#whatiamlearning

- The Bad. - The Good. - The Ugly - What I am Learning - How I am Growing - Conclusion,

The Bad.

Today has been one of those days that just seems to keep getting worse. It started off with a missed phone call from my lawyer about my SSI, which had me feeling down right from the start. I was really looking forward to getting some good news, but now I have to wait to hear back and find out what was so important. The bad.

The Good.

I did have a therapy session today, which went alright, but it's still tough to talk about everything that's been going on. My therapist is great and always makes me feel better, but some days are just harder than others. The good. My boyfriend has been working on some projects all day, which has been great to see, but it's also a reminder that I haven't been able to do much lately. I've been trying to figure out how to use this Oracle Virtual Machine, but I just can't seem to get the hang of it.

The Ugly

To top it off, I'm starving and there's nothing good to eat. I feel like I've tried everything, but nothing seems to satisfy my cravings. I just want to take a nap and start over tomorrow. Hopefully tomorrow will be a better day. I just feel like I keep struggling to miss opportunities if that makes any sense. I have so many things going on at once at all times and I don't know which direction to go with. Not to mention the fact that I am actively self teaching myself how to do all this new computer tech. I am trying to figure out how to setup a new wordpress site through oracle so that I can have the domain that I want and not have to pay for the service. Which would be AMAAAZING! Because who wants to have to pay for things when you can get them for free? Am I right?

What I am Learning

Its just really hard. It is one of the most challenging things that I have put on my plate in a really long time. Not to mention the fact that I am not that tech savvy to begin with. HA HA. But I will preserver in the end! I don't know what sparked the initiative to want to do this inside of me was but whatever it is I kind of like it.

How I am Growing

I was talking to my therapist today about how I've never really been one to take initiative in my life. I've always just went with the flow and let other people be the conductors in my life. However, more and more recently that's been changing. I have been more willing to take the first step and push myself to do and try things I never would have before. Its a really exhilarating feeling. I can feel and see myself becoming a new woman that I love and appreciate and respect. I am no longer shying away from things that make me feel insecure or obsolete. I am taking challenges head on. Not only am I facing these challenges but most of the I conquer as well. This is not to say I don't get frustrated or stuck sometimes because believe me, I do. But I am learning how to take breaks and do things in increments instead of trying to rush and get everything done all in one sitting. I really think that I have my boyfriend and starting this new company to thank for my new found talents. I would have never been this patient with myself if life never put certain obstacles in my way forcing me to slow down and embrace things step by step. I literally have no choice but to do so in some circumstances and now I try to apply it with everything I do. Stop being so impulsive and think.

Conclusion,