

Kyojuro shook his head, his grip on his katana tightening. "No, I can't leave, Shinazu-"

Sanemi lunged at him, his eyes flicking about. 

Kyojuro stumbled backwards, hitting the tree behind him. He quickly regained his stance, slipping towards the middle of the clearing. Sanemi followed him, seemingly unwillingly, moving in an odd way, advancing towards Kyojuro and then backtracking.

Kyojuro held his katana up in front of him as Sanemi circled around him, his teeth bared like an animal. His eyes held a crazed look, he no longer looked like himself. Like a Hashira. Ah. He was no longer a Hashira, no longer human. He was a demon now. But not yet a monster. No, no he wasn't until he tried killing someone. A person. Yes, he'd tried attacking Kyojuro, but hadn't Nezuko taken a bit to control herself too? There was still hope. Please, let there be hope.

Sanemi rushed forward and Kyojuro barely dodged him, ducking under and standing behind the fallen tree. He sheathed his katana, deciding he'd rather not hurt Sanemi, despite that even if he did he would regenerate. Something flashed in Kyojuro's peripheral vision and he turned towards the movement. The tree had been sliced in half and pushed apart, revealing a silhouette of the man whom he loved against the dust. 

The air parted and Sanemi darted towards him. And then his face was clear and Kyojuro saw that tears dotted Sanemi's cheeks, his expression pained, his teeth gritted together.

"I don't... fucking... understand you," Sanemi whispered, his eyes landing upon Kyojuro's empty hands.

"I'm sorry, Shinazugawa. I cannot kill you," Kyojuro said quietly, side-stepping Sanemi's fist.

"YOU IDIOT!!" Sanemi shouted, tears now flowing freely from his eyes. "Do you want to know why you're not dead yet?! Why I haven't fucking lost full control of myself and killed you already?!" 

Kyojuro flinched, biting back a sob as he pressed his back against a tree. He was surrounded, by the forest and Sanemi. "Why..?" he asked meekly, his voice shaking. He was going against every rule, every warning, every fact. Yet he couldn't help it, couldn't bring himself to unsheathe his katana, to kill Sanemi.

"BECAUSE I FUCKING LOVE YOU!!" Sanemi screamed, his hand clamping upon Kyojuro's shoulder. 

At those words, Kyojuro felt all his strength give way, his body falling limp against the tree. 

"I FUCKING LOVE YOU AND IT'S TAKING MY EVERY WILL TO NOT TEAR YOU TO PIECES," Sanemi shotued, his grip tightening painfully. "AND... and..."—he blinked rapidly—"and I could never forgive myself if I did anything. But I can't fight longer. I need you to kill me." 

Tears pricked Kyojuro's eyes as he shook his head. "I can't," he repeated. "I'm sorry." 

Sanemi's gaze hardened. "I'm sorry, too," he whispered and, with a sudden force, tore Kyojuro's arm from his body, earning a gritted scream from the Flame user. Blood spilled from his shoulder and he sucked in a breath, trying to control his breathing, feeling lightheaded from the pain.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," Sanemi was mumbling, bringing the arm up to his mouth. He hesitated, for a second, before plunging his teeth into it, devouring Kyojuro's arm in a second.

Kyojuro shakily reached for his katana, gripping the handle tightly with his one arm. He stood, kicking Sanemi away—who was back on his feet in an instant—and fixed his stance, the bloodflow from his shoulder pausing. His whole side was drenched in his own blood and he raised his remaining arm, getting ready to strike.

Sanemi seemed in two parts willing to die and wanting to attack as he lunged for Kyojuro whom dodged as quickly as he could, slashing his katana towards the demon. Blood dripped from Sanemi's collarbone for a second before the wound healed. He looked angry, pouncing on Kyojuro and pinning him to the ground. (gay)

Kyojuro used his legs to propell Sanemi off, his grip on his katana tightening as he moved forwards to behead Sanemi. Sanemi noticed this and, managing to supress himself, stayed still as he could. But then, at the last minute, when Kyojuro's katana was half way through his neck, his instincts took over and he moved his arm forwards with as much strength as he could. plunging his fist through Kyojuro's stomach.

Kyojuro's body trembled and he struggled to push his katana through, being with one arm and a hole through his body. Sanemi, fear lacing his eyes, raised his hand and pushed Kyojuro's katana through his own neck, his head toppling down. 

Finally free from his own body—no, not his body, not when he couldn't even control it—Sanemi uttered endless apologies, tears streaming down his face as he took in the damage he'd done to Kyojuro. Kyojuro, whom he loved, whom he'd throw his own life away to. Kyojuro, who was going to die next to him, because of him.

Kyojuro had collapsed to the ground, the adrenaline from the fight leaving him. He crawled over to Sanemi's slowly disintigrating head, placing a shaky hand on Sanemi's cheek.

"I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm sorry," Sanemi whispered into Kyojuro's palm. "I'm so, so sorry." 

Kyojuro shook his head. "It's... not your fault," he murmured between gasping breaths, his eyes fluttering close. Tears dotted his eyelashes, the dim light making them shine ever so slightly.

"It is. It is, and I'm sorry. I'm so fucking sorry," Sanemi mumbled, closing his eyes as well, his body nearly fully gone. 

In the distance, he might've heard shouting. But he couldn't be sure, he didn't know, as darkness engulfed him and he felt no more.

Life and color faded from Kyojuro's body, blood now flowing freely from his stomach and arm, and he took a last shaky breath before fading away.

×××

Senjuro had invited Genya over, both knowing full well their elder brothers were closer than they let on. The two had fun talking about them, just admiring how both of their brothers were Hashira, were so strong and amazing. They opted to go out on a walk after a while, deciding that getting some fresh air was nice. It was almost sunrise as well, so they were both safe from the demons and eager to see the sun as it ascended into the sky. 

Genya noted that there was this forest where, if you went a bit higher to a hill, you could get a clear view of the horizon. He said that he had once followed Sanemi whilst trying to talk to him and had found the place in the process.

Senjuro agreed to go there and left a note to his father that he would be out.

The two walked cheerfully along the road, quickly finding the said forest. Genya pointed out that they should just go right through the trees since finding a path that would actually lead them where they wanted to go might end up in them not finding the hill on time. So they went, chattering happily as they did. 

There was some commotion somewhere up ahead, which caused the two to walk a bit faster. Because who the hell would be creating so much noise in the middle of a forest before the sun was even up??

Worrying it was to do with a demon, Genya urged Senjuro to hurry, taking out his katana. He held it tightly in front of him as they weaved through the forest, coming to a stop at a fallen tree. They went around it, finding that it was a clearing. There was a lot of destruction and... blood.

Senjuro and Genya scampered around the tree, their eyes setting on two figures on the opposite end of the clearing, a pool of blood surrounding them. And then they realized who it was, the familiar flamey hair, the spiky white of another's...

"SANEMI!!!" Genya cried out, as Senjuro shouted his own brother's name.

They rushed forward, kneeling upon next to their brothers. Sanemi was disintegrating, like a demon. Both his and Kyojuro's eyes were closed, their blood surrounding their bodies.

"No... No, NO!" Genya grasped at Sanemi's haori, the last thing left of his brother whom had disappeared into the air. 

Senjuro's shaky hands rolled Kyojuro over, finding his wounds too fatal to be fixed, an arm gone, his stomach open and spilling out. He skittered back at the sight, feeling nauseous. He brought his arm up to his mouth, pressing the back of his hand to his lips, shaking. Genya and Senjuro's eyes met, their gazes trailing down to the bodies—or clothes—of their brothers. 

Kyojuro, who had been the Rengokus' pride and joy, with his wide, bright eyes and cheerful smiles. Kyojuro, who had once saved Genya, had treated him like a brother, had invited him over to see Senjuro. Who had been so supportive of the both of them, cheered them on despite the two's flaws, had grown to be such a wonderful man... 

And Sanemi. Sanemi who had cared for Genya despite everything, had saved him, had risked his whole life just for Genya. Sanemi who had treated Senjuro so kindly, who had comforted him while Kyojuro was away and his father had been mistreating him. Sanemi who was all Genya was living for, all Genya ever needed in his life...

Gone. They were both gone. Their last breaths had been taken, Kyojuro's body was pale and cold, blood still seeping out. Sanemi was all but literally gone, dispersed into nothing, leaving behind only his clothes. 

Then there was Senjuro and Genya. Their bodies shaking with unshed tears, faces contorted in the most sorrowed expressions to exist, grief lacing every bone in them. They huddled together, sharing their pain. Tears flowed freely down their faces, hoping beyond hope that none of this was true, that it was all a dream; but they knew it wasn't. They had just lost... everything. 

×××

« Word count: 2671 »

Idk i lost concentration like at the last 3 paragraphs so if it doesn't make sense that's my fault 😭