Mar 24, 2020
Lmao during this quarantine my mom is now super addicted to whatsapp and she won't stop reading those forward msgs and poems and shit about coronavirus
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Lmao during this quarantine my mom is now super addicted to whatsapp and she won't stop reading those forward msgs and poems and shit about coronavirus
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I'm watching The Hobbit 3 with my mother...
And in the scene where Bard and his son fall in the water, she says: don't forget to put the beans in water.
Me: you remembered that because they fell???
#parentsbelike
Mom: you got an 89 on your bio quiz, I’m gonna need u to study more ok
Me: ok
10 minutes later
Mom: ok so we’re all going to the beach
Me: I actually need to take a shower and do my weekend homework
Mom: . . .
Me: so I’m gonna have to stay home-
Mom, w/ the flames of hell in her eyes: oh hERE WE GO ANOTHER EXCUSE TO SKIP OUT ON THE FAMILY
Me: but you just said-
Mom: THERES NO WAY YOU ACTUALLY HAVE WORK TO DO, WHAT ARE U EVEN STUDYING FOR
Me: the thing you toLD ME-
Mom: STOP TALKING BACK I DONT WANT TO HEAR IT
"That candelabra did not just find its way up your asshole."
-My mother, on the sexual deviance of others
acne 4/7 ugh this was such an uncomfortable conversation i still cringe inside when i think about it.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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The look of betrayal. #whymomwhy #puppymomlife
Some dogs came in costume today. Not that they felt too great about it. #dumbledore #mitchelthedog #magiciseverywhere #whymomwhy #halloween (at Sweet Maria's Coffee)
We're in the middle of a hurricane and my mom thinks the most important thing for me to do is clean my room.