#vibrating aggressively

going crazy over all the info we got from YONAH and Deep Cover. i really really really REALLY love her little diss track at the end of Deep Cover. it like. it just shows that what she really hates is not necessarily Evil, but Weakness. which i think she associates the two in some ways. to let yourself be controlled by your emotions and to have that stop you from doing what "needs to be done", that is what weakness is to her, i think... she isn't weak because she believes she isn't easily influenced by her personal feelings. she believes that she doesn't let emotions blind her judgement and keep her from doing what needs to be done. Unlike Everyone Else 🙄!

all of this fits really well with the speculation that she may have been abused in some way growing up. and that creates a very interesting parallel between her and Amane. Amane believes that undergoing trials and never giving up will make her stronger, better, and more worthy of living. Kotoko believes that to become better and stronger, you must be punished and face the consequences without being given any mercy. showing mercy will only encourage further Evil.

but we do know that Amane both wants to give others mercy and wants others to give her mercy. that's what she wants, but it conflicts with what she's been taught all her life. Kotoko though doesn't seem to even want to entertain the idea of mercy. she knows that mercy will only encourage weakness and Evil. she has no hope that mercy could do anyone any good.

this part in YONAH made me go insane. (translation source)

Kotoko: In order to stop someone, you have to squeeze their throat. Without mercy.

bc then we have those lyrics from The Purge March...

So nary a sound can be uttered a second time, I’ll crush your throat too