#where is the plot

You entered the cave of Excalibur, attempting to squeeze the water out from your pants. You approached the stone in the center as it seemed to be surrounded by a sheath of pure light.

You inhaled, sighing slowly to steady yourself. You reached forward, grasping the handle of the sword. Wrapping both hands around the handle you tugged, arms straining.

With slight recoil the sword slowly pulled itself out of the stone. You squinted as pure light filled your senses. You felt a force push you as you fell to the ground, staring in awe as a figure began to emerge from the beams.

As you open your eyes the sight is...underwhelming, to say the least. The Holy Excalibur you had heard so much about couldn't be taller than three feet. Lanky, all white with black beady eyes resembling a plush toy. And the cane and top hat? It just looked plain foolish.

You begin to extend your hand, "Are you the Holy Sword Excalibur? I'm a student at DWMA and I was hoping to-"

"Fool!" Excalibur interrupts. "Who else other than the Holy Sword Excalibur could appear to you in a shroud of light? Now tell me why you are here, fame, wealth, power? Something surely only I can assist you with."

You reached for your bag. "Actually I just wanted to interview you for a class!" You pulled out a notebook and your favorite pen. "We're researching ancient meisters and all the books in the library were rented out."

Excalibur froze, somewhere in the distant you heard a breeze whistle by despite the lack of a draft for a cave.

You pondered possibly shaking him before Excalibur thrust his arm forward in a dramatic pose. "Fool!"

Excalibur turned to you, leaning forward on his cane. "Very well I shall tell you the tale of the Holy Sword Excalibur! It began on a Wednesday. Or maybe a Thursday? Sunday sounds heroic but I can't be certain it wasn't a Saturday. Perhaps Monday? But Friday sounds so much better..."

For three hours straight you were sat listening to tales that made no sense. People that never became important, and the singing, oh my death the singing...you couldn't take it anymore.

So once you had gotten all the information you needed (or lack there of) you decided to leave. Excalibur tried to sway you into staying, promising fame, power, glory and riches. But the one thing he couldn't promise you was an A on your paper which was really all you needed at the time.

You had thought that would be the end of it, a boring afternoon and a mediocre paper you would have to beg Sid to take pity on you for. You never knew how wrong you could be.

The next morning you woke up to the sound of your alarm. You padded down the hall to your apartment and flicked the light on in the bathroom. Grabbing your toothbrush you plopped a glob of toothpaste on and checked the state of last night's pimple patch in the mirror.

As you reached for a tube at the edge of the counter you noticed your shower curtain move out of the corner of your eye. You put your toothbrush down and turned around and...you shut your eyes and shook your head.

You sighed and slowly peeled your eyes open, after all you surely couldn't have seen what you thought you saw. Oh how wrong you were for the second time.

Your shower curtain was indeed moving. And after pulling it back you discovered Excalibur was not only in your bathroom, no. He was taking a bubble bath with a rubber duck you didn't even own.

You screamed like a banshee, swatting at air. Shock, denial, anger, bargaining, depression, testing and acceptance don't even begin to explain away the flashes of emotion going through you in that moment.

This was the beginning of the most bizarre day of your life.

Wherever you went, Excalibur was some how around the corner. Trying to turn in your paper to Sid? Excalibur was snatching it from your hands and pointing out the inaccuracies of it, somehow getting his hands on a red marker to scribble corrections.

The worst part was the corrections weren't even right.

You had tried everything to get rid of Excalibur. Simply asking him to leave obviously didn't work. First, you asked Hero how he managed to get Excalibur to leave him alone. But Hero's repulsion to constant sneezing unfortunately wouldn't work for the current situation. So after forcing Hero to endure another one of Excalibur's songs with you he recommended that you see if you can just force Excalibur to leave.

So you went to Lord Death...except Lord Death was busy. So you sought out professor Stein, the second strongest of all the weapons and meisters at the academy. At the very least you figured Stein would find Excalibur to be an interesting test subject to dissect. But alas, the mad scientist with little whim to do anything that didn't please him turned out to be less than helpful. Not only did he essentially tell you that it was your problem to fix, but he struck up a conversation with Excalibur on extinct species he "wished he could have experimented on."

Slowly but surely you went meister to meister seeing if anyone had any idea of what to do. Maka and Soul had no idea how to handle Excalibur, Liz and Patty were grossed out by Excalibur, Ox and Harvard were about as helpful as they usually were, even Kim and Jackie were unwilling to help you out after their last encounters with Excalibur.

So you were on your own, wandering around the school aimlessly for solutions that seemed to be evading you. You sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose, ready to give up for the time being when you heard a pair of familiar voices.

"Look!! The funny thing with the hat is back!!"

"Why is it so short? It looks silly."

You looked up to see the twins Fire and Thunder running towards you with a speed you didn't know was possible for kids their age. Excalibur, seemingly not amused by the elementary schools chasing after him, disappeared behind a corner before the twins could reach the two of you. You let out a breathy laugh, half relief and half exhaustion.

The twins stopped at your feet, looking up at you confused and dissapointed.

"Where did the funny hat thing go?" Fire pouted.

"Yeah, I was gonna fix his hair." Thunder frowned.

You fought back a smile, not wanting to poke fun at what is likely to them a serious disappointment. "The funny hat man is looking for something right now and I'm trying to help him figure out what."

The twins nodded, seemingly taking in the new information given to them and greatly considering it.

"Fire! Thunder! How many times have I told you two not to run off? We've got to be at the training grounds soon."

You turned to see Kilik walking towards you, hands in his pockets relaxed. He stopped a few paces before you, reach up to scratch the back of his neck. "Sorry about them, I heard Excalibur's been following you around, he gone for now?"

"I think so, thank Death. Must've not been in the mood for a makeover." You slumped against the wall. "You wouldn't happen to know how to get rid of him would you? Could you fight him again and make him leave?"

Kilik chuckled, "you remember the last time anyone tried to take on Excalibur? Didn't go well, and he had Hero as a meister of all people."

You shrugged, "worth a shot."

Kilik crossed his arms, leaning against the wall next to you. "But I think Excalibur left Hero alone because he stopped doing what he wanted. Do you know what exactly Excalibur wants."

You furrowed your brows, thinking quickly. "No, I don't think so. I just found him in my bathroom this morning and he's been following me around ever since.

Kilik hummed, "well maybe you should just ask Excalibur what he wants. I mean there isn't much to lose in trying." A short buzz sound came from Kilik's phone. "Shoot, I'm sorry we've gotta go. Thunder, Fire, it's time to head out."

"No worries, thanks for the tip!" You waved as the three began to walk away, not before both Fire and Thunder gave you hi-fives.

Kilik waved back. "No problem, good luck by the way. If you still need someone to fight Excalibur later we can give it another shot."

You stood back up from the wall with a sudden new purpose. As if on cue Excalibur walked back out into the hallway, a cup of tea in his hands (to this day you don't where it came from.)

Excalibur took a breath, extending his cane as if he were to break out into song again.

"What do I have to do for you to leave me alone," you deadpanned.

Excalibur stared at you for a moment before pointing his cane into the ground. "FOOL! Allow me to think."

"Oka-"

"Fool! I require a party."

Your eye twitched. "You have got to be kidd-"

"A tea party! It will be the talk of the globe for decades to come!"

"I have a couple of Lipton teabags, uncrustables and matching mugs."

"...I suppose that will do."

And with that you were met with yet another strange scenario: a tea party with the Holy Sword Excalibur.

It wasn't anything fancy by any means, just as you'd promised. You sat on a blanket on a hill by the back of the DWMA. You watched Excalibur stare at his teacup with the same blank expression he gives anything. However you could absolutely feel the animosity Excalibur had for the sad little pathetic limp Lipton tea bag in its light blue mug.

The nicest thing about this odd little tea party was probably the view, acres upon acres of lush trees, flowers and a gentle breeze picking up the scent of spring and morning dew.

You took another bite out of your uncrustable. "You want anymore tea?" You teased Excalibur, dangling another tea bag.

Excalibur put his mug on the ground, beginning to stand up. "I believe that will be quite alright. Thank you for your...hospitality but I must be off. The legendary tales of Excalibur must continue!"

You nodded, shocked that not once had you been corrected on your posture or your failure to stick out your pink when holding your mug.

Once Excalibur was out of sight your phone buzzed with a notification. Your screen glowed as you opened your grade book to see that Sid had just graded your paper. You had gotten a B minus...

Yeah, none of this was worth it.

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Summary: 

Y/n knows that Pamela is bad for her but she can't help but keep coming back. Everytime shes with her shes just mesmerised and quite addicted to the redhead. No matter how bad she is for her, she can't help but love her and want more.

Pamela feels the same way, and she knows just how dangerous she is. She goes over to Y/n' apartment intent on ending things this time because despite the love she feels for Y/n she doesn't want her to get hurt or to drag her further into this mess.

But it doesn't quite work out, it's too late for that now. Especially when Y/n shows up to the Gotham dam just to get the woman back.

Pairing: FxF 

Pamela didn't want to do this, but it had to be done. She didn't want you to get involved in more of her plans or hurt you anymore than she already had. Holding a plant pot with white tulips in it, she had bought these along as an apology gift. And maybe that wouldn't work after what shes about to tell you, but it was worth a try. 

The redhead really loves you that she stood outside your apartment door for five minutes contemplating whether this was the right move. Because she had tried this many times before but it never lasts because you're all over each other the next day. And Pamela Isley crying? That was rather unheard of, but then again she can be vunerable around you the way you are with her at times. Knocking on your door, she sighed heavily. Knowing that what she was about to do, end it for real...would break the both of you. But she was strong and so were you. "Pam, what are you doing here? It's eleven p.m at night. I thought you were busy with plans." Y/n greets her. Allowing the redhead to enter you closed the door behind Pamela. 

With the look on the redheads face, you were rather concerned and just as you were about to say something, Pamela interrupted with her own words. "Y/n, you know I love you, right?" She says, looking down at the white tulips she had in the plant pot for a couple seconds before looking you in the eyes. "Yeah of course, whats wrong?" You asked her, to be honest you probably knew what was coming. You knew those tulips meant forgiveness, it was a reoccurring thing between the two of you. What did she do this time? And whats with those because she hadn't done anything to upset you...yet. 

"Y/n, listen. We can't do this anymore okay? I don't want to end things but I just can't get you involved in any of my plans anymore. It's dangerous, I'm dangerous. And I don't want you to get hurt, anymore than you already have. I can't go through you being seriously injured or emotionally hurt again. I don't want that for you." Pamela explains, as she puts the plant pot down on the kitchen table. 

The Poison Ivy shedding a tear? Who would've thought. You just stood there not really knowing what to say, but you sure as hell weren't doing too well right now. The woman you love and also spent half your University years with had just broken up with you...and it seemed for good this time, to what? Protect you from her? 

"Pam, please don't. We're already too far into this now. I don't care, all I want is you. I'm too far deep in this with you and I can't lose you, so please don't." You were holding back quite a lotof tears but, two fell down your cheeks. Pamela looking at you, she was taller so you had to look up a slight bit. The two of your hearts shattered. The Poison Ivy didn't have to pretend to be tough or pretend that this was what she wanted around you, she could just be Pamela Isley. "It's so toxic, what we're doing to each other, the amount of times I've hurt you." Pamela replies, her voice breaking a little.

"And maybe it is, but please don't go. And you can't take all the blame, Pam. We may have hurt each other so much but regardless I still love you." You added, trying not to cry even more. But there were no words left to say, and with that came a last kiss, she placed her soft hands on your face and kissed you. She didn't want this to end, and neither did you. It was so hard to pull away. "Goodbye Y/n, maybe someday we can revive this but not for a long time" were her last words to you before she walked out of your door and possibly out of your life forever. 

The whole night you had just layed in bed and cried, you took the white tulips in the plant pot she gave you and put it on your bed side table, just staring at them until whenever you would pass out from crying yourself to sleep. Pamela, however, wiped away her tears and tried to put up a facade that she was completely fine when in reality her heart was shattered, oh she had one? Well of course she did, she just broke her own heart along with the woman she loves, but it was for the best. She tried to tell herself that Y/n was just a distraction from the plans she has for Gotham City. Getting ready for what she has in store tommorrow, ignoring her emotions and putting them on hold. ~~~~ You were determined to get Pamela back, last night you had sucked it up and stopped crying. You can't stay away from her and she can't stay away from you for long either and the both of you knew that. The redhead may literally be toxic but she's your addiction and you can't just let her go that easily. Getting dressed after a quick shower, watering the plant she had given you so that she doesn't kill you later for forgetting. You knew exactly where she would be and you'd be damned to let her get away that easily. 

Sure, you're putting yourself in a dangerous situation but it was worth it for the woman you loved. Getting in your car, you drove all the way to Gotham Dam. And just as you suspected she was there. While she was turned around and distracted, you snuck up behind her...and yeah maybe that was a bad move considering she could literally attack you with vines for doing so, in case you were an enemy. But you stood your ground. 

"No" was all you simply said, stood there with your arms crossed, the redhead turned around and chuckled, rolling her eyes. Folding her arms, she even knew that you wouldn't stay away or let her get away like that. "What are you doing here?" She asked, she didn't need to say 'how did you know I'd be here?' Because she already knew the answer to that one. The redhead in front of you barely showed any emotion, you knew that meant she put up a facade and locked her emotions completely off, possibly apart from anger. 

"No, you don't get to do that to us. I'm with you for the long haul. And yes maybe we're toxic, you certainly are quite literally." That part made Pamela chuckle, you saw a slight smile creep upon her lips. "You are impossible and so irritable sometimes" Pamela adds, her eyes rolling at you. Part of her knew that you would do this, and she wasn't the least bit un-impressed with it. In fact she knew you would do this anyway. You don't give up easily and thats one of the many things she loves about you. "Pam, I am so addicted to you, you know that. I can't stay away from you and you could certainly try and stay away from me, but we both know thats impossible. With the amount of times we've been through this situation. I'm kind of sick of it, it's getting old." You reply, telling the redhead woman like it is. She was shocked with the words you came out with, but the smirk on her face told you another thing. 

"Fuck this" you added, practically jumping at Pamela she caught you in her arms, you legs wrapped around her waist. Nobody was around and even if there were people around the dam then Pamela would've taken care of them, and by that either kill them or just knock them out for quite a while. Pamela began to kiss you, backing you up against one of the walls of the entrance to the dam, the kiss as always was fierce, a bit of pent up agression and tension she had to get out, the same with you, really. "We really can't stay away from each other can we?" Pamela whispers when she pulls away.

"No" you let out a sigh the moment her lips were on your neck. Maybe you were distracting her from the plan she had in mind, but this was all worth it. "We'll continue this later, I'm expecting company. I know Batwoman will be on her way." Pamela pulls away from your neck, she smirked at you and you knew then and there she left atleast a few marks. With you still in her arms, your legs wrapped around her waist she smiles "You're going to stay aren't you?" she asks, knowing that you weren't going to leave here without her. "Yes, I am. I'm all in remember?" You replied, you may not have the abilities of a super villain or anti-hero, but you can atleast fight, you weren't completely hopeless.

"Okay, but if you get hurt once, go okay? I promise I'll be okay" Pamela adds, as if she knew that Batwoman was on her way. Then again she can sense things with plants around her, or just mother nature in general. You knew she was powerful but regardless still worried because you've seen Batwoman take down other villains...honestly though none of the were as powerful as Poison Ivy. You looked into each others eyes again, her green emerald eyes were just so mesmerising. And once again the two of you kissed once more. "Ahem, you called?" Ah, yes Poison Mary as you liked to call her. 

"Yes, I'm going to need your help." Pamela replies, she lets you down out of her arms gives you another quick kiss, along with a sly smirk. The redhead went over to the other said redhead, aka Mary and probably explained her plan. You had promised not to pry, but like you said you were all in. Pamela came back over to you, "Above all else, I want you. We'll get out of this City together." Pamela promises, and even though that might be a difficult promise, you held her to that.