#vrin score

For this post, I’m going to give a little lesson on business and how it relates to the results you're getting in your love life. Studies support the idea that everything and everybody has a quantifiable value on the open market; and everybody’s out to get the best deal possible in love and in life. While a person’s perceived value can certainly be subjective (we all have unique preferences--hence the term, “one man’s trash is another man’s treasure”), typically the vast majority will agree upon what’s a “good catch” and what’s a not-so-good one.

So to help you get a better idea of what you have to offer, what kind of people you'll likely attract, and what you can do to increase your success in the dating game, I’m going to teach you about your VRIN Score. VRIN stands for traits concerning value, rarity, inimitability, and non-substitutability.

Let’s take a look at each factor:

Value - How much value do you provide? You must be able to out-perform competitors.

Rare- To be of value, you must be considered rare. The price of a resource is a reflection of it’s value. (Or in the case of dating, how selective you are with your time, energy, and emotions is a reflection of your value. Also, how you practice self-respect and maintain boundaries conveys your value).

Inimitable- How unique are you? How difficult would it be for someone else to do what you do? Are you unrivaled, unparalleled, or matchless with what you have to offer?

Non-Substitutable- Can you be replaced? How easy would it be for someone to substitute you?

Now I know this might seem like a kind of morbid approach to take when it comes to dating, but it shouldn't be seen that way. It’s really just about striving to be the best version of yourself for your own sake, and for the sake of your partner.  

When you dedicate yourself to self-improvement, and work on improving your “VRIN score,” you'll make yourself an indispensable, unmatched asset that any man or woman would feel like an absolute idiot to let go of.

What it really all comes down to is self-improvement. Studies show that the more positive qualities and traits you bring to the table, the better you will do in love. In other words:

Dedication to Self-Improvement = Better Dating Results

Now let’s take a look at what assets people search for when “shopping” for potential partners. As superficial as some of these may seem, the research shows this is what people look for when seeking out a partner:

1. Physical Appearance

2. Possessions or money

3. Status or prestige

4. Information or Knowledge

5. Social Graces or Personality

6. Inner Nature

Research shows that the happiest couples are the ones who are more or less balanced in each of these areas, or at least balanced out by being complimentary of one another (i.e. beautiful women who date less attractive, yet prestigious men. Or handsome men who date less attractive women with great personalities).

The good news is that while there are certain things about ourselves we may not be able to change, there are many things within our power to improve. To help give you an idea here are a few action steps you can take:  

Physical- You can work out, eat healthy, get enough sleep, get gussied up and well-groomed, and give your wardrobe a little boost.

Emotional- Take note of areas in need of improvement (do you ever get too angry, jump to conclusions, or let assumptions and emotions get the best of you?) Try to start practicing emotional maturity. This means being patient, kind, and loving, and maintaining a positive attitude even when things don’t go your way. It means being communicative of your emotions in a rational way, and being respectful of your partner’s.

Intellectual- Read Books, take classes, learn a new language, travel, study popular topics of interest, dig deep and research subjects that you’re passionate about. (To me) there’s nothing quite as sexy as someone who is a wealth of information and passionately shares their knowledge with others (and I know there are many others who agree).

Financial- Pay off debt, save money, invest your money, start a business, hire a financial consultant.  

Personality - Exude confidence, meet new people, be engaging, be kind, sociable, outgoing, charismatic, and empathetic. Be positive and fun to be around.

Spiritual- You can take up a spiritual practice, be kind, practice philanthropy, take time to meditate, and get in touch and in tune with yourself/the Universe.

Time and time again, studies have shown that the more equitable the partner’s assets, the happier the couples will be. If you wish to date a person of value, the most powerful thing you can do is become a person of value yourself. Be value, and you'll attract value. Make self-improvement and the desire to be the best version of yourself a consistent part of your life, and you'll be well on your way to attracting the man or woman of your dreams.

I hope you enjoyed this article, and I wish you all the best in life and love!

All my love,