#wsj23

It’s the little things about the jamboree that I miss the most. I miss sleeping under the shade of the dome, waking up to see those silly boys still sleeping near me. I had never felt so safe and comfortable but I did. I miss taking hourly runs to the market and getting my favorite vanilla ice cream sandwich wrapped in a cake cone (which is still an awesome invention to me and still blows my mind) and a bottle of Aquarius (because I liked that better than Pocari Sweat, which was an unpopular opinion). I miss Sammy, the man who I thought felt superior to me but treated me like I was just as great as him, and reminded me about how strong I was. I miss how he was overlooking the entire ITS department but still managed to take time out of his day to talk to me and make sure I was feeling better. I still hold a little grudge on him for not telling me that he left the jamboree, but there is one thing that he told me that I will cherish always: his quote, “Resilience is one of the most important drivers of success in life.” I miss eating spontaneous dinners with Bob as he talked to me about law school and quizzed me on historical facts I never could remember. I miss the way he made me feel stupid, because at the same time, I was still able to laugh and joke around with him. I miss the little animals he would carry around in his pencil case, and I will never forget the adorable family picture he sent me. If I end up going to law school, I know who to thank. It’s you, Bob. I miss the most important part of the camping trip: the job I had at ICT. I remember how miserable I felt in the beginning, thinking, “why do I have to clean up trash? Why do I have to clean the bathrooms?” But then I realized, when it all comes down to it, it wasn’t as bad as I thought it was. With meeting new people and suffering with my friends, doing the dirty work wasn’t intolerable. I miss trying to communicate with my boss, Gan-chan, and having to resort to translation from Rich instead. I miss all the little treats they gave us, from icy cold drinks to the best ice cream I had ever tasted. I miss trying fermented soybeans for the first time with Gan-chan and Isaac, even though it was pretty disgusting. I remember exchanging glances with Isaac while Gan-chan stared at us with our every bite, grinning and saying how much he loved it himself. I miss Dom’s adorable face and how he would talk about how the accent that comes from his hometown (Birmingham) was the ugliest compared to other places in the UK. I regret not spending more time with Dom, Malia, and Phil. I miss all the stories Jemuel and Jevon told me. I miss not being able to stop laughing when Jemuel told me about how he tricked his friends into going to a trip to the hot springs, where they had to bathe naked, while discovering that Jevon was one of the guys Jemuel had tricked. I miss going to the Izakaya with Isaac, Jemuel, Peirong, and my jamboree family: Ross and Jeff (my two gay dads) and Alex (my brother), bringing one of the most memorable nights of the jamboree. I remember how I ordered two strawberry cocktail drinks, and was freaking out because I was the only one who was underage. I was the youngest one there, and seeing everyone care about me and look over me was truly a wonderful experience. I miss how Rainbow Cafe had the most people every night despite the muddy ground that everyone had to step over. I regret not spending enough time at the Rainbow Cafe, because I know that I could’ve met so many more friends if I had spent a night there. If I could redo the jamboree, I would be sure to spend at least one evening there, hearing others’ stories and telling some of mine as well. I miss walking into town and hanging out in supermarkets and eating sushi with all my friends. I miss taking the bullet train to Hiroshima and spending the hot, sunny day with friends and taking an entire three hour ride back. I miss holding Jason’s hand and feeling scared that people would find out about us. I miss the nights I spent with Jason even though it proved to fail afterwards. That’s okay though, because I think after all that Jason and I had been through, it just made me stronger and more resilient as I dealt with the feeling of loneliness thousands of miles away from home.

“The real way to gain happiness is to give it to others.”