Viabinary experiences I’ve had: Being uncertain whether to pick ‘female’ or 'other’ on questionnaires if the 'other’ option doesn’t have a text box, because I feel like picking 'other’ requires me to deny my femaleness and picking female requires me to deny my non-binary-ness. Feeling invisible when asked my pronouns, because I am AFAB and prefer she/her pronouns. Feeling like I still have a connection to cisgender, because I’m AFAB and mostly female, but people all assume you can’t be both non-binary and cisgender. An ongoing uncertainty about whether I’m just GNC or actually nonbinary, and how much my feeling of disconnection with full femaleness is due to being an aroace autistic person who’s constantly presented with an NT allo-allo model of femininity. I don’t know if this is a viabinary thing, but I’m pretty sure I don’t feel gender dysphoria, or if I do it’s very subtle, so I feel like an imposter among all these people with 'real problems’. Not wanting to be closeted but feeling like there’s no point coming out because I’m fine with my name and pronouns, and sometimes it bothers me more to be treated as 'third gender’ than as 'female’, and people who know I’m nonbinary often default to seeing me as 'third gender’. Feeling left out when people describe nonbinary people as people who are neither male or female. Feeling like I’m in the liminal space between nonbinary and binary (cisgender). Feeling like a traitor to unaligned nonbinary people because I call myself female-aligned and don’t mind being lumped in with binary women as long as it’s a fairly inclusive space. Alternatively, feeling like I’m intruding on nonbinary spaces because unaligned people need them more.
