Great Wilcox Cartoon... Becoming more relevant every hour ..
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Stonekettle Station
Jim Wright
How about that ... speech?
Sure, let's call it a speech, not the kind of dementia-addled 19 minutes of white-knuckled bug-eating insanity that a Roman Emperor might have given after generations of inbreeding, utterly insulated from reality, and a lifetime of lead contaminated water.
A speech!
A public address. An update on the war's progress. Huzzah!
Like a sane and rational president might give. Sure, lets call it that. Why the hell not?
A great speech. Oh yes. One for the ages!
Trump says he'll end the war "shortly." Two weeks, maybe, the standard Republican Time Unit. Two weeks. Two weeks to come up with a Republican healthcare plan. Two weeks for national infrastructure legislation. Two weeks to peace and prosperity. Two weeks to Trump's new Golden Age of America!
In Republican Land, we're always just two weeks away from Making America Great Again.
Trump, a student of history, tells us the war is a big success. It's going great. So great. Like nothing no one has never seen before! Better than Vietnam! More bombs than World War I and II combined! Maybe even bigger than the Battle of Bowling Green or when the colonists took those Revolutionary War airports.
And you know that's true, because this morning oil prices are surging and the stocks are falling. But don't you worry, America, oil will come down and stocks will go up. In two weeks.
"Iran's navy is gone! Their air force is in ruins! Their leaders, most of them and the terrorist regime they led, are now dead," reports Trump, a military genius.
I, for one, am glad to hear it. No way they'll be able to reconstitute their nuclear weapons program and be just "two weeks" away from getting a bomb. Right before an American election. No way that'll happen. Again.
So, with that out of the way, we should be able to get back to those Epstein files, right? In two weeks, probably.
"We are going to hit them extremely hard over the next two to three weeks. We’re going to bring them back to the stone ages where they belong" declares Trump, the peacemaker.
Certain people deserve to live in the stone ages [sic]. Not the billionaires, of course. They're God's chosen. They deserve to live in golden towers and their own space programs and many, many tax breaks. But some people, peasants you might call them, they deserve a life of toil and mud and poverty.
Like it says in the Bible.
Also, if their navy is gone, the air force is in ruins, their leaders are dead, who then are we bombing into the Stone Age? Children? Old people? Civilians? The very same people Trump expects to rise up, overthrow their religiously fanatical leaders and build an America-loving secular society from the rubble? Those people?
I don't know. I've seen a lot of war, but I don't have an uncle who was a professor at MIT so maybe that's why I can't figure out how you bomb people into democracy.
"They're (Iran) going to want to be able to sell oil because that's all they have to try and rebuild. It will resume the flowing and the gas prices will rapidly come back down. Stock prices will rapidly go back up," says Trump, in the same dismissive confident tone as Hitler in the Bunker telling his staff how Steiner's assault will turn the tide of WWII.
And how Iran selling their oil benefits anyone but Iran and China, or opens the Strait, is left as an exercise for the listener.
Trump tells us yet again how the Strait of Hormuz isn't our problem. Let someone else take care of that mess and boy it just don't get any more Republican than that, does it? I was waiting to Trump to tell us how he'd crashed all the banks and blown up the auto industry and it was somehow our job as taxpayers to bail them out again and blame the next Democrat president for it.
You got to wonder how Trump's pal Mohammed bin Salman Al Saud feels about the Strait not being OUR problem.
"Because of the actions we have taken we are on the cusp of ending Iran's sinister threat to America and the world," Trump, an expert on sinister threats, assures us.
On the cusp.
So, haven't eliminated ALL Iran's military then, I guess. Haven't changed all of their leadership. Haven't opened the Strait. Haven't gotten ALL of their nuclear material, or any of it actually. Technically. Still some resistance. Still some fight left in them.
But we're on the cusp. The CUSP indeed.
Trust us. Just two more weeks.












