seen from Germany
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seen from New Zealand
seen from United States
*kicks down toaster's door* What's up dick head time to go to the dreaming city.
“That’s the place in the fucking black hole.”
“Fuck no. I may have no functioning fear response and the self preservation instinct of a dodo with a vore fetish but I’ve already told you I don’t fucks with no black holes.”
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Got to remember that I'm immortal, buddy
“Y’know funny thing, a lot of people have a tendency to say that. Then they meet me.”
“And I have a tendency to prove them very, very wrong.”
Big gun dumb. I could walk away from it.
“...”
“You have no idea what relativistic velocities actually implies do you? There’s no maximum effective range for this weapon. You can’t just ‘walk away’ from it. Shortstack Exo dumb.”
Light is cool and you're just jealous.
A thud rings out as Toaster places something between them. Some kind of weapon almost as long as the Cyborg is tall. It has four barrels, and is partially held together with duct tape.
“This is the Quad Projected Particle Cannon. It’s a multi-beam particle weapon powered by a back-mounted radioisotope thermoelectric generator, capable of accelerating heavy particles to relativistic velocities through use of a microwave resonator array. This weapon causes a roughly controlled extinction event wherever it hits.” He explained.
“So would you care to explain why I’d be jealous of some rinky-dink magical girl powers and a bootleg Guilty Spark when I can carry my very own portable first, second, third, and fourth impact?” He tapped each barrel in turn as he spoke.
Funny you should mention a gun that shoots bees. Just yesterday I picked up a gun that shoots robot bees that consume everything
“But do they pollinate flowers?”
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⬅️
“Listen I’ve told you once, I’ll tell you again, I’m not using a bloody sword.” The Cyborg stated, shaking his head. “Swords are fucking impractical in any combat situation when guns are available and are only utilised by edgy fuck knuckles. If you want a sword fight go bother an Eliksni or something, fuck off.”
✘
The Cyborg’s eyes slowly cracked open, and he groaned, feeling like he’d been hit with a large sledgehammer. He sat up and looked around, only to notice a certain Exo lying next to him.
“...Your fast food has some weird stuff in it dude.”
"O' Reader mine, what spoils do you bring? What more can you offer? Your heart? Your mind? Your soul? All these things chewed up and spat out years ago. Now you are left. And I will take that too."
....UUMM...
ARE YOU... ASKING ME OUT? IN POEM FORM?
I’M FLATTERED, BUT I’LL HAVE TO DECLINE. MY HEART BELONGS TO ALL THE JUNK I’VE YET TO COLLECT
